Did Bernie Madoff fuck around and rip off often-shot rapper 50 Cent for millions? Yes, if you believe an anonymous snitch who talked to a website that 50 Cent hates!

Viva Rod Blagojevich! We hope he stays in office forever! Did you know that his little corruption deal was basically his own personal 9/11? Or Pearl Harbor?

A bit of advice: Be nice to the man serving you toro tonight. A 23-year-old Brooklyn man says he was attacked by an out-of-control sushi chef who used his 12-inch "work knife" to "fillet" the man's face after the two got into a traffic dispute. [NYP]

His rocket fetish and bio-weapons research notwithstanding, Silicon Valley venture capitalist Steve Jurvetson is known for funding invention, not producing it. Funny how some illegal Obama sex changed all that.

You know what you don't need when you're under 24-hour lockdown in your apartment? Six cars. The trustee liquidating Bernie Madoff's investment firm has asked a judge to allow him to cancel the leases on six vehicles, including a Range Rover, Cadillac, Lexus and three Mercedes Benzes. Five of the six will go back to dealers in New York City and Long Island; keep an eye out for a 2009 Mercedes S550 that suddenly appears on the lot of Rallye Motors in Roslyn. Odds are it's either black or gray. [Bloomberg]

• Still looking for a place to celebrate the inauguration? You're in luck. A long list of restaurants and bars have special events planned. [GS, Eater, Metromix]
• Newly opened restaurants have been hit the hardest by the recession. [NYT]
• A few more gloomy indicators: High-end eateries are allowing diners to bring their own wine and Daniel will host a beer-tasting next month. [NYP, CNY]
• The dining crime wave may be over: Cops have nabbed two suspects. [NYP]
• Sad news for hot dog fans: The original Nathan's may be forced to close as part of the plan to "revitalize" Coney Island. [NYP]
• Emeril Lagasse will guest-judge the final two episodes of Top Chef. [Eater]

A hedge-fund customer is born every minute. A money manager who promised incredible returns is on the lam. Bernie Madoff? No, it's Art Nadel of Sarasota, whose clients think he stole $350 million from them.

We've all wondered what drove Bernie Madoff to (allegedly) commit his crimes. Was he an obsessive-compulsive narcissist? Just greedy? One factor we didn't consider: genetics. Fortune reports this afternoon that Bernie wasn't the first member of his family to run afoul with the authorities. A broker-deal registered to Bernie's mother, Sylvia Madoff, was shuttered by the SEC more than 40 years ago for failing to file financial records with the agency. Strangely, acquaintances of the family don't recall Mrs. Madoff working as a broker, which would have been highly unusual for a woman at the time, and the firm, Gibraltar Securities, used the Madoff family house in Queens as its mailing address. (Fortune suggests the firm was used as a front by Bernie's father, Ralph.) Unless Bernie or his brother address the matter, it's unlikely we'll ever find out since both Sylvia and Ralph Madoff died in the 1970s. But for prosecutors scouring the globe for Madoff's illicit gains, perhaps it's just the clue they've been looking for! The tiny British colony of Gibraltar is one of the world's most notorious tax havens. [Fortune]

Bernie Madoff's financial scam gets more impressive by the day. How long do you think he was defrauding people? Five years? Fifteen years? How about, oh, 40 years or so:

Boy George is going to jail. For a year and change. He handcuffed a hooker to his wall and then threatened him with sex toys and whips.

We all know Bernie Madoff scammed people out of billions, for years. What about his immediate family members, who were all working for him? Essential facts below:

Just because Raffaello Follieri is sitting in a prison cell doesn't mean his legal troubles are over. Yesterday five former employees told a judge that the fraudster cheated them out of $1 million in wages that were promised to them back when Follieri's firm was "working with" the Vatican on "real estate deals." Anne Hathaway's ex wasn't in the courtroom to respond to the allegations; he participated via video hookup from Pennsylvania's minimum-security Loretto Federal Prison Camp. The worst part: the former Prada aficionado had to wear a green prison uniform for his TV appearance. Sounds miserable, doesn't it? If you're beginning to feel sorry for Raffi—or you happen to have some extra time on your hands today—perhaps you'd be interested in cheering him up with a belated holiday card? Be our guest! Raffaello's contact info is below.

[Ponzi ponce Bernie Madoff arrives at Manhattan Federal Court today for a bail hearing (Update: He's not going to jail) , wearing a bulletproof vest; image via Splash]

Bernie Madoff just left for court for a 2:30 bail hearing. Media mayhem ensued! Police on the ground! Helicopters in the sky! A financial charlatan's drive to court is cable news' OJ car chase, 2009.

A judge denied an appeal by federal prosecutors to revoke Bernie Madoff's bail and send him to jail pending trial. He should be back at 133 East 64th Street for afternoon tea. The judge did impose several new bail requirements, however: Madoff's possessions at each of his various homes around the world—not just his NYC apartment—will now be inventoried. Looks like a lucky federal employee is getting a free trip to St. Tropez! [Bloomberg]

Bernie Madoff left his apartment a couple of minutes ago to head downtown to Manhattan federal court. (Unfortunately, the windows of his SUV were covered up, so the dozens of reporters freezing their butts off outside 133 East 64th Street, were once again denied a photo op.) He'll find out where he will be sleeping tonight when he faces a judge at 2:30pm.

Marcus Schrenker, the accused Indiana insurance swindler who staged a plane crash, nearly ended his life as dramatically as he fake-ended it this past weekend.

At least Schrenker has shown some spunk and swagger in trying to escape financial fraud — unlike, say, Bernie Madoff, the $50 billion Ponzi schemer whose idea of flirting with danger seems to be mailing $200 mittens.

How many financial fraudsters are on the run, or at least appear to be? At least two as of this afternoon! There's Marcus Schrenker, the financial adviser accused of defrauding investors through three of his companies, who tried to fake his death over the weekend by bailing out of his plane (which crashed in a Florida swamp) before taking off on a red motorcycle. Schrenker remains missing—some suspect he may have fled the country—but if he gets caught, he'll have quite a movie to sell to Hollywood, won't he? Schrenker isn't the only crook to have mysteriously disappeared. Robert Jaffe, the Bernie Madoff middleman from Palm Beach, who, last we heard, was selling off his wardrobe to a consignment store, failed to show up at a meeting with Massachusetts regulators today. There isn't an arrest warrant for Jaffe yet. ("What happens now is yet to be determined," says an official.) Let's hope that changes. It isn't every day that you get to see a police car chase a vintage green MG through the streets of Palm Beach.

Yesterday $50 billion thief Bernie Madoff won the right to stay home on house arrest. And the public might not even get the satisfaction of a trial; Bernie is reportedly seeking a plea deal.