Former New York Times restaurant critic and overall NYT star Frank Bruni was named an Op-Ed columnists last May, just after Frank Rich's departure. We had high hopes! We were promised that Bruni's column would be "a sharp, opinionated look at a big event of the last week, from a different or unexpected angle, or a small event that was really important but everyone seems to have missed, or something entirely different." How's that going?

The New York Times has appointed former restaurant critic Frank Bruni as its new Sunday (and Thursday) op-ed columnist. It sounds like he'll be taking over the big picture spot on the Sunday page that Frank Rich is vacating:

Oyez! Oyez! Oyez! All persons having interest in Top Chef Season 7 DC, are admonished to draw near and give their attention, for the season is now screening. God save nothing. It's all screwed!

After a negative review of his new pizzeria Pulino's by New York critic Adam Platt, the Balthazar and Pastis owner lashed out in a public letter calling Platt "over-weight" and "bald". Here's the whole Bob Dylan-referencing screed.

• The week in reviews: Sam Sifton of the Times pronounces Madangsui the best Korean BBQ in Manhattan and gives it one star; the Post's Steve Cuozzo isn't all that impressed with Le Caprice; Time Out's Jay Cheshes has mixed feelings about Susur Lee's Shang; GQ's Alan Richman heads over to Ken Friedman and April Bloomfield's Breslin; and Gael Greene checks in on Café Boulud.
• It's looking likely that Scott Conant will take over the Table 8 space. [Eater]
• A peek inside the Guggenheim Museum's new restaurant, Wright. [NYT]|
• Nightlife: A new club on West 29th Street called Amnesia debuts tomorrow; and Mike Satsky's meatpacking club Provocateur should open shortly.
• More on the Tavern on the Green auction scheduled for next month. [NYT]
• Time Out lists off the 100 best things to eat and drink in New York. [TONY]
• The Flatiron Indian eatery Tamarind is opening a branch in Tribeca. [Zagat]
• Frank Bruni and Jonathan Safran Foer debated meat last night. [TONY]
• If your kid refuses to eat at McDonald's, watches Iron Chef religiously, and studies up on varieties of cheese, you probably have a "gastrokid." [NYP]

Former NY Times food critic Frank Bruni has signed a schmancy deal to bring his memoir Born Round to the small screen. What actor is going to play the tortured former fatty?

• The week in reviews: Sam Sifton of the Times gives Le Relais de Venise L'Entrecôte one star; Bloomberg's Ryan Sutton says Blue Hill "needs work"; Jay Cheshes of TONY has mixed things to say about Ed's Chowder House; Steve Cuozzo visits Ed's, too, giving it 2 1/2 stars out of four; Gael Greene checks out Casa Lever; and GQ's Alan Richman picks his fave fried chicken in NYC.
• Cru, which faced eviction this summer, is back with a new chef/menu. [NYT]
• The Soho Italian spot Piccola Cucina has reopened. [Zagat]
• Bruni's top burger is at Shake Shack; Colicchio picks The Spotted Pig. [TONY]
• Michelle Obama will make a cameo on Iron Chef in January. [NYT]
• Want to lose weight? Try eating tomatoes. [NYDN]

She got married last weekend, but Ivanka Trump will be getting another big stack of presents today. It's her 28th birthday. Also celebrating: Simon Doonan, Barneys' inimitable creative director, is turning 57 today. Mega-agent Binky Urban is 63. Fashion photographer Mario Testino is 55. Gavin Rossdale is turning 42. NBC News' Andrea Mitchell is 64. Private equity bigwig Wes Edens is turning 48. Former Page Sixer Paula Froelich is 36. Henry Winkler turns 64. Actress Nia Long is turning 39. Kevin Pollak is turning 52. Harry Hamlin is 58. Cash Cab host Ben Bailey is turning 39. And Olympic gymnast Nastia Liukin is 20. A few weekend birthdays after the jump.

• Barack Obama had lunch today at Craftsteak, just so you know. [NBC]
• Corsino, the latest restaurant by Jason Denton of 'ino and 'inoteca fame, has opened in the space previously occupied by Frederick's Downtown. [UD, GS]
• Unfortunate news for new NYT restaurant critic Sam Sifton: His predecessor, Frank Bruni, says it's impossible for critics to be anonymous these days. [CNN]
• Did you know LA has surpassed NYC as the "deli capital of America"? That's what the author of a new book on the delicatessen says, at least. [LAT]
• Megu is the latest restaurant to get slapped with a labor lawsuit. [GS]
• Bon Appétit isn't following in Gourmet's footsteps and closing down. But it did reportedly hand out pink slips to a bunch of staffers today. [Gawker]
• Fashion stylist Robert Verdi, who says "thin is in," isn't the most tolerant guy in the world: "I think food is for fat people and poor people," he says. [Cut]

Sam Sifton, the New York Times' brand new restaurant critic issued his very first review today! DBGB, the most recent addition to Daniel Boulud's dining empire (and "one of our more gregarious and intelligent restaurateurs, according to Sifton) landed a solid two stars from the man chosen to succeed Frank Bruni. Do forgive him, though, for starting off the review with the words, "Hey, ho, let's go!" He's new around here and probably pretty excited about his new gig, which makes him the city's most powerful food person. But he should calm down after he eats his way through the first 100 meals or so. [NYT]

Being a movie star — or motherhood — makes Sarah Jessica Parker look sleepy. TLC learns its Gosselin lesson. Quentin Tarantino loves sequels. And Katy Perry teaches us the power of tit-pics. TGIF, you attractive devils! It's your gossip roundup!

