Set down your water bottle. Halt your DJ set. Doff your fedora and bow your head. The romance between Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson is no more, says Access Hollywood.
Nature, nurture, or Leno? That was the question last night when Jay Leno hosted the newly out (and pissed at Proposition 8) Wanda Sykes.
Gay men used to be known for their powers of artistic discernment, granting a priceless cultural imprimatur on the only trends, films, and iconic women who deserved it. No longer! Now, when even a reality show fourth banana like Audrina Patridge can have gays flinging themselves onto the pavement of Santa Monica Blvd. in a desperate attempt to be her new BFF, the standards for gay adoration have reached a watermark so low that it wouldn't even reach the hem of $220 capri pants. Thus it is that Tori Spelling has seen fit to anoint herself as a modern-day gay icon, an honor that E! talk show host Chelsea Handler tells The Advocate is simply canny marketing:
Hypersexual lesbian temptress Ellen DeGeneres usually keeps her daytime chat show somewhat neutered, but today's Brad Pitt interview (beamed via satellite from New Orleans, where he was busy building homeless shelters using only the telekinetic energy stored up in each ab) really brought out the gay.
History has show us that, when faced with adversity, less-fabulous civilizations' first response is force; more fully evolved, showtune-revering peoples, meanwhile, respond by PUTTING ON A MUSICAL!!! And so it goes with the ongoing battle for gay marriage acceptance in California, with Hairspray and South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut composer Marc Shaiman, in association with The Sacramento Community College Players, mounting Prop 8 - The Musical. It might be an exercise in literal choir-preaching written "six weeks later than he shoulda," but that doesn't make it any less of a heartwarming experience—at moments capable of sending jolts of pure theatrical electricity up your spine (we expect that to be hanging from a placard if this ever makes it to Broadway). And, let's face it, it's cheaper than tickets to the Celine Dion Taking Chances World Tour. Turn it into a game by trying to identify famous faces in the cast, then checking the credits at Funny or Die to see how many you got right.
We were shocked to learn that Dancing with the Stars continued its search for America's Next Top Cha Cha-ing Z-Lister after Cloris Leachman was unceremoniously ejected from the proceedings. (Did they really have to insist her partner grab her by her limbs, spin her around, and launch her into the bleachers? That still seems excessively harsh to us.) But continue it did, and multi-purpose, large-breasted Hollywood personality Brooke Burke deservedly took the show's coveted disco ball trophy.To pad out this foregone conclusion, first casualty Jeff Ross was invited back to roast the contestants, presenting the perfect opportunity to get in a few gay-themed jabs at Lance Bass. Because the gayest thing to come out of DWTS has to be Lance Bass—not the fuchsia breakaway sleeves, the Dr. Drew-elicited waterworks, or the soiled dance belt Ross had to peel out from between his ass cheeks following his humiliating first-week defeat. [Dancing with the Stars]
He Speaks! Ever since his Proposition 8 contribution came to light, LA Film Fest director Richard Raddon has maintained radio silence. Now, with his resignation confirmed, he's finally issued a statement about the brouhaha. We've got it for you after the jump:“I feel honored to have worked with such a wonderful group of people at the Los Angeles Film Festival over the last nine years. I am proud of our accomplishments. And I am proud to have worked at Film Independent, an organization whose principles and values of diversity and artistic integrity I cherish. I have always held the belief that all people, no matter race, religion, or sexual orientation, are entitled to equal rights. As many know, I consider myself a devout and faithful Mormon. I prefer to keep the details around my contribution through my church a private matter. But I am profoundly sorry for the negative attention that my actions have drawn to Film Independent and for the hurt and pain that is being experienced in the GLBT community.” [The Advocate]
For all the rumblings about a Cinemark boycott at Sundance or an El Coyote fatwa after the anti-gay Proposition 8 passed, one troubling scenario hit a little closer to home for a newly mobilized gay Hollywood. Almost two weeks ago, it came to light that LA Film Festival director Richard Raddon gave $1500 to the "Yes on 8" cause, a revelation that caused Raddon to tender his resignation to Film Independent. At the time, the board did not accept Raddon's offer, though the move didn't quite stem the debate over Raddon's future and whether a potential boycott would devastate the festival when it returns next summer. Now, David Poland breaks word of a new development.According to Poland, Raddon's now resigned for real — and it isn't simply a gesture that Film Independent can reject. The move comes after reporters at the LAT finally seemed to realize, "Oh hey, a big juicy Hollywood story in our backyard. Maybe we should cover it?" Their weekend piece explored not only Raddon's donation but the division that exists within gay Hollywood over how to proceed:
Last week's SNL had no less than eight sketches featuring gay themes or gay content. The comedy in these sketches, without exception, derived from one of three premises: 1. Men kissing or otherwise enjoying each other's bodies. 2. Men acting effeminately. 3. Men describing the sex they've had with other men. And then there was that part where Seth Meyers silenced the anti-Prop 8 audience by telling then, "OK. Vote's over." All this led us to describe the proceedings as a gay minstrel show. The Advocate approached Meyers to defend the episode. Unfortunately, the one question we really wanted the head SNL writer to answer—what was up with that "Vote's over" thing?—is never addressed. He did have lots of defensive things to say about the rest of the show. Here are the greatest hits, in no particular order.
