The dumb lawsuit filed by Michigan resident Sarah Deming against the distributors of Drive because it wasn't Vin Diesel-y enough also claimed that the film was anti-Semitic. Specifically, the suit stated that Drive contained "extreme gratuitous defamatory dehumanizing racism directed against members of the Jewish faith, and thereby promoted criminal violence against members of the Jewish faith." If that assertion leaves you scratching your skullcaps, you aren't alone. Luckily, the legal mastermind behind the suit has been quite vocal about what he meant by that language — in the comments section of a movie blog.

It is, it really is! Also today: Matt Damon makes more plans to head behind the camera, a recent literary hit goes to TV, and something about Dallas.

Remember 71-year-old Rita Daniels and her 54-year-old boytoy Tim Adams, who were busted by the cops for having boozy sex in the backseat of her car? Well, they pleaded no contest and were sentenced today.

Here's the type of blatantly contradictory and self-harming political belief that Americans are famous for: during this recession, support for redistribution of wealth has actually gone down. (This is why every American political economist is for shit, historically.) Researchers publishing in Scientific American suggest the problem is that we are willing to throw the poorest members of society to the economic wolves in order to ensure that we always have someone to look down on:

Coffee marketers and morning-show hosts Joe Scarborough and Mika Brzezinski are writing a memoir. Together. Because the fact that you see them on the TV together means that you want to read about them both at the same time! If you'd like to read about them separately, pick up Brzezinski's 2009 already written memoir All Things at Once and Scarborough's 2004 "part memoir, part political treatise" Rome Wasn't Burnt in a Day. Maybe this new one will have awesome sex scenes, or something.

Today the Wall Street Journal chatted with Nicole Williams, who is a "connection director." No, that's not what Heidi Fleiss got put in jail for. Williams works at LinkedIn, the social media equivalent of a "networking event" in a hotel conference room except without the sweaty cold cuts that bald guys are eating with their fingers.

As the dying middle class sees its children swallowed by the student debt bubble as they desperately take out loans to afford college degrees from their likely substandard schools, it's worth remembering the fact that the vast majority of college students in this country are part-timers who will never graduate. You'll never guess how much money we're wasting on remedial English classes! From the LA Times:

Everyone else wanted Steve Jobs to move quickly against his tumor. His friends wanted him to get an operation. His wife wanted him to get an operation. But the Apple CEO, so used to swimming against the tide of popular opinion, insisted on trying alternative therapies for nine crucial months. Before he died, Jobs resolved to let the world know he deeply regretted the critical decision, biographer Walter Isaacson has told 60 Minutes.

Dep. Insp. Anthony Bologna, the NYPD commander whose loose ways with pepper spray caused a stir last month at Occupy Wall Street (and cost him some vacation days), has told colleagues that he "acted with the best intentions" when he sprayed a group of ladies who weren't doing anything at all, and he's been "tortured" ever since.

Things keep getting better and better for Herman Cain, whose latest feat is winning today's Outrage of the Day contest! His poorly worded comments about abortion on Piers Morgan last night have led many to believe that he is actually pro-choice! Well, he's not. He just sucks at speaking.

Someday, when historians try to explain the cultural milieu that led Occupy Wall Street (assuming future people even care about OWS?) they will point to this Wall Street Journal dispatch from a party where Kim Kardashian literally eats cake while discussing the plight of the protest's unwashed masses:

Life can be tough as a celebrity willing to go almost anywhere, with anyone, for money. How do you know if the guy who paid you six-figures to attend his birthday party in Chechnya is a bloodthirsty madman who tortures for sport? Looking that stuff up—and knowing whether to care about it—is hard. That's why two non-profits are teaming up to answer the question: Is the oligarch I'm privately entertaining for money a monster?

Some wacko has been spamming the internet with death threats against the Obamas, and various congressmen, and David Letterman. Google shows this guy's life must be largely spent on writing internet death threats.

As we speak, multimillionaire heiress Meghan McCain is occupying Wall Street and tweeting pictures from the trenches of wealth disparity. See that pile of garbage that separates her from the protesters? That's wealth disparity, materialized.

In your tragic Thursday media column: more info on the companywide layoffs at Village Voice Media, the NYT Co. makes money, a Washington Post heiress has a bright idea, The Economist screws up, and newspaper layoffs are back.

Last month, we started hearing scuttlebutt that Mark Zuckerberg was on the outs with sisters Randi and Arielle. So we approached today's New York Times profile of Randi Zuckerberg with a jaded eye. But we didn't have to read too closely between the lines to find the tension between Facebook's CEO and his older sibling.

Dennis Haskins, the 60-year-old actor who played fun-busting principal Mr. Belding on the unkillable cockroach of a kid's show Saved by the Bell, now makes his living doing nostalgia-laden personal appearances at tacky bars. Times are tough indeed.

House Majority Leader Eric Cantor, who only 13 days ago declared that he was "increasingly concerned about the growing mobs occupying Wall Street and the other cities across the country," appears to have transformed into a radical communist. He's now acknowledging that America's vast income inequality is potentially problematic. He'll flesh out his ideas in a speech tomorrow at that most suffering of institutions, the Wharton School of Business, where most of the people responsible for our income inequality crisis have picked up a degree or two.

Here's a twofer for Washington gossip types: video of Hillary Clinton reacting to an early report that Gaddafi had been captured, which she reads from a Blackberry while a heavily pregnant Huma Abedin hovers over her shoulder. Says the Secretary of State upon reading the news:

The second worst part of flying (after having to take your shoes off at security) is that everyone dresses like slobs. Not Vogue scarecrow-in-chief Anna Wintour. She changed twice for a six-hour flight from New York to L.A. yesterday and even got special treatment at the airport.