Apparently it isn't just crackpot southern states that harbor a desire to go it alone. Vermont, which as a republic would have strong maple syrup exports, looks set to have several secessionist candidates running for office this year. [AP]

Trailblazing freedom-spreader Barack Obama has named Amanda Simpson, a transgender person, as a senior technical advisor to the Commerce Department. Which is apparently a Presidentially-appointed post, and therefore notable! Here's hoping that more former males and former females will one day be appointed to government posts that people actually understand, as well.
[Pic via]

Breaking: The Hipster Grifter is free. Oh boy.

Who will stand up for the rights of the brave NYC taxi driver who kicked two gay men out of his cab, for gay-hugging? Andrea Peyser will stand up for him. Enough of this gay PC crapola.

Maziar Bahari, the Canadian-Iranian Newsweek reporter who has been detained in Tehran's notorious Evin Prison since his arrest while covering the nation's post-election uprising in June, has arrived safely in London in time for the birth of his first child.

The long, criminally hipster tale of Hipster Grifter Kari Ferrell has finally reached the portion of "Phase Three: Justice" where she receives her dramatic jail sentence.

Hippies in Santa Fe, New Mexico just want to build their "church" and drink ayahuasca out back, in the shed, and trip balls. Neighbors are not so happy about it. It's a classic religious freedom case. With magical elves.

They banned smoking in bars, and people said nothing, because they did not smoke in bars, except sometimes if they were really drunk. But now NYC wants to ban smoking in parks, and lo! Smokers finally get some public sympathy.

Remember that shoe-throwing Iraqi journalist who tossed one at Dubya in December? Muntadhar al-Zeidi's being released from prison early, for good behavior. Meanwhile, don't know about newspaper economics in Iraq, but the Baghdad Expos: still need a good splitter. [MSNBC]

The Way We Live Now: Counting the many things we can't afford. We can't afford plastic bag taxes. We can't afford lemonade stand licenses. We can't afford our own crayfish. And why should we? This is America or whatever!

Yale University Press is publishing a book about the Danish Muhammad cartoon controversy of 2005. But Yale will not publish any images of the cartoons, or Muhammad, because Yale University Press is run by freedom-disregarding accommodationist pussies.

For reasons that we cannot fathom, bouncers and cops in the UK are now using a device to ensure that people who sniff coke don't get into nightclubs. What?

New information has emerged on the child labor violations of "fledgling internet site" (ha) RadarOnline. We will cover this story with the same verve with which RadarOnline covers Octomom. Illegal, baby-endangering verve, that is!

Look, this is the business card of what we would call an "Urban Marketing Agency," from back in the olden days. Oh, the shamelessness! Luckily we have made much progress since then:

The White House press loves to complain about the terrible treatment they all endure, stuck in the basement of the White House waiting for hours to be lied to. So it may do them some good to see what real repression is like. How about this upcoming Saudi Arabia trip?

Roxana Saberi, the Iranian-American freelance journalist who was freed this month after being (bizarrely) sentenced to eight years in prison in Iran for "spying," gave her first real interview today, to NPR. Her ordeal sounds even worse than you might have imagined:

Should you, the Average Joe Schmoe Loser Nobody "Little Person," be allowed to see all the dirty details of a rich, famous person's divorce? Rich, famous people do not think that you should, surprisingly!

If you don't follow the denim industry closely you could be forgiven for thinking that world has gone crazy. Levi's, the Americanest jeans you can possibly buy without a flag sewn on them somewhere, is publicly endorsing gay marriage. The gays have literally wrapped themselves around George W. Bush's butt!

All this hippie wanted was to cast off his wizard's robe and be nude and free and happy at Coachella. The cops weren't convinced. So they Tasered him. Police still fear wizard wang. [Animal NY]

Iraqi courts have cut the prison sentence for the hero shoe-hurling-at-Bush journalist from three years down to one. Huzzah! And on the same day Obama visited Iraq. Coincidence??? Open your eyes, sheeple! [WSJ]