Former officials of the U.S. State Department are furiously denying suggestions that retired Secretary of State Hillary Clinton’s extensive use of a private email address violated federal rules concerning the preservation of official government records. A FOIA request filed two years ago by Gawker, however, proves that Clinton—a likely contender for the Democratic presidential nominee—successfully used the off-the-books email account to conceal official correspondence from prying eyes. Ours.

According to a report published by The New York Times Monday night, Hillary Clinton exclusively used personal email while acting as Secretary of State, a possible violation of federal record-keeping laws.

In an entertaining game of wits published yesterday on Medium, writers Virginia Heffernan and Paul Ford spent two months attempting to instill the fear of God in the other with their email subject lines. You know the kind.

When Heba Mohammad, a recent graduate of the University of Wisconsin-Green Bay, emailed Alderman Chris Wery to ask if transportation would be provided for midterm elections in two weeks, Wery immediately called her religious and political affiliations into question—assuming she might have ties to Islamic extremist groups. Because, you know, that's totally normal for an elected official to do.

The first one that arrived was for Kevin, a teenage boy from Port Arthur, Texas:

Not sure what's going on here but Nancy Pelosi seems to be in grave danger. If someone knows Nancy Pelosi can you give her a call or maybe drive past her house to make sure everything is alright? Thanks in advance.

Unions and employers in France have come to an agreement that employees will no longer check their work-related email outside of work hours. The deal—which is legally binding—upholds the spirit of the 35-hour work week that France implemented in 1999.

As Miranda July's celebrity-email-based art project "We Think Alone" winds to a close, a burning question—and possibly a coded message for help—has emerged: What was Kirsten Dunst doing on May 4?

We've all been there. Many, many times.

What's the key to acquiring a quick reply to your email? Make the recipients think that if they do not reply immediately, it will be the final action that tips your day—nay, your life—into an abyss of distressing turmoil. No, it's not clarity, urgency, or brevity that garners replies; it's negativity and pessimism.

A City Councilman in Washington, Pennsylvania, claims he didn't know the city's transit alert system was live when he used it to email a test message informing subscribers interested in public transportation updates that his college friend Bryan "is gay."

It turns out that AOL users are not only confusingly out of date regarding their email service, but also they are more likely to head to a strip club for bachelor party festivities. AOL users account for 25.7% of pre-booked entries to strip clubs. Yahoo users follow with 24.6% and Hotmail after with 21.8%.

It's been happening for a whilllee, texters lengthening their verbage, and linguists are here to analyze. Using nearly 4 million words from students' digital-communications data, a linguist at the University of Toronto has discovered this word elongating practice is a trend most common among female twenty-somethings (though it extends to different ages and across both genders as well). Vowels are the most frequently duplicated letters, and often words are only elongated by two or three letters at a time.

When NYU sophomore Max Wiseltier received an email from NYU's Bursar office last night about a new, electronic tuition form, he wasn't sure what to do so, naturally, he forwarded the email to his mom. "do you want me to do this?" was his exact response. There was one small problem, though; instead of hitting "Fwd" he clicked "Reply all," accidentally sending the message to all 39,979 NYU students on the list.

Are you still waiting on your personalized email from President Bill Clinton thanking you for your donation to his campaign? Unless you're a maverick of space exploration or prevented a major war from escalating, that email isn't coming.

What, you thinking leading the intelligence agency of the most powerful country in the world, and having a boyish grin and a crop of sandy brown hair is only good enough to get you one mistress? The Washington Post fills in some more details on what led to Petraeus's Spyfall, and it looks like it's getting a little Fatal Attraction-y up in here.

Internet nostalgia is having a moment. Animated gifs, AOL Instant Messenger, even the bracing sound of the dial-up modem have all been fondly fetishized as relics of an older internet. Now a slightly more stomach-churning bit of online past can be yours with a custom Goatse email address. The most famous gross-out meme on the internet is back, in a way.

Following this afternoon's report on Arianna Huffington's AOL email account getting hacked, the new media mogul has confirmed the hack and revealed the culprits: Nigerian scam artists. Happens to the best of us.

Early yesterday morning, Arianna Huffington's AOL email address sent a spam hyperlink to numerous people in her address book. It was an email virus, the apparent product of a hack on the AOL News headmistress' personal account.

Backhanded reality TV casting request of the day, culled from a Gawker inbox: