Jen pulls an Angelina and lands a man. Selena Gomez pulls a Lohan and pleads "exhaustion." Pregnant Tori Spelling's paparazzi car crash. Liza Minnelli's fabulous yard sale. Tuesday gossip keeps its eye on the prize.
12/28 — That dude (GARY DOURDAN) from CSI who got busted for drugs. He was at Maxfield trying on a hat and a jacket... but he was spinning around in the jacket and tipping his hat like Justin Timberlake... looked like a total douchebag and was REALLY loud in the store so people would pay attention. Alas, the sales were so good that no one did and he left. [Hollywood PrivacyWatch is written by and for Defamer readers; send your sightings to tips@defamer.com.]
How's this for an unlikely couple? Former CSI star-turned-drug-runner Gary Dourdan and the singer responsible for the most annoying song of the decade, James Blunt, have apparently pooled together whatever cash they have left in their respective bank accounts and gone on holiday together. While on an Ibizan vacation of sin, the heroin/ecstasy enthusiast and the notorious player teamed up to stage a far racier version of Miley Cyrus’ homemade porny photo spreads, as they posed alongside at least three topless prostitutes female friends who were overjoyed to fake anal sex and engage in a little lesbian chic foreplay for the paparazzi. The NSFW photos, including a particularly fun shot of the blondest, nude-iest girl for hire who appears to be delighted to have her head shoved towards the third wheel's crotch, after the jump:
As predicted by a crisis-management think tank at USC's Annenberg School of Flack Studies in a research paper entitled, So, You're the Recently Fired Star of a Hit Series Picked Up Unconscious with a Serious Selection of Party Drugs: Now What?, CSI-alumnus Gary Dourdan has announced that the stash of heroine, cocaine, ecstasy, and prescription pills found in his car did not, in fact, belong to him:
· Still want more OT (Oprah/Tom)? We've compiled the interview's best moments. And yes, he addresses the indoctrination video you watched here. Verdict? Oprah: Asked the tough questions. Tom: Depressed. [Oprah.com]
· Yikes. We'd hate to see what Kanye would have written if EW had given his tour a B-minus. [kanyeuniversecity.com via Idolator]
· Now you can linger over assistant Jonathan's lovingly collaged FRIENDS 4 EVA!!! farewell poster for Jack Donaghy from last night's 30 Rock. [Videogum]
· It's time for accused Uma-stalker Jack "Tee-Hee" Jordan to have his say: He's humiliated! (Now that we think of it, Tee-Hee is the greatest nickname ever. Dibs!) [Reuters]
· "Hey, Gary! Good weekend? What?!" [People]
· The assault charges against Rod Stewart's retarded son have been dropped. [AP]
· Angelyne has the developers of the W Hotel over a barrel. Attagirl! [LAT]
As we write this, recent CSI casualty Gary Dourdan is likely recovering from an even gnarlier Coachella hangover than most: TMZ reports the actor was discovered by Palm Springs police asleep in his car at 5:21 a.m., upon which he was arrested on "suspicion of possession of heroin, cocaine, ecstasy and prescription drugs," otherwise known as the bare minimum required to make a Jack Johnson set seem remotely exciting. His genuinely pained mugshot—we seriously can't stare at it for more than a few seconds—is pictured above. Developing...
Noting that two cast members from TV's highest-rated procedurals—CSI's Gary Dourdan and Law & Order: SVU's Diane Neal—would be leaving their series at the end of their contracts, TVGuide.com's Michael Ausiello has reexamined the evidence, and concludes that these seemingly friendly departures were more likely the result of some less-than-amicable shitcannings:
TMZ.com's Starcatcher team, the internet's leading documentarians of the weave-scalping, paparazzi-hospitalizing atrocities being committed each night outside of Hollywood's most exclusive safe-harbors for violent insurgents, found themselves caught up in the brutality they so faithfully capture on video each night when the crew tragically wandered within pummeling range of an agitated C-lister. An excerpt from their report on a run-in with CSI star Gary Dourdan follows:
