Danny Donaduce has hidden his impressive nunchuck-wielding skills from the world, until now. The video, along with the musical accompaniment of U2, speaks for itself.

A-Rod wanted to do it with Madonna and that's why Kate Hudson broke up with him. Jon Gosselin's freaking out his ex-girlfriends by being Jon Gosselin. Elton john and Eminem, together again. Presenting your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup:

Janice Min, who recently stepped down as the editor of Us Weekly, is celebrating her 40th birthday today. Martha Nelson, the woman who oversees People, is turning 57. Weatherman Sam Champion is 48. Sebastian Stan of Gossip Girl is turning 26. Danny Bonaduce is 50. Author and screenwriter Tom Perrotta is turning 48. Agnes Gund, the former president of the Museum of Modern Art, is 71. Former U.S. Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders is turning 76. And ex-Cuban president Fidel Castro turns 83 today.

♦ Now that she doesn't have Guy Ritchie to boss around, Madonna is finding more time to control everyone else: She's supposedly been "begging" Gwyneth Paltrow to leave her London home so they can spend more time together in New York. She's also busy orchestrating a reunion between Justin Timberlake and Britney Spears: All three will be performing together at Madge's concert in LA tonight. [The Sun, E!]
♦ Padma Lakshmi is apparently on a "man-search" for a filthy rich boyfriend now that her flings with Ted Forstmann and Russell Simmons are over. [P6]
♦ Now that the election is over, Tina Fey says she will be officially retiring her Sarah Palin impression. [Extra]

It's either the best or worst idea in the history of television, but it's no doubt the most contradictory: Set for CMT this fall, Hulk Hogan's Celebrity Championship Wrestling features competitors vying for some kind of reality-show supremacy in the wrasslin' arts, whose tactics they'll apparently learn from judges like Hogan and coaches including former pro stars Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake and Brian Knobbs. But then we had a look at the participants, and really, we wonder if CMT even has to buy insurance for this show:

Some people think that agents, executives and Anthony Pellicano are the most evil people in Hollywood. But watch Vh1's I Know My Kid's a Star for ten minutes and you'll see who the real villains are: Stage parents.

Feeling perhaps a tad emasculated after his shriveled member made the rounds in a naked photo circulated 'round the internets—virtually erasing all memory of his barbaric piledriving of Johnny Fairplay at the Fox Reality Channel Really Awards—Radar notes that Danny Bonaduce has put out feelers to Penthouse editors, hoping he has a chance to redeem himself with a nude spread to accompany an upcoming profile.

We knew it probably wouldn't be long before video of Danny Bonaduce/Johnny Fairplay "fight" at last night's Fox Reality Channel awards show surfaced, allowing us to evaluate Bonaduce's claims of self-defense. After you've had a look at the footage, it should be abundantly clear that Bonaduce was moved to violence solely out of concern for his personal well-being, fearing that the vigorous humping Fairplay inflicted upon his torso might leave unsightly bruises on the abdominals he obviously spends so much time sculpting.

At something called the Fox Reality Channel Really Awards last night, grandmother-exploiting Survivor villain Johnny Fairplay and unkillable Breaking Bonaduce star Danny Bonaduce engaged in a reportedly very one-sided physical altercation on stage, in which Fairplay suffered some lost teeth and a broken toe after being body-slammed by his better-muscled antagonist. (Bonaduce claims the tooth-shattering piledriver was administered in self-defense.) While we haven't seen any leaked footage from the awards ceremony emerge yet—please, Fox Reality Channel, get to YouTubing—TMZ did manage to capture some of the fight's aftermath, where an artful shot of a discarded, bloody tissue hints at the carnage that took place inside.

Page Six columnist Richard Johnson, in LA stumping for the Post, recently did a morning radio show with Danny Bonaduce in which Bonaduce "started right in talking about his drinking days back in New York and how one morning he arrived at his DJ job barely sober, bruised and covered in puke and wondering what the hell happened, only to open up the Post to read Johnson going on about how he was drunk as hell running around in clubs the night before." Bonaduce fired back: "The first target was Johnson's style. He showed up wearing a black Izod golf shirt with a pair of Ray-Ban-style glasses hanging from his neck. 'Hey, Richard,' Bonaduce said, 'the '80s called, and they want their wardrobe back.'...Bonaduce stands 5-foot-skinny to Johnson's more-than-6-foot frame, but that wasn't stopping him from questioning Johnson's sexuality. That didn't go over so well, considering Johnson's both mildly conservative and recently separated. But, then again, Bonaduce's got that silly goatee and is wearing snakeskin bootsso go figure."
NY gossip: The Post's man always rings twice [LA Weekly]