Way back in October of aught-eight, we published the Gawker Guide to a Journalism Career. Lots of things have changed since then. For the worse, mostly! Time for an update. Aspiring journalists and other masochists, read on.

Meet Tracy Kachtick-Anders: artist, inventor, adoption activist, doula (like a midwife, but less science and more hippie) and confirmed girlfriend of Rosie O'Donnell. They met last month on Rosie's Ask Ro web chat.

One of the lessons of the downturn has been that repression is a recession-proof industry. Galas and fashion shows don't throw themselves, you know? Let's meet Lola Karimova, social circuit sensation and daughter of the brutal Uzbek dictaor Islam Karmiov.

Dead or alive, you cannot escape the reach of the gift guide, telling you in magazines, newspapers, and especially websites to spend, spend, spend your money on shiny, pretty things you can't afford. Why must they do this to you?

The bad thing about yesterday was that state politicians in Albany—the center of heterosexual evil in the Northeast—voted down gay marriage. The shiny silver lining was that we met State Sen. Diane Savino, new speechifying hero of equality!

After moving to L.A., this hypersexual British socialite and reality TV star couldn't land a headline, no matter how many nips she slipped or how much body paint she wore. Then, Casey Johnson planted a sex toy in her bed.

Tiger Woods may have apologized to his wife and family for running all around town with a succession of women, but that doesn't mean the ladies don't exist. Just like Tiger's wife, we all want to know who they are.

One day you're a high-flying banker, hanging with Penthouse pets and rappers and watching hot girls kiss at 'pajama parties'. The next the feds are raiding your office and humiliation awaits when websites find your Facebook page.

No one knows what Facebook and Twitter are really worth, sexy though the startups may be. But AdMob, an obscure company in Silicon Valley's hinterlands, has a very clear, solid value: $750 million in stock from acquirer Google. Yay boring!

Tommy Davis, the latest chief spokesman and outraged-interview-cutter-offer for the Church of Scientology, is a callow Hollywood brat, Tom Cruise hanger-on, and "drug revert" who thinks "L. Ron Hubbard is the coolest guy ever."

Inexplicably (but admirably) magnetic elderly author Salman Rushdie is now out on the town with another attractive younger lady: Min Lieskovsky. Who is she? We will tell you what we know, okay?

Bernie Madoff is the financial criminal of the past. Billionaire hedge fund chief Raj Rajaratnam is the financial criminal of the moment! Slick back your hair, watch Wall Street, and forget Ponzi schemes—insider trading is back, big time!

It's hard to explain Drue Kataoka. There's the hair. The intimate spiritual moments with aged Silicon Valley dons. And this new music video about net neutrality, co-starring Facebook fameballer Randi Zuckerberg. Think of Kataoka, perhaps, as Silicon Valley's Julia Allison.

The government has a lot going on right now, but that doesn't mean it's too busy for matters of the heart. That's why one of its virtual offspring set up a scheme to get you a ring, or die trying.

The New Yorker Festival is coming up! It's Lollapalooza for the urban intelligentsia. Tickets go on sale today at noon, and if you don't buy them immediately then forget seeing the good stuff. A guide to the good stuff, below.

Yale lab technician Ray Clark, the only "person of interest" in the Annie Le murder so far, is free for the moment. In the last 24 hours, we've learned a lot about Ray Clark.

Chuck Boustany must be pissed! He gave the official GOP rebuttal of Obama's speech, but it's mad heckler, Rep. Joe Wilson, who's getting all the attention. Oh well. Let's learn more about Joe, a histrionic right-winger who loves racists!

Sloane Crosley got a book deal by being the most popular book publicist in New York. Now, Sloane Crosley's book publicist has gotten a book deal herself. Taste the meta! There are only five other ways to get published now.

There are many things to love about Robert Hammond: he saved the High Line, he likes art, he's a snappy dresser! Now we find out he's rich too. We also know he's gay and single. Robert, will you marry us?

Superfamous Bollywood star Shahrukh Khan was racially profiled in the USA! For Indians, it's big news. But for Americans, it's unsettling—where do Indians fall on the "Racial Profile Outrage" scale? A complete cross-racial guide for you!