Delightfully insane fashion person Karl Lagerfeld is not afraid to formulate patently ridiculous defenses of decadence. Fur is bad and models are too skinny? More like animals are dangerous and girls are too fat!

A couple of weeks ago, teen fashion designer (and Russian heiress) Kira Plastinina announced plans to close "most" of her US-based locations, including the hot-pink branch here in NYC. Today we learn it really is the end of the line: After burning through $80 million of the dairy mogul's cash, the company filed for bankruptcy on Wednesday. But we're pretty sure it's the first time that Bloomberg News has reported on a Chapter 7 bankruptcy filing with a quote from a MySpace page. [Bloomberg]

It's been a rough few weeks for Vogue editor Anna Wintour. There were the rumors that Condé Nast chief Si Newhouse was thinking of replacing her with Carine Roitfeld, the editor of French Vogue. Then there was more concrete evidence of Vogue's fading relevance: The number of ad pages in the magazine tumbled by nearly 10 percent in 2008, a decline more substantial than most of Vogue's competitors. Yesterday, the Times' Cathy Horyn, one of the few fashion writers daring enough to take on the industry's most powerful figure, laid out some of the magazine's problems with a piece entitled "What's Wrong with Vogue?"

• Both retailers and editors are scaling back plans for the couture shows in Paris in January. Anna Wintour, however, will not be deterred. [The Cut]
• A list of 2008's "ubiquitors." [WWD]
• Designer Ted Lapidus is dead at 79. [Guardian]
• The movie about the Bruni-Sarkozy love affair will only air in France, alas. [Style.com]
• A former YSL makeup artist has slapped the company with a discrimination lawsuit. [WWD]
• Tough times: the CEO of Liz Claiborne is forced to fly commercial. [WSJ]
• Did you miss The City? You didn't miss much, but Whitney Port has posted her very own recap, if you're interested. [Celebuzz]

• The City debuts tonight on MTV! New York has details on the goings-on behind the scenes and what Olivia Palermo is hoping to gain from the spotlight: "Like, maybe I'll start a jewelry line,” [NYM]
• Is Christina Aguilera planning to design a collection for Topshop? [Mirror]
• With holiday sales the worst in 40 years, analysts are predicting 73,000 stores may close in the first half of 2009. [Bloomberg]
• Erin Fetherston may have a hotel project in the works. [HC]
• Tom Ford and Judith Leiber have new Rodeo Drive stores planned. [WWD]
• Chanel is cutting 200 jobs. [Guardian]
• The new parent company of Bill Blass says it's planning to revive the brand's high-end collection within "9 to 12 months." [WSJ]
• Dov Charney's American Apparel has another legal mess on its hands. [WWD]

One more unanticipated victim of the meltdown on Wall Street: boldly patterned shirts and ties. It seems that wearing a loud, striped shirt and clashing tie isn't quite as popular now that bankers aren't the big swinging dicks they once were (and yesterday's investment bankers are today's commercial bankers). "When money gets tighter, people refer back to basics," a London tailor tells CNN. Don't think, though, that shirt and tiemakers are going to have any difficulty accommodating the sartorial switch-up. Thomas Pink, you'll be happy to hear, now has 19 different varieties of plain white shirts on sale.

• This will be the bleakest holiday shopping season for retailers in years, but it's not too late to make a bad situation a little bit better. There's still have time to get out there and shop. Do your part and help keep America the consumerist paradise it was designed to be! [AP, WSJ]
• One spot that doesn't appear to be suffering: The Ugg store in Soho. [Racked]
• Kate Moss will appear in an ad campaign for the jewelry brand Fred. [WWD]
• Rock & Republic is planning to launch a new (and cheaper) denim line. [NYM]
• David Chu is parting ways with Tumi. [WWD]
• More job cuts are expected at Liz Claiborne. [WWD]

• Whitney Port explains why she named her new clothing line "Whitney Eve" (it's complicated), and explains why it is that the world really needs another celebrity clothing line. [Nylon]
• The year's best and worst windows, fashion PR stunts, pop-up shops and more. [Racked]
• More on the messy meltdown at Kira Plastinina. [Shophound]
• The recession may be putting a damper on plastic surgery, but injectables like Botox remain as popular as ever. [WSJ]
• It's well worth braving the cold weather and crowds: Panicked retailers "are practically giving the goods away with last-minute sales in a desperate bid to save the so-far-disastrous season from catastrophe." [NYP]

• In what will probably come as soul-crushing news to Arden Wohl, Mischa Barton is launching a line of headbands with Stacey Lapidus. [WWD]
• How do you rope in shoppers during a recession? Staying open 24 hours a day is one popular approach. [WSJ]
• More bad news for retail: As if the recession wasn't painful enough, snowfall during the final days of the season is expected to make things worse. [WSJ]
• Just in case you missed the news, leggings are back. [LAT]
• Tim Gunn has sent out "videotaped personal pleas" to Giorgio Armani and Donna Karan to urge them to stop using rabbit fur from China. [P6]
• Betsey Johnson is not, in fact, planning a diffusion line. [NYM]
• Sorry, folks: Burger King's meat-scented body spray, is sold out. [Racked]

Aliona Doletskaya has been hailed as potential successor to Anna Wintour atop U.S. Vogue. But there's a side of the Russian editor's life you didn't read about in the Times.

