The Gossip Girl star would like some awards recognition, please. Also today: Leo DiCaprio taps into his murderous side, yet another CSI departure, and a Noah's Ark movie might be imminent.

You hoped it was over, but Rebecca Black's moment will go on. Also today: Lincoln finds his wife, Nickelodeon shows both old and new receive some good news, a new ABC show receives some bad news, and Ellen Page is headed to be neurotic in Rome.

While interviewing iCarly's Miranda Cosgrove, The Talk host Holly Robinson Peete set out to win some "mommy cool points," but ended up winning a whole lot of kid-embarrassment-points when she forced her sons to question and then hug Miranda.

Rod Blagojevich may not think so, but he was a bad governor. Luckily, he is entirely self-aware when it comes to how badly he is in need of a computer tutorial. Lesson one? Turning the darn thing on.

Once upon a time, we were all proud of the cheesy dramedies that got us through adolescence. Then we grew up, and we traded in Mr. Belding for Mr. Big, All That for SNL, and Full House for, well, House.

Once daily we suspend our rabid and filthy gossiping to do the Lord's work: Recognizing one silly comment amidst a sea of silly comments so that we may all be sillier, and thus feel closer to space-god. Today: Poetry!

Here's a little thing to make you feel ancienter and terribler than you already do: On Monday, the most watched show of all the shows was iCarly. Yes, Nickelodeon's techno-feminist revision of I, Claudius is very, very popular.