Country music legend/plastic doll Dolly Parton turns 64 today. Chef and TV personality Paula Deen is turning 63. Drea de Matteo (The Sopranos) is 38. Katey Sagal (Married with Children) is 56. Investigative TV journalist Martin Bashir is turning 47. Investing legend Peter Lynch turns 66. Photographer Cindy Sherman is turning 56. Eric Mangini, the former coach of the Jets, is 39. Former Knicks coach Jeff Van Gundy is 48. Comedian Shawn Wayans turns 39. Former Full House cast member Jodie Sweetin is turning 28. And Olympic gymnast Shawn Johnson celebrates her 18th birthday today.

Even the best television shows run out of creative juice if they stay on the air long enough. But, when is the right time to give up hope a show will improve and abandon it forever? Finally, a handy calculation!

Cameron Diaz is a playa, Jessica Simpson drowns her dumping sorrows with friends, Lilo and Sam Ronson engage in an epic fight over Drea De Matteo, Jennifer Love Hewitt and Jamie Kennedy are engaged and Jeffrey Donovan get a DUI.

• Lindsay Lohan and Sam Ronson are tussling once again. This time, Drea De Matteo was involved. And LiLo's clothes ended up in the street. [DM]
• Speaking of troubled young stars, Mischa Barton's rep is denying reports that it was Barton's drug issues that sent her to the hospital. [OK]
• Lizzie Grubman says she was asked recently to join the cast of Real Housewives of New York City, but decided to turn it down. Our loss, clearly. [P6]
• Because fake tanning is an art, Victoria Beckham has retained the services of a "personal spray-on tan artist" to help her "shading appear more natural." [DM]

• Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick took home their adopted twin daughters, Marion and Tabitha, last week. Now they've released a photo of the whole family. Cute! And a nice palate cleanser after all the sordid Michael Jackson news the past few days, no? [People]
• Speaking of grim details from the Jackson case, here's what you may have missed over the last day or so: The doctor at Jackson's house couldn't call 911 for more than half an hour because he couldn't find a working phone (Jackson disconnected them for "privacy reasons); drugs, insiders says, were most likely the cause of death (duh); and Jackson's last will, which dates back to 2002, provided for his kids and mom, but cut his father out completely. [TMZ]

• The father of Mercy James, the girl being adopted by Madonna, says he has no plans to object to the adoption, and a nanny and nurse have already touched down in Malawi to take care of her. So it looks like the little girl will be climbing aboard Madonna's jet to head to NYC any day now. [Reuters, DM, Sun]
• David Carradine's funeral took place in LA on Saturday and more than 400 mourners turned up for the occasion, including Lucy Liu, Michael Madsen, Jane Seymour, Tom Selleck, Daryl Hannah, Lucy Liu, Edward James Olmos, and Rob Schneider. [Us, AP, People]
• Jeff Goldblum, who is 56, and his new girlfriend, 21-year-old Lost actress Tania Raymonde, "can't keep their hands to themselves," which may explain why they've been seen "making out all over town." [AMNY]

• Nailing the elusive 'stripper, Stevie Nicks, musical theater' trifecta, Drea "Adriana LaCerva" de Matteo and her boyfriend Shooter Jennings named their newborn daughter Alabama Gypsy Rose. [Us Weekly]
  

• Candy Spelling wrote an open letter to Paris Hilton about how to turn her life around. Later, Patty Hearst seconded her sentiments. [TMZ]