The Terry Gilliam-directed fourth hour segment of the Today Show continues apace. Today the show's online correspondent showed up with a report on what the internet people were talking about, and apparently it's Hoda Kotb's cleavage. She should flaunt it!

Pancake painter-to-the-stars Dan Lacey has completed yet another work of art suggested by you, the celebrisexually-obsessed readers of this blog. Today: Hoda Kotb and Kathie Lee Gifford wrestle nude, on a pancake. You can buy this thing!

The Society of Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center hosted its second annual Spring Ball at the Plaza on Tuesday night. More than 350 people turned out for the NBC Universal-sponsored event, including NBC Universal president Jeff Zucker and his wife Caryn (left), Mort Zuckerman, Robert De Niro and Grace Hightower, Julia and David Koch, Tory Burch and Lyor Cohen, Hilary Geary and Wilbur Ross, Jonathan and Somers White Farkas, Shoshanna Lonstein Gruss, Peter and Jamee Gregory, Ginny and Tiki Barber, Sherman and Chris Meloni, Frank and Kathie Lee Gifford, Hoda Kotb, Peggy Siegal, Natalie Morales, Valesca Guerrand Hermes, Jennifer Creel, Renee Rockefeller, Alexandra Lebenthal and Jay Diamond, Danielle Ganek, Kimberly Kravis, Muffie Potter Aston, Hilary Gumbel, Dr. Harold Varmus, Dennis Basso, Heather Mnuchin, Anne Grauso, Sylvester and Gillian Miniter, Gigi Mortimer, Sara Ayres, Shafi Roepers, Leslie Jones, and LL Cool J. [PMc, Wireimage, NYSD]

Hey, it's the fifth of May everyone! Time to watch Kathie Lee embarrass herself on national television in a celebration of what white people think is Mexican culture.

Ohh Hoda Kotb. The perpetually drunk Today Show hostess was celebrating St. Paddy's day pretty hard on-air this morning. Over at CBS, they were only pretending to drink. Take a cue, Hodes.

Oh, Kathie! After Hoda Kotb accused her of cheating on a trivia question with the world's most mandatory search engine, the TV hostess said, "I do not know how to Google." Let's help her out!

Martha Stewart is mystified by "Notorious B.I.G.," and believes all black people know each other. Kathie Lee Gifford thinks Hoda Kotb was born in Africa. Welcome to post-racial American television!

You know the story: the Today show is now produced by Tristan Tzara, so the program's fourth hour has become a surreal Dadaist tone poem of old ladies yelling. Today's installment: Kathie Lee sleeps naked.

On the 110th hour of the Today show this morning, Kathie Lee got a little randy. She was talking about a specific kind of kiss, and felt compelled to demonstrate it on everyone around her.

It may have seemed for a time that Today fourth hour cohost Hoda Kotb was the drunk of the show. But Hoda has now launched a campaign against Kathie Lee, who's conveniently on vacation.

The fourth hour of the Today Show is when Kathie Lee Gifford unhinges her jaw and swallows up airtime by abusing co-host Hoda Kobt and displaying sexual frustration. Two clips after the jump.

On the Today show, Hoda and Kathie Lee took suggestions from Facebook friends. One was for Hoda to date Anderson Cooper. Awkward pause... "Interesting idea....," stifled laughter. They believe he is homosexual, you see.

This morning on Today's fourth hour, Kathie Lee Gifford found a new way to get a dig in at her co-host Hoda Kotb: playing the video clip we posted Friday documenting Hoda's on-air drinking habit.

Two months ago, the Today show's Hoda Kotb swore "I don't drink really that much!" Really? This compilation is an intervention. Hoda, you may drink more than the entire cast of Fox & Friends.

The trundling disaster that is the Today Show's fourth hour—in which Hoda Kotb and Kathie Lee Gifford pick nits out of each other's hair and talk about hot flashes—rumbled into Horny Town Station this morning. Crooner Harry Connick Jr. was on, promoting something or other, and the ladies just could not get enough of him. Flanking him on two sides they made awkward sex sandwich jokes, prompting Kathie Lee to call the Egyptian Kotb "rye bread." Oy. Then Kathie made a joke about Connick's man business and somewhere Jeanie Linders cackled with delight and I had a flashback to my first year out of college, spent old lady wrangling. Clip is above.

The Tribeca Film Institute hosted a benefit screening for the Quantum of Solace last night, which was followed by an afterparty at Tavern on the Green. Attendees included Daniel Craig, Becki Newton, Chris Diamantopoulos, Robert De Niro and Grace Hightower, Craig Hatkoff and Jane Rosenthal, Julia Stiles, Kelly Killoren Bensimon, Jeffrey Wright, Debra Messing, Andre Balazs, Andrew Saffir and Daniel Benedict, Hoda Kotb, Jill Stuart, John Sykes, Judy McGrath, Howard Stringer, Rob Wiesenthal, Liya Kebede, Stewart Rahr, Molly Sims, and Serena Altschul. [PMc, Wireimage, GoaG]

♦ Charges will not be filed against Shia LaBeouf in connection with his car accident in LA in July. He may still lose his license, though, for failing to submit to a blood-alcohol test after the crash. [E!]
♦ Lindsay Lohan is so scared of her dad that she may take out an order of protection against him. [P6]
♦ Last week it was rumored Leonardo DiCaprio and Bar Refaeli had split up. Now it's rumored they're back together. [OK!]
♦ Robert De Niro is a giant pain to work with who makes "weird midnight phone calls." Or at least that's what Harvey Weinstein and Quentin Tarantino said in a taped phone conversation from 1997 that's just now been leaked. [P6]
♦ Julia Roberts left the Waverly Inn covered up in a pashmina, which means it's time for a fresh round of rumors that she's secretly pregnant. [The Sun]

Today hosted a very meta discussion this morning about Sue Simmons' WNBC f-bomb and Bill O'Reilly's old Inside Edition eruption, and anchpr Kathie Lee Gifford is extremely sympathetic toward both of the old TV hands and their embarassments. She told co-host Hoda Kotb there's always a chance she'll have her own "FUCK IT! DO IT NOW!" breakdown: "We're having fun, because tomorrow it could be you and I." Or maybe she was thinking of a more mild "what the FUCK are you doing" outburst. After the jump, listen to Gifford talk about how you can barely cuss anyone out in a TV studio any more because of all the satellites and bloggers and so forth.

Here's a clip of John Legend creeping out Today Show fourth-hour co-host Hoda Kotb. Just because. Skip to the end (1:00 mark), when Hoda awkwardly pseudo-grinds with Legend and then he simulates going down on her. It's fun for the whole family, or at least the unemployed members.