Historically, protest movements have always generated iconic music that represents the spirit of the time. The civil rights era gave us "We Shall Overcome." From Vietnam came "For What It's Worth." LAPD brutality inspired "Fuck tha Police." And so forth.

For this week's "What I Wore" personal style column, the New York Times features Park Avenue socialite Muffie Potter Aston, whose life is exactly as you'd guess it would be, based on her name.

Thank God! It had been at least a month or two since House Speaker John Boehner was last seen bawling over, well, anything; we were starting to worry that he was getting his shit together.

Today sees the release of Twilight: Something About Dawn, Part Nine in cineplexes across America and already every American girl between the ages of 10 and 18 has screamed herself hoarse at a midnight screening. But I don't care one lick about this movie or the whole franchise, and here's why.

Oprah Winfrey, she who controls the moon above and the tides below, is leasing her 4,607 square-foot Chicago apartment. That is so many feet for an apartment!

Today is the last day on the air for Regis Philbin, the man with the most hours on camera according to the Guinness Book of World Records. We've been watching the show all month and it's pretty clear that it's his time to go. Have a look at this video—compiled by Gawker intern Roger Cormier—to see just a few of the things Regis got wrong this month alone.

The congressional supercommittee, formally known as the The Joint Select Committee on Failure at Basic Task Execution, is a few days short of its deadline to produce a $1.2 trillion debt reduction plan and not likely to meet its deadline. Onward to the clumsy blame-shifting phase of the show!

What is it with kids these days? In my day, teenagers were all getting pregnant and it was a big crisis, very "punk rock." Nowadays kids are barely having babies at all. Have you kids completely given up?

Vogue's documentation of Lauren Bush Lauren's fantasy pioneer chic wedding has finally arrived on the internet, and it's intense. The Republican heiress married the polo shirt heir at the Lifshitz family ranch in Ridgway, Colorado.

Lady Gaga marks her dressing rooms with urine in surprising places. Jessica Simpson plans to give birth in 4-inch Yves Saint Laurent heels. Rihanna is horny and not getting laid enough. Nicki Minaj wants to use a vibrator in front of children. Friday gossip has needs.

Earlier this week, New Yorkers were shaken and alarmed by a report that Starbucks could be closing some of its restrooms in the city, leaving us all with nowhere to urinate except in Roger Ailes' face. The company denied the report, but this is simply too important of a story to "take their word for it." Now, the New York Times is on the case!

Arianna Huffington pushed out TechCrunch founder Mike Arrington in September, cementing her role as AOL's one true blog master. Now the slow gutting of TechCrunch continues.

This closeted actor set his closeted actor boyfriend on a date with a person of the transgender persuasion. This reality star stole her boyfriend from another man, and this NFL star wants to start fighting for gay civil rights. Finally some gay gossip worth reporting.

Yesterday, news broke of a massive ($500K, allegedly) book deal for 24 year-old Ryan Holiday (pictured)—whose name will be familiar to savvy Gawker readers as the spokesman for American Apparel. So what's so interesting about him?

The New York Post, the pandering tabloid of the fascist power structure, has spared no effort chronicling the most important story of the Occupy Wall Street movement: the presence of some hippie lady of which the New York Post does not approve. Today: the hippie lady villain rides again!

Idaho State University student Ramon Bailey says he made this 20-minute video of accused White House shooter and would-be Obama assassin Oscar Ramiro Ortega-Hernandez after "randomly" meeting him at his gym in September. Among other things, it reveals Ortega-Hernandez to be the anti-beer pong, pro-marijuana Second Coming of Christ. Jesus likes to party organically.

Former Arizona gubernatorial candidate Cary Dolego—who, from a branding standpoint, is kind of like the Herman Cain of the Green Party right now—sold everything he owned to travel to the Ukraine and find a bride. He did not find her!

How many American butts had to develop "hard lumps, ripples, skin discolorations, and infections" before alleged, unauthorized butt enhancer Kimberly Smedley was arrested by federal agents last month? Perhaps we'll never know. But we'll definitely sleep more soundly knowing that America's butts are being protected from her silicone-stuffed syringes.

Unless you're an exhibitionist, you might consider canceling your annual pick-pocketing expedition to Providencia, Chile this year. As this video shows, local townsfolk have adopted a new vigilantism-based strategy to curb purse-grabbing: strip the would-be thief completely naked and leave him in the street. Naked as a jaybird! Naked as a jailbird!

President Obama announced from Bali on Friday that he's sending Secretary of State Hillary Clinton to the human rights disaster zone known as Myanmar, aka Burma, saying, "After years of darkness we've seen flickers of progress." It will be the first such visit to the country, which has long isolated itself from diplomacy, in over 50 years.