Better start brown-bagging it if you're a New York Times employee; starting February 4, the cost-cutting newspaper will increase cafeteria prices by 3.9%, according to an email announcement to staffers today. But don't worry! Management would like you to know that coffee prices won't change-hungry employees hopped up on caffeine are both prettier and more industrious! Wonder if those catered lunches for masthead-occupiers are going to get a price-jump? Oh wait, they're already free! To be fair, prices will still be "8% to 10% below the average for the neighborhood," according to the memo. The Times cafeteria is run by Restaurant Associates, which also manages the eateries at Conde Nast, Hearst and Google-anyone know if those companies are also bumping up their prices? Let us know. Memo after the jump.

Where did Hearst president Cathie Black pick up her steely ways? Why from "mad man" USA Today founder Al Neuharth of course! (She said it, we didn't.) In a November interview at the 92 St. Y with New York Post gossip Liz Smith, Black dishes about being a career woman and her early days with Neuharth. One gem? Neuharth kept his employees alert by keeping the office temp at 55°. "All you could think about was how damn cold you were," Black says. Watching employees hobble around on frostbitten toes is fun times! Watch the video after the jump. [92YBlog]

Hearst Magazines president Cathie Black is a total hardass. "You suck it in if you're ever driven to tears at the office," she tells the San Francisco Chronicle. "Get over it." Yikes. (Not that we particularly disagree, but when we say it, it's a lot less terrifying. Probably because the only publishing corporation we preside over at present has to do with Christmas thank-you cards.) Black's the affable sort, though, no need to cower (though it's probably one of those unwritten office rules.) "I'm from Chicago. I have strong Midwestern values. I'm accessible," she says. Funny, she won't answer our calls. A little advice from her old pal Rupert Murdoch, with whom she worked at New York magazine? Don't hold meetings sitting down. "He told me, 'when I stand the meetings are shorter,' and I vividly remember that," Black says. Actually? That totally works.

Foster's Hearst Tower, his glass structure for the media conglomerate which owns Cosmopolitan, is ugly, says a critic for the Architectural Record. Which is the review you'd expect for lattice-work modeled on an Argyll sweater. [via Intelligencer]

So there was a book fair today at Hearst—of only Hearst authors. Odd. And so there's Cathie Black, Hearst's president, selling her memoir at a table in the atrium to her staff. [Portfolio]

Despite condemnations from Star editor and notorious nobody Julia Allison, who called Google's New York cafeteria "questionable," the New York Department of Health has decided the loudly colored eatery is safe enough for now, according to health-inspection reports found by the Hygenie blog. It's cleaner, even, than old-media stalwart Hearst's cafeteria. This despite the fact that Google houses its New York office in a grimy old Soho Chelsea bus repair shop and Hearst just spent $500 million on its new headquarters. (Photo by advencap)

Yahoo's online advertising partnership with newspapers is facing a new threat — from the newspapers themselves. Five of the nation's largest newspaper companies — Gannett, Tribune, Hearst, MediaNews, and Cox Newspapers — are teaming to create a one-stop shop for online advertising. A single sales force will be able to sell ads across all major markets. Hearst, MediaNews, and Cox remain members of the Yahoo consortium, but the new partnership is foreboding, especially for Yahoo president Sue Decker, who helped engineer the deal and keeps holding it up as a totem of Yahoo's new partnership strategy.

This "amazing" and fabulous opportunity of a lifetime—an auctioned-off internship at Harper's Bazaar—raises money for Bette Midler's New York Restoration Project. So blame The Divine Miss M for reinforcing the Haves' capability to purchase their credentials, at the same time as she raises money to restore neglected parks in economically-depressed 'hoods. Ah, the jaw-dropping irony. Or perhaps not so much—look who's a sponsor at the $50K-$99K level! Why, it's none other than the Hearst Corporation, parent publisher of Harpers Bazaar!