• The war against the Jane Hotel marches on. Not only does Jane Street Neighbors United, the "coalition" now facing off against the Village hotspot, have a lawyer, blog and Twitter feed, it's retained a publicist, too. [NYT]
• Openings: Nolita's Travertine debuts tonight with former Top Chef contestant Manuel Trevino behind the stove. And RobataNY opened yesterday in the EV.
• Tyra Banks explored the wide world of food trucks on her show today. And Frank Bruni's appearance on Martha Stewart's show last week is now online.
• The bar formerly known as Baraza has reopened as Summit Bar. [GS]
• The Bagatelle team is turning Merkato 55 into an Italian restaurant. [GoaG]
• Desperate times: Starbucks unveiled a line of instant coffee today. [WSJ]

• Roundups of restaurants opening in the next week or so. [TONY, Eater]
• A look at the last-minute work involved in getting The Breslin, Ken Friedman's latest restaurant, ready for its October 8 opening. [NYT]
• Photos inside Abe & Arthur's, which opens to the public next week. [Eater]
• You may soon able to booze it up in the shadow of the Statue of Liberty: The vendor in charge of concessions there has applied for a liquor license. [NYP]
• David Chang's Momofuku Ko is raising prices beginning next week. [Eater]
• Is celebuchef Wolfgang Puck planning a NYC outpost? Possibly. [Gothamist]
• A chat with Richie Notar, the man who runs the show at Nobu. [ObsessedTV]
• What has Frank Bruni been eating since stepping down as restaurant critic of the New York Times? Lots and lots of roast chicken, apparently. [Atlantic]

• Today was Frank Bruni's last day as New York Times dining critic. In honor of the momentous occasion, Bruni shares some thoughts on, well, just about everything you've ever wondered during his five-year tenure. [NYT, NYT]
• Bruni-blitz, con't: Two more interviews with Bruni are online today, including the longest one you'll probably ever see, courtesy of Team Eater. [Eater, TFB]
• The "disastrous, wipeout summer" that many chefs and restaurant owners were fearfully predicting just a couple of months ago never really came to pass, Steve Cuozzo happily reports today in the New York Post. [NYP]
• Today in food reviews: The Daily News' Danyelle Freeman gives The Mott three stars out of five; Pete Wells of the Times pays a visit to SHO Shaun Hergatt; Time Out's Jay Cheshes hits the Standard Grill and has very good things to say; and Bloomberg's Ryan Sutton surveys the city's sandwich scene.
• Corton's Paul Liebrandt may be widely respected chef. But to describe him as an unpleasant interview subject would be a huge understatement. [BlackBook]

• In its fall preview issue, New York surveys the nine spots opening soon in the meatpacking district, four of which happen to be at the Standard. [NYM]
• Related: Metromix's fall restaurant preview is now online. [Metromix]
• Amy Sacco is on the move: She's opening a Bungalow 8 in Amsterdam. [P6]
• A sneak peek at Yerba Buena Perry, which opens later this week. [Eater]
• Musical chairs: Ryan Bartlow, formerly of Sam Mason's Tailor, is now running the kitchen at Bar Carrera, the sister restaurant to Bar Veloce; and Shlomo Kashy is the new executive chef at Cafe at Country. [TSB, NYT]
• Danny Meyer finally tackles the questions that have been on your mind forever: He prefers flat water to sparkling and pancakes over waffles. [YaH]
• Speaking of Meyer, a few new details on his upcoming Maialino. [Zagat]

Former New York Times food critic has been unveiling all his secrets in service of promoting his book—his undercover aliases, his credit card numbers, his weight issues. Today, it's the grand lie that was his fake author photo.

• Cooking shows are all the rage right now with the Food Network and Travel Channel both witnessing record ratings. Real estate shows, however, have been bombing. Why? "Food can take away the pain." [Bloomberg]
• A Q&A with Danny Meyer, who says he hopes to regain the star that his Union Square Cafe lost recently just as soon as Sam Sifton takes over as Times dining critic, and that his big pet peeve are dishes with hazelnuts in them. [RG]
• Steve Hanson reports the eatery he's opening in the former Hog Pit space on Ninth Avenue will be casual American spot called Bill's Bar & Burger. [NYT]
• The chance the fish you're eating does not have some mercury in it? Virtually nil, according to a new report by government scientists. [NYT]

This morning former NYT food critic and media tour-taker Frank Bruni revealed the secret aliases he used, for reviewing restaurants! Way too late to matter. But we must know everything, from his bulimic childhood to his fraudulent credit card details.

• Danny Meyer will open a new restaurant in the Gramercy Park Hotel this November. Now it has a name. It will be called Maialino, or "little pig" in Italian, which was Meyer's nickname when he lived in Rome. [GS]
• Today in restaurant reviews: Frank Bruni issues his final review for the Times this week, giving the decidedly DIY eatery The Redhead a star; Time Out's Jay Cheshes hands out four out of five stars to Daniel Boulud's DBGB; the Daily News' Danyelle Freeman is pretty disappointed with Civetta; Bloomberg's Ryan Sutton samples the $100 platter of fried chicken at David Chang's Momofuku; and Alan Richman of GQ files a report on Sorella on the Lower East Side.
• Will Goldfarb and Kevin Pomplun's barbecue food truck, Picnick Smoked, has only been open a few days, but it's already totally overwhelmed. [GS]

• Not surprisingly, the prospect of a TGI Friday's opening across from the Greenmarket in Union Square has provoked all sorts of outrage. [Eater]
• On a related note (and notwithstanding the economic downturn), chain stores are rapidly expanding across the city, in case you haven't noticed. [NYT]
• Magnolia Bakery, coming off the heels of a minor scandal at its West Village location, reports that it's opening a Grand Central location this fall. [VV]
• Places to eat in the Hamptons should you happen to be on a budget. [Zagat]