Two hearse drivers, assigned to transporting the body of a Korean and Vietnam War veteran to his funeral in Lecanto, Fla., Tuesday morning, have been fired after they were witnessed stopping at a Dunkin’ Donuts mid-trip.

A 32-year-old woman was found dead inside her SUV in a convenience store parking lot, where she was trying to get some extra sleep between shifts at her four part-time jobs, the New Jersey Star-Ledger reports.

The NYC Dunkin' Donuts location at 37th Street and 8th Avenue has some explaining to do after a video surfaced earlier this week showing a rat just doing rat things on top of some pastries.

Surveillance cameras inside a Florida Dunkin' Donuts store captured footage of two irate customers using a loaded gun to assault an employee because he gave them the wrong kind of coffee.

The scourge of the "cronut" — Dominique Ansel Bakery's mythological hybrid (as in, it's so hard to get one, it might as well be a myth) — has officially gone mainstream.

The Dunkin' Donuts employee who patiently endured the racist tirade of a singularly bad customer will be recognized for his superhuman grace under fire.

Granted, it's only Monday, but there is no way this week is producing a worse human than this Dunkin' Donuts customer who filmed herself demanding free food because she didn't get a receipt.

The very wealthy have been enjoying the Cronut, which is a fancy pastry/donut thing that costs $40 if you can find a Cronut speculator on Craigslist to sell you one of the magical treats. But now the "other half" can have their own donut fad treat. It is a pile of scrambled eggs and bacon inside some glazed donuts.

New York City's ban on the sale of sugary drinks goes into effect on Tuesday, and The New York Times would have you believe "coffee drinkers... are likely to face a thicket of complications." This is wrong. Coffee drinkers—people who drink actual coffee in appropriate amounts—will be fine. Others—people who drink enormous buckets of caffeinated syrup—are likely to be inconvenienced.

A robbery attempt at a Dunkin' Donuts in West Haven, Connecticut, over the weekend was quickly foiled when a rogue employee doused the perp with a cup of hot coffee.

Yes, that's Joe Biden delivering a bag of Dunkin' Donuts and a carton of coffee to a Field Office in Florida. He is wearing a very nice navy-blue blazer with gold buttons, slacks, and a pair of aviators because that is what Joe Biden wears to go pick up Dunkin' Donuts. No, he did not once look this serious during his debate with Paul Ryan.

A Florida robbery may have been prevented if the employee of the targeted store had not been kind enough to lend the robber a pen.

Dunkin Donuts may finally have found the edge it needs to cripple Starbucks and Krispy Kreme: Prostitutes. And also ATM hacking. Just the thing to pump up that stock!

What our fragile economy needs is a white-hot IPO of a famous but mundane consumer food brand! Well it is our lucky day, fellow unfortunate members of the US economy: mediocre donuts are here to save us—again!

Three masked men, "armed with knives and a hatchet," attempted to rob a Dunkin Donuts in Hayannis, Mass. on Wednesday, bursting in through the door and demanding that the cashier hand over a paper bag in her purse. A paper bag filled with donuts.

It's not entirely clear what led Frederick Ladd Wintle, a Republican state legislator from Maine, to believe that a local news photographer might also be a drug dealer who's somehow responsible for killing babies. But it appears that he was wrong, and also wrong about some other things.

Corporations want to get into your phone! The Wall Street Journal reports that Dunkin' Donuts is set to roll out "new mobile technologies in select markets" for smartphones. Exciting! Here are some suggestions for what those mobile technologies should be.

One of the few shows on television hosted by a man with the same name as the beverage sponsoring his show was faced with a crisis today: what happens when guests raise a toast with the competition's product on air?

When you're deciding which fast food franchise to buy into, one to avoid would be Dunkin Donuts, because the muckety-mucks at Dunkin Donuts headquarters will spy on you with video cameras, 24/7.

• Michael Chow has filed suit against Philippe Chow for "unfair and deceptive trade practices, misappropriation of trade secrets, unfair competition, conversion, and trademark infringement," among other things. [NYP, GS]
• A list of eateries that just opened, or will be open soon. [Gothamist, Eater]
• A controversy is brewing over plans to sell food on the High Line. [NYDN]
• Thirteen Dunkin' Donuts locations will change their names this weekend and become part of Tim Hortons, a donut chain that's popular in Canada. [NYT]
• New York magazine's Grub Street food blog is going national. [WSJ]
• Reminder! New York Restaurant Week begins on Sunday. [NY1, NYCGO]