Just last year it seemed almost inevitable that genetically engineered Frankenfish would soon be readily available to American consumers. But some lawmakers, like Alaska Sen. Lisa Murkowski, are a little creeped out by the idea and are holding up FDA approval. Murkowski told the AP that the idea of eating Frankenfish "kind of gives me the heebie jeebies."

If you had to think of one thing that stood out on the tenth anniversary of the 9/11 attacks, you would probably say there was a lack of television tributes, right? Funny, because that's how the New York Post sees it, too. Fact-based reporting from the paper:

Gay, anti-Christian, global warming-peddling cartoon Spongebob Squarepants is under attack from old people again, and this time it's from scientists. In the newest edition of Pediatrics, researchers from the University of Virginia found that sticking the kids in front of Spongebob Squarepants so you don't have to actually hang out with them is, in fact, killing their attention spans.

I'm not exactly sure why Jim Carrey walked into a Lower East Side bar called Arlene's Grocery on Friday night and ended up performing the Radiohead song "Creep"—as you'll see, there appears to be a camera crew with him—but I do know that he's a lot better of a singer than I expected. And given the reaction to his video love letter to Emma Stone, Carrey also scores some points for relativity. [via YouTube]

Every day, celebrities across the world are followed and photographed by the omnipresent paparazzi, often to entertaining results. Here are some of our favorite shots from the past week.

Andy Whitfield, the handsome Australian actor who starred in the first season of Starz's gladiator drama Spartacus: Blood and Sand, has died at age 39 from non-Hodgkin Lymphoma, the network confirms.

If you don't have the money for plastic surgery, it's best not to take the home remedy approach. That's what 63-year-old Janet Hardt of Homewood, Illinois, did, and now she's dead! Except the coroner says the rendered beef fat she was injecting around her mouth and chin in a misguided — and delicious! — attempt at reducing wrinkles was not, in fact, what killed her.

JCPenney may have recently yanked a T-shirt from their shelves bearing the slogan, "I'm too pretty to do homework so my brother has to do it for me" — but thanks to Forever 21, girls still have bold, anti-learning fashion options in time for the new school year!

When scientists insert rhesus macaque genes plus jellyfish genes into unfertilized cat eggs, the cats that result post-fertilization are resistant to feline immunodeficiency virus, which causes feline AIDS. They also glow fluorescent green under "special" lights. What if you do this to human eggs?

For the past two years, an Iraqi gangster had a lucrative little auto-theft business going. He'd send one of his men to hail a cab in Baghdad — preferably a new car — and ask for a ride to Dujail. (Dujail is the Iraqi town where Saddam Hussein had 148 boys and men killed in 1982.) When the taxi got to a deserted stretch of road, a group of gang members would appear, kill the driver, bury the body, and sell the car.

Remember when Serena Williams went all Joe Pesci on a line referee at the US Open two years ago? Well, during today's women's final match (which she lost in straight sets to Samantha Stosur), she did it again. Here's a video of Williams' full outburst.

Some students at the College of Charleston in South Carolina are calling for the impeachment of their student body president because he posted super-offensive tweets about other students on the Twitter. But is their campaign driven by morality or revenge? Maybe both! Let's see if we can figure out which party's acting the most assholish here.

These photographs of today's September 11 memorial ceremonies in New York City, Arlington, and Afghanistan speak for themselves. [Image via AP]

Jumpy? Us? On the tenth anniversary of 9/11? Who's jumpy? Oh my god did you hear fighter jets got scrambled to intercept a flight headed to New York this is it we're all going to die oh god

Earlier this week, at least 100 animals died at a Johnson City, N.Y. Petco store due to flooding caused by Tropical Storm Lee so severe that it turned the pet store's parking lot into a pond. Evidence strongly suggests that the deaths could have been prevented.

Having decided that the only embarrassing failure he wants to deal with right now is his football team, Washington Redskins owner Dan Snyder announced that he's dropping his baseless lawsuit against the Washington City Paper. The Redskins still suck. [WaPo]

So these boys in Las Cruces, New Mexico thought it would be clever to get on their Facebooks and "cyberbully" the Zinsations, a local street dance troupe. It was not clever! Because four of the Zinsations beat the shit out of those bullyboys at McDonald's the other day.

The Jacksons had an elaborate escape plan for if Michael had been convicted of child molestation. Amy Smart and Carter Oosterhouse get married. And Charlie Sheen gets roasted. Sunday gossip is getting a tattoo with its BFFs.

Paul Simon was supposed to perform "Bridge Over Troubled Water" at the World Trade Center site today. He did "Sound of Silence" instead, not that we're complaining: NPR's Margot Adler called it "perhaps the most moving moment of the ceremony," and we don't doubt it. (If nothing else, the lyrics to "Sound of Silence" are much better, and arguably more appropriate, at least in the ways that their meanings have changed between 1964 and 2001, and between 2001 and now.)

As if global warming hasn't already done enough for us, guess what we're gearing up for now? That's right: "one of the worst, and longest, allergy seasons yet." Don't worry, we're here to help!