On Saturday, Australia will hold its federal election. The current conservative government—a center-right coalition led by the Liberal Party—is narrowly slated to win out, despite the fact that the Liberal Party appears to have laundered taxpayer money through a company the party owns.

Just a few days ago, we gave you a glimpse into the grim, Sisyphean nightmare that is the Twitter account of noted Shrek band Smash Mouth. In the aftermath, though, we discovered that not only does Smash Mouth have fans—Smash Mouth has angry fans. And even Smash Mouth fans deserve a voice.

Woe be unto those who conflate the way things are with the way things play out in their social media feeds. Steve Grand, an internet-famous gay musician, now has plenty of evidence of this after an observation of his in an interview with PrideSource caused a furor, by the internet’s standards (but in actuality is just people weighing in on a thing that other people are talking about because all we have is time to fill between our being born and dying). To interviewer Chris Azzopardi, Grand said:

Yesterday's post on Surra de Bunda, a Brazilian dance move in which a female rapidly buffets a man's face with her rear, brought a wealth of new information. Chiefly: Surra de Bunda does not mean "ass licking" but "butt fighting."

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It's rare that one feels as though they can make a difference on this Big Blue Marble—even more so when that difference directly affects an internationally beloved movie star who's fallen upon hard times. And yet there Defamer was, driving a harrowing sequence from last night's The Two Coreys. At first, we were paralyzed by the "He knows we exist!"-effect that occurs when any lowly Movable Type drone is acknowledged by an eight-times undefeated Tiger Beat Fantasy Boyfriend of the Month. But we soon enough regained rudimentary use of our limbs as we observed Haim being guided by new assistant Nelle to our post about his "I'm ready to work" Variety notice—already considered a masterpiece of the self-perpetuated-comeback trade-ad genre.