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City of Chicago Makes Boy Cry Hysterically By Rescinding His Award

Danny Gold · 02/13/12 09:45PM

This young man won a contest to design a new sticker for the city of Chicago. Then someone in the department noticed that there may be gang signs hidden in the design. The award was taken away. The young man did not respond well. Judging by his reaction, he is not cut out for the gang life.

Popular Lesbian Rapper Criticized for Homophobia

Danny Gold · 02/13/12 09:03PM

Out Magazine just published a profile on Odd Future member and one half of internet sensation The Internet, Syd the Kyd. The 19-year-old producer/artist has been with the collective since it first started gaining attention. She's also firmly stood by group leader Tyler, The Creator when he's been accused of misogyny and homophobia.

Supreme Court Justice Robbed At Machete-Point

Danny Gold · 02/13/12 08:42PM

Masked men wielding machetes robbed Supreme Court Justice Stephen Breyer and his wife this past week at their vacation home on the Island of Nevis. About $1,000 was taken in the attempt, and nobody was hurt. An arrest has yet to be made.

The Hot New Drug Everyone Will Soon Be Freaking Out About

Danny Gold · 02/13/12 08:17PM

It's been a little while since people freaked out about a new drug that all the kids are supposedly doing, but it's time again to cue up the fearmongering articles. This one comes to us from the Daily Mail, which warns us about the hottest new drug in England, methoxetamine. Also know as MXE, it serves as a legal alternative to ketamine. Your kids are most likely doing it in the bathroom right now as you read this.

Rapper Known For Sexually Explicit Songs Advises Teens On Sexually Explicit Behavior, Offends (UPDATED)

Danny Gold · 02/13/12 07:29PM

Rapper Too Short has had a moderately successful music career for more than two decades. He has not strayed far from the formula that made him famous: rhyming about sex. Specifically, how to get sex, how to have sex, how much he enjoys having sex, how much sex he has, and so forth. I was going to post up song titles to further reiterate my point, but most of the titles are too graphic, even for Gawker. You can pretty much do a madlibs line involving the words "pimp," "hoe," various body parts, and some familiar and not so familiar euphemisms for sexual acts. You get it. We can move on.

Don't Forget: Osama Loved Whitney Houston, Too

Max Read · 02/13/12 06:48PM

As we gather to collectively mourn one of the great voices of a generation, let's not forget this very odd detail from Sudanese poet Kola Boof's account of being kept as a sex slave by Osama Bin Laden, Diary of a Lost Girl: the terrorist mastermind loved Whitney Houston.

Semi-Legal Pastimes: A Night at the Underground Combat League

Hamilton Nolan · 02/13/12 04:25PM

There is no activity that you can imagine—legal or illegal, savory or unsavory—that is not occurring on a regular basis behind some closed door somewhere in New York City. Are there regularly occurring, unlicensed, and unregulated full-contact bloody ultimate fighting competitions happening in some underground gym way up in The Bronx, for example? Of course there are. This is a metropolis, after all.

Reddit Reluctantly Bans Child Porn

Adrian Chen · 02/13/12 01:35PM

Metastasized Xbox fan message board Reddit is a little less pervy this morning after it explicitly banned all "suggestive or sexual content featuring minors," aka child porn. Only took six years and a couple public scandals.