BREAKING: Six of seven CA Supreme Court agreed today to review the legal challenges to Prop 8 brought by married same-sex couples. Until they rule, all further same-sex marriages are suspended, and the status of those already wed remains to be determined. What are the chances they'll overturn the challenge? Slim, but they have done so in the past: "In 1966, the California Supreme Court struck down an initiative that would have permitted racial discrimination in housing. Voters had approved the measure, a repeal of a fair housing law, by a 2-to-1 margin." Hang in there, D.L. Hughley—we realize how confusing all of this can be! [LAT]
We consider ourselves connoisseurs of beleaguered (but enthusiastic!) NBC chief Ben Silverman, so we were a little surprised when we heard that Kim Masters had published a rumor roundup on The Daily Beast today that included three whole paragraphs tracking speculation that Silverman might be gay. Had our gaydar been scrambled by distinctly unfabulous shows like My Own Worst Enemy and Project Lipstick, we wondered? Then we read the article, in which Masters (citing Defamer as her primary source) appears to lay out her entire same-sex case by mistaking some of our "funny ha-has" for actual, industry-pervading rumors:
ABCNews.com was way ahead of the Prop 8 curve, promoting early debate on what would evolve into the hot button topic of the day with such non-award-winning reportage from the front lines of the sexual-orientation culture wars as "Stars' Gay Marriage Possible Career Suicide," and "H'wood's Bisexual Double Standard: Hot for Girls, Gross for Guys." Today, they once again enter the emotional fray, with a sensitively argued think-piece entitled "Prop 8 Sparks Gay-Black Divide: Wanda Sykes Comes Out Amid Black Homophobia and Interracial Division Between Gays." It begins:"When comedian Wanda Sykes disclosed during a rally in Las Vegas this week that she has been in a same-sex marriage since October, no one cheered louder than those who face the double indemnity of being black and gay." "Double indemnity?" Yes, growing up black and gay is a lot like a life insurance clause payable upon accidental death. Thanks for your keen, not-at-all-exploitative insights into this sensitive issue, Susan Donaldson James. Why aren't we surprised you also happen to be the writer of "Stars' Gay Marriage Possible Career Suicide?" Bonus STFU Link: D.L. Hughley explains to Dan Savage how he isn't "particularly homophobic, but when I read the bill, I found it confusing." Kind of like how we find his fame confusing, and the fact that CNN has given him a show confusing.
After all our trouble wrangling up moving boxes and change-of-address forms, Stephen Baldwin has officially reversed his decision to relocate to Canada. Reports this morning say that the bitter Republican convert was just joking about that pre-election pledge to head north in the instance of a Barack Obama victory, adding that the whole mess amounted to less a broken promise than yet another grave misunderstanding by humorless liberals. Whoops! Now we're told he even likes Obama:"The liberal Democrats who didn't get that I was joking need to lighten up," the born-again Christian told Page Six. "Obama is obviously talented and intelligent, and I have great respect for the man. He's got my full support, and I'm gonna be praying for him and his administration." Oh. Our bad, we guess, but let there be no mistaking his regard for the gays, whom he still loathes enough to submit to a Billy Ray Cyrus ass-tattoo if/when same-sex marriage is legalized nationwide. Not much of a concession considering his recent history, but we'll launch a Facebook club on its behalf just in case. Anything to help the cause!
Where do you mine for easy laughs when you no longer have the most satirizable election in history at your disposal? In SNL's case, that would be the Gays, a topic this week's Paul Rudd-hosted episode visited and revisited so often, we lost count. And where does the show stand on the subject, in this, arguably the most important week for gay civil rights in history? Enjoy the highlight reel above, accompanied by this handy synopsis: · The fun starts with a sketch about an overly affectionate family that builds to Samberg making out with Fred Armisen for no apparent reason. · Then there was a legitimately funny Digital Short in which Rudd and Samberg paint each other naked, that ends in what has to be the most violent scene in the show's history. (If the episode had a secondary theme, it would be guns blowing people's heads off.)· Moving along, we have a carload of seemingly straight guys admitting shocking things in song, that—surprise!—starts with Jason Sudeikis admitting he had sex with a male cab driver. · Here's where things get really interesting. Seth Meyers introduces the topic of Prop 8 on Weekend Update. The crowd boos, which annoys the anchor, who admonishes them by saying, "OK. Vote's over." What follows is an over-the-top flaming Bobby Moynihan as Hanna-Barbera character Snagglepuss, who decries Prop 8, but denies he himself is gay. He finally admits it, and says he has a "partner"—the Great Gazoo. · A parody of Beyonce's "Put A Ring On It" video featuring backup dancers Justin Timberlake, Moynihan, and Samberg in high heels and leotards. They could have played this straight, and it would have been funnier, but instead they lisp and mince the way gay people do (that's supposed to be sarcasm for those of you currently wearing your fierce, Tom Ford irony-ray-blocking sunglasses), and it gets old kind of quick. · Another direct reaction to Prop 8 features yet two more characters in the closet—tough guy parking attendants played by Rudd and Bill Hader. The humor derives from the fact that they are so in denial about their homosexuality, they act as if their random sex acts in bathrooms, and with each other, is all a joke. It ends with them proposing to each other and talking about how excited they are to have a wedding. Before you leap into the comments to either defend the material as hilarious and that's all that matters, or decry it as ugly stereotyping that couldn't come at a more insensitive moment, we'd just like to remind you all of one thing, OK? Vote's over.
Though Wanda Sykes has taped PSAs asking us to never again use the phrase, "That's so gay," we hope she'll make an exception in this case, because you know what's so gay? Wanda Sykes! The comedian has been a constant presence at the anti-Prop 8 marches in Los Angeles over the last week and a half, but on Saturday, she popped up at a Las Vegas rally and officially came out as a lesbian. What's more, she revealed that she went ahead and married a woman in October — and it wasn't Julia Louis-Dreyfus! Yes, we just made a joke about a New Adventures of Old Christine plotline. We're sure that five of you are very pleased. After the jump, relive the biggest hint Sykes ever gave us — her riff on gay marriage from the stand-up special Sick and Tired:
