Dr. Michael Kamrava, the Beverley Hills fertility doctor who shoved 12 embryos into the baby parts of soon-to-be-"octomom" Nadya Suleman in 2008, will lose his license to practice medicine as of July 1. Kamrava, the California Medical Board argued in its decision, should have referred Suleman herself to a mental-health evaluation instead of helping her give birth to eight future therapy patients; it also found that the doctor had not exercised "sound judgment" in the cases of two other patients, neither of which were as bizarre or interesting as "octomom." [People; image via AP]

It's been a good few days for death stares in legislative sessions! Just a week after Rep. Patrick McHenry (R - N.C.) accused consumer advocate Elizabeth Warren of lying, provoking one of the great angry-shock faces of American politics, Australian opposition senator David Bushby meowed at his colleague, Labor senator Penny Wong. Meowed! Like, the actual noise. As you can see in the video of the incident, Wong was not pleased. If anyone ever asks you what the phrase "if looks could kill" means, please direct them to this GIF:

Facebook has been taking heat for letting kids under 13 use Facebook. So, people should be absolutely freaking out about this four-month-old fetus whose parents signed her up on Facebook and friended dozens of people.

A prominent startup founder dramatically unveiled a grilled cheese sandwich at the Wall Street Journal-affiliated "D" conference today and announced that a leading venture firm put upwards of $10 million into the cheese and bread combination. No, really.

That nice Boy Scout from down the street who's politely offered to fix America's finances, Rep. Paul Ryan, visited the White House today along with many, many other invited House Republicans. And Ryan, who has been known to sport a sad face when people say mean things about his policy ideas, had some tough words himself for that "demagogue" Barack Obama.

The one-time movie maven is now shifting her priorities a little bit, considering smaller projects. Also today: Taylor Lautner's dad is becoming a problem, Susan Sarandon wants you to be her teacher's pet, and an inevitable Hunger Games update.

Gluten taste! Chronic fatigue! E. coli! Lady clots! Food symbols! Cilantro nastiness! Sun safety! And eluding mosquitoes with potions made of science! It's your Wednesday Health Watch, where we watch your health—hotly, of course!

America's favorite "roommate" Shep Smith was on his Fox News kaffeeklatsch this afternoon discussing Weinergate and he just couldn't understand how the congressman could be confused about his own genitalia. It just bothers Shep so!

Sarah Palin was still in New York earlier today when one of the city's seven million resident commies managed to "tag" her garish AmericaBus.

Making small talk with your pot dealer sucks. Buying cocaine can get you shot. What if you could buy and sell drugs online like books or light bulbs? Now you can: Welcome to Silk Road.

Piper Palin is my favorite Palin. Sure, Bristol's plasticine attention-seeking is fun—and Willow's willful disobedience shows promise—but the littlest Palin daughter won my heart licking babies and carrying knock-off Vuitton back in 2008.

Eric Schmidt is sorry he let Facebook walk away with the entire social networking market. The Google chairman and CEO said he knew about the threat several years ago, but didn't address it. Distracted, much?

We were all puzzled by Anthony Weiner's stonewalling of reporters yesterday—refusing to even answer the very basic question of whether the wang in that fateful Twitter picture was his. Now he claims in an interview that even he doesn't know.

Here's a trailer for the American (read: real) version of The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, a movie adaptation of the late Stieg Larsson's hugely popular mystery novel. A redband "bootlegged" trailer popped up over the weekend, but this here is the official one.

Former Godfather's Pizza CEO Herman Cain is doing just well enough in the polls, now, to afford a country music video for his presidential campaign. Look at all of the white conservatives here, trying to show how not-racist they are. They will ride the "Herman Cain Train" with Herman Cain, sure! No problems with that! Race is but a social construct!

Last week, we brought you true stories about life as a Target employee, in honor of the ongoing campaign to unionize the virulently anti-union retailer. Today, we bring you the huge second installment.

Announcing herself this morning on the dual social networking platforms of Facebook and Twitter, pulsating cloud of wishes and light Gwyneth Paltrow has come roaring into the 21st century, ready to conquer the new media world just as she did country music.

A "pal" says Kim Kardashian is pregnant, but the fetus is still smaller than her engagement ring. Blake Lively embraces DiCaprio and denies naked pictures. Kim Zolciak gives birth. Wednesday gossip is spawning.

Lesbians aren't usually known for their promiscuity, but this famous lady who loves ladies certainly is. This actor gets hard during love scenes. This TV star loves GHB. And this celeb is always stepping out on his lady. Is no one faithful?

Debra and Gary were tired of working four jobs just so they could barely afford their mortgage, so they looked back to their days as wild and crazy kids: