[David Arquette in Miami with a jiggly pal. Photo via Bauer-Griffin]

Katy Perry boob-gate comes to an end. Some Lindsay Lohan news that should not brighten your Thanksgiving. Everyone loves Prince William. Emma Watson doesn't understand men. Sunday Gossip Roundup will make you think twice about bringing children into the world.

David Arquette is looking for love in all the booziest places. Tony Parker says he wanted to divorce Eva, too. Miley Cyrus meets a boy. TGIFriday gossip.

The Longoria-Parkers face conflicting rumors about adultery and divorce. Pink is pregnant. Stewart-Pattinson probably didn't get married, but Ochocinco will soon. Wednesday gossip is at loggerheads.

[Wacky guy David Arquette dressed up like this for the LA Lakers' Ron Artest's birthday party last night in Los Angeles. Cool, man. Image via Getty]

Charlie Sheen bounces back from last week's cocaine- and hooker-related hospitalization with more cocaine and more hookers. Katy Perry's wedding launched an Indian police investigation. Kim Kardashian faces a Slutoween Sophie's Choice. Halloween's gossip roundup says "Boo!" and "You whore."

The nude woman who got Charlie Sheen hospitalized says he hit her and has hired a lawyer. Billy Ray Cyrus gets a divorce. David Arquette cried during his first post-Courteney sexual encounter. Thursday gossip shall overcome.

Here's a teaser trailer for Scream 4, a continuation of the slasher saga that began fourteen long years ago. We're back in Woodsboro and, in addition to the surviving regulars, we're saddled with a whole new cast of youngsters.

[That actor guy who is now separated from that woman from "Friends" dressed super cool (and spent about ten minutes too long in the tanning bed) for the environment yesterday. Image via AP]

Multiple penis pictures hit the market—will we see West's wang? Katy Perry plans a monochromatic wedding. David Arquette wishes he didn't talk shit about his estranged wife's sex life. Thursday gossip has 20/20 hindsight and bionic penis-vision.

David Arquette is "begging" Courteney Cox to get back together with him. He's so torn up, he called his good friend Howard Stern to talk about it—and dished about their sex lives, "methodical" lovemaking, and extramarital relationships.

David Arquette's rumored mistress is a bar brawling Hollywood mean girl. Courteney Cox ditches her wedding ring. Minka Kelly's mother was a stripper. Al Franken makes an airport security joke. Tuesday gossip sneaks into your bed and steals your husband.

After 11 years of marriage, Courteney Cox and David Arquette have allegedly split.

In a public service announcement to help The OPCC spread the word about domestic abuse, 30 Rock's Jack McBrayer and real-life married couple Courtney Cox and David Arquette don rabbit costumes and go at it like bunnies. [NSFW]

• Marc Jacobs says he's totally over having celebrities at his fashion shows because it's boring, and the only reason Lady Gaga and Madonna turned up to his show last year was because Gaga was performing at the after-party and Madonna, well, she just showed up. "She came backstage, and I was like, 'What do you do with her now?' Because it's not like she was invited." Somewhere, Madonna is burning all of her Marc Jacobs clothing. [P6]
• Rumors have been swirling recently that Ben Affleck fell off the wagon recently and is now drinking again. (He checked himself into rehab back in 2001.) On Monday, a bearded Affleck was spotted "cruising aimlessly" at the Chateau Marmont and "looking worse for wear." Uh oh. [NYDN]
• Tiger Woods mistress No. 1, Rachel Uchitel, has scored herself a job. A day after sitting down with Extra's Mario Lopez for an interview and now the show has hired her as its new nightlife correspondent. Just like hooker-turned-sex columnist Ashley Dupre, Uchitel is proving that you can make a big bunch of terrible decisions in life and come out ahead in the end, provided you have no shame and a burning desire to be famous. [P6]

Billy Joel leaving his building and heading to Nello's (!) for lunch ... Michelle Williams walking daughter Matilda to school ... Blake Lively shopping downtown ... Kelly Ripa and Mark Consuelos attending a Rangers game with their kids ... Courteney Cox arriving at her hotel after an appearance on Regis & Kelly ... David Arquette leaving his hotel ... Kelly Rutherford on the set of Gossip Girl in Queens ... America Ferrera filming scenes for Ugly Betty ... Andy Samberg walking with girlfriend Joanna Newsom in SoHo ... Mary-Kate Olsen and Ashley Olsen leaving ABC after an appearance on GMA ... and Alex Rodriguez walking with Kate Hudson to Serafina to have lunch.

Gisele Bundchen walking down the street just after having lunch at Blue Ribbon yesterday ... Matt Damon heading to the set of The Adjustment Bureau with his wife and daughters ... Naomi Watts carrying a bag of groceries from Whole Foods ... Gerard Butler riding a bike in SoHo ... Samuel L. Jackson shooting scenes for The Other Guys ... Courteney Cox and David Arquette shopping in SoHo and later going to dinner ... America Ferrera filming scenes for Ugly Betty downtown ... Beyoncé and Jay-Z eating at Nello's on Madison Avenue ... Chace Crawford and Blake Lively walking on the set of Gossip Girl ... and Jude Law playing soccer in the West Village with sons Rudy and Rafferty.

Editor Bonnie Fuller turns 53 today. David Carr of the New York Times is turning 53, too. Real estate mogul Howard Lorber is 61. Kerry Kennedy, the daughter of Bobby Kennedy and ex-wife of Andrew Cuomo, is 50. Pink turns 30. David Arquette is turning 38. Singer Aimee Mann is 49. Swimsuit model and former E! host Brooke Burke is 38. Ex-NBA star Latrell Sprewell turns 39. Food writer Amanda Hesser is 38. Former Congressman Mark Foley turns 55. And '90s teen heartthrob Jonathan Taylor Thomas turns 28 today.

Jon, Kate, and the Cabal of 8 hit the streets of New York and their crew's already beefing with people. Also, Robert Pattinson's a shitty tipper, 50 Cent's a shitty real estate buyer, Mischa Barton's sad and crazy. Happy Sunday!

• The Harry Potter frenzy kicked off last night when the latest installment debuted at midnight last night and raked in $22.2 million in the process. [THR]
• Jared Kushner's struggling Observer is still hunting for a new editor. [DF]
• Time Inc. has "assembled a high-level SWAT team" to revamp Fortune. [NYP]
• The most successful magazine at the moment? Fitness. Obviously! [Folio]
• Ukraine's Culture Ministry has banned Brüno because "it's immoral." [THR]
• A hacker accessed the computers of several Twitter employees, made off with a big bunch of documents, and is now leaking the info online. Technology! [TC]
• Is NBC's wacky, new terrorist-hunting reality show going to put war correspondents in danger's way? Guess we'll find out shortly, right? [NYO]