From the mailbag: "Did you guys hear that Hearst laid off the entire production staff of 17 magazine last week? Did you also hear that they announced in a meeting with production directors this morning that they are eliminating all production positions company wide starting in 2008? What's that... 60 people on 17 magazines having their positions terminated? That's gonna flood the market a little." Actually, we hadn't heard. On the one hand, it seems a little... over the top? On the other hand, it would definitely reduce costs! Anyone know anything more?

Former celebrity chef and current frozen foods pitchman Rocco Dispirito is bringing his unique blend of meatheadedness and meatballness to the Hearst Cafeteria today. Considering he guest-chef'd the Conde Nast lunchroom back in August, we'd have to say Hearst is getting served some sloppy seconds! Oh ha! [Sent From My Dell Desktop]

Aspiring Peter Braunsteins and other glossy magazine editrix fetishists may want to check out the shiny new escalators at the Hearst Building. If you peek through the glass at the right time, you might be able to see some Cosmopolitan and Marie Claire ladies' undercarriages. [NYM]

Who put the itching powder in media companies' Web 2.0-buying jocks? Well, Rupert Murdoch, obviously. Ever since he slurped up MySpace for what now looks like a song, everyone else is trying to find a bargain. Condé Nast bought Wired.com and then Reddit, Forbes just picked up Clipmarks, and now it looks like the Hearst Corporation is adding social shopping network Kaboodle to its kit. Sure, Hearst might be trying to inject some social-networking mojo into its readership, but we suspect this deal is more about pulling the rug out from under Condé Nast's competing portfolio of travel and fashion websites, which use Kaboodle's technology. Such macho posturing over such girly pursuits. Well, whatever scratches your itch, guys.

Eric Nicholson, former Jane editor and one-time America's Next Top Model judge, has just departed his job as senior editor at Marie Claire. He recently told Jane Pratt's radio show, reprinted in WWD, of his time at Hearst that "Yeah, it's definitely bigger and different. I wouldn't say better. My heart always will be at Jane magazine with you." That might have been the straw that broke the camel's back. According to one version of the story, editor Joanna Coles tossed the trade rag at him and ordered him out of the office. But hold on, drama queens. According to a Hearst spokesperson, he's leaving the magazine for a number of reasons, and any interactions, which were non-dramatic in nature, happened in a private room. We're sure he'll land on his very expensively-clad little feet. And we sure hope he gets all Atoosa for his second act!

Hearst President Cathie Black on the best way to fire people. (Answer: Never alone.) [WWD]

• Will Ron Burkle make a play for AMI? Will he bid on Dennis Publishing? And would he merge his recently-acquired Primedia Enthusiast titles with those companies, particularly for AMI's distribution arm? And will he admit to (allegedly!) owning Radar? [WWD]
  

From Cosmopolitan, June 2007, p. 58, headline: "Gyno Uh-Oh!":

According to a reader, "there were no fewer that nine departures from Forbes in the last week or so." We're still doing the headcount to verify—but why so much turnover? And how can the magazine deal with a smaller staff? Meanwhile, Forbes' Louis Hau covers the events yesterday at the Newspaper Association of America convention, and quotes Lincoln Millstein, Heart's senior vice president of digital media.

In our mad dash to absorb the entirety of the first issue of Portfolio, we missed more than a few things (this is the case with most of our "analysis"). Most glaringly, we missed something about this Microsoft ad, which starts on page 104 and continues on pages 106-107. The building looks awfully familiar. It might even be here in town. Wait, wait, it's coming to us...

• Conrad Black to feds: "You got nothin'." [CP]
  

Party time! "All of Hearst Magazines' top management (editors-in-chief, publishers and other senior execs) are headed to New Orleans next week for the company's biennial executive management conference, hosted by Cathie Black," reports a Hearst spokeswoman. Well, doesn't that sound like fun! Glenda Bailey yukking it up with Ann Shoket! Joanna Coles doing research for a Marie Claire story! Kate White partying until 3AM in the French Quarter! David Granger wondering why he's there!