Other publishers are cutting back on holiday parties and bonuses, but not Arianna Huffington! It's designer sweaters for her long-suffering employees again this year. So long as they do an advertorial "thank you."

• NYC will be the last stop for Chanel's space-like mobile art pavilion. [WSJ]
• DKNY is the latest brand to bow out of Fashion Week in February. [WWD]
• Narciso Rodriguez's second fragrance debuts this spring. [WWD]
• Rodarte designers Kate and Laura Mulleavy love Pasadena, miss their record collection. [SF]
• Bergdorf Goodman's holiday windows: grotesque or genius? [Racked]

Hey, there's been a huge auto bailout! In this clip, GM execs show up for a press conference in less-than-crisp suits, their way of screwing American taxpayers again (I think). Smug, guys.

It seems that all the apocalyptic predictions of the economic crisis triggering societal breakdown and moral dissolution are coming true! Customers of New York boutiques—we're talking about upstanding, mid-tier designer label-wearing citizens, not hardened criminals or warped celebuspawn—are abandoning their scruples and straight-up lying in order to snag bargains. At the Shoe Box, for example, people have come in saying that Bloomingdales has Uggs on sale when it doesn't (not that we'd expect any better from those still voluntarily wearing Uggs, frankly), or brazenly pretended that Saks has a $535 boot for $150.

• Giorgio Armani is moving ahead with his massive Fifth Avenue flagship, which he says will open on February 18th: "New York needs glamour. It needs size. This store is an act of faith toward the Americans and Fifth Avenue shoppers." [Racked]
• Alice Temperley is the latest designer to announce she's skipping a Fashion Week runway show. [WSJ]
• Tommy Hilfiger, however, is moving to the tents this year, and Max Azria says his three shows will go ahead as planned. [WWD, WSJ]
• Pamela Anderson is the newest model for Vivienne Westwood. [R29]
• Agy Deyn appears in a new, T-sponsored movie. [Fashionista]
• Donna Karan has cancelled her Christmas party. [WWD]
• What it's like to shop at Bergdorf as the wife of a Russian gazillionaire. [NYT]

All Bernie Madoff coverage [Cityfile]

• That was quick. After making a splashy debut in NYC back in May (and after paying Nicole Richie to come to Moscow two weeks ago), 16-year-old Russian heiress/designer Kira Plastinina now says she plans to close most of her 12 locations in the U.S. [FWD]
• In related news, retail sales in Russia are reportedly down 30 to 40 percent. [WWD]
• Coco Rocha's new look. [Fashionologie]
• More on Betsey Johnson's "smaller, friendlier" plans for Fashion Week. [WSJ]
• Sadly, this week is likely the last for Bill Blass. [NYT]
• Kate Moss has re-signed with Topshop for another three years. [Telegraph]

Last week we wondered if First Niece Lauren Bush might want to think about doing something new and exciting with those burlap FEED bags she's carrying around to every party she's attended for more than a year now. We're thrilled to see she seems to have taken our advice to heart: A FEED-branded Baby Bjorn strikes us as the perfect way to demonstrate her concern for both world hunger and little kids. Nicely done! [GoaG, previously]

Ad creep, recessionomics, etc: a beauty company will pay you 100 BRITISH POUNDS to plaster their logo on your eyelid. But you have to wink a lot. Stunty! And unique. Click for bigger pic.

• Anna Wintour has earned a spot on Time's "Top 10 Fashion Faux Pas" list. Congrats! [Time]
• Zac Posen is shelving his plan to launch a secondary line "in light of current economic conditions." [WWD]
• Add Betsey Johnson to the list of designers skipping Fashion Week in February. [WSJ]
• Vera Wang isn't cancelling her show; she's moving it from the tents to her Mercer Street store to "convey a more intimate mood." [WWD]
• Miu Miu has "quietly" shuttered its uptown boutique at 831 Madison Avenue. [FWD]
• A list of the top 10 clothing-related crises in history. [VF]
• More Americans say they're planning to make their own Christmas presents this year as opposed to purchase them. Bad news for retailers, good news for those of you hoping for a knitted cell-phone cover. [Reuters]