Another day, another reason to adore Cougar Queen Susan Sarandon. Sure, these quasi-shocking revelations about one of Hollywood's most respected actresses are intelligently being released just as her next film Speed Racer guns for a second place B.O. finish, but if we thought the 61-year old's new tattoo was cause for celebration, consider her recent discussion involving How To Talk To Your Kids About Drugs:

Ever since our first viewing of the Rocky Horror Picture Show, we have adored and idolized Susan Sarandon as both an actress and an icon. And her recent decision to get the mature woman's version of a tramp stamp on her upper back only serves to heighten our girl crush. Despite being located on her back, the tattoo in question is far from trampy: Sarandon decided to intertwine the first letters of each of her three children's names in sky blue script. As for her reasoning behind the spontaneous ink, "Why not? I turned 60 and after a while you think, 'Well I've only got my body for a few more years anyway'." A closer look at the new tat, and why Susan chose body art over "that burn victim" look other stars go mad for these days, after the jump.

Former BFFs Heather Locklear and Denise Richards have each enjoyed watching the other's respective star status fall farther with each passing year, but the good news is they both share something in common to smile about. While it's not exactly an Emmy, they both look hot in bikinis. Heather's gone from starring in a hit primetime drama and being the object of many a male fantasy to her current role in a Lifetime movie about women over 40 or something. And Denise? Well, after impressing nearly every male on the planet with her pouty lips and lesbian pool antics in Wild Things, she earned the title of Mrs. Charlie Sheen (quite an honor, indeed). Now? She's filming some kind of reality show that no one cares about. What do we care about? Who looks better in their red bikinis, and who's the better surfer! Judge for yourselves after the jump:

Click to viewBarbara Walters appeared genuinely confused when the subject of cougars came up on The View today: "What is a cougar woman?" she asked, wondering aloud if Demi Moore was one. Her sassy young cohosts proceeded to school her on the subject of, ahem, older women who hunt younger men.

You think you have mommy issues? Meet Alexander, a 23-year-old teacher who just barely eked his way into a Thursday speed dating event at 230 Fifth featuring wealthy 35+ women all of whom had to show proof of at least $4 million in liquid assets or divorce settlements. Classy enough for you? Okay! As Dealbreaker tells it, Alex felt the $50 entry fee for "A Speed Date for Rich Women and Hot Men (Sugar Mamas and Boy Toys)" was a little steep, so he planned on skipping the whole sordid affair. His gross cougar stepmother was having none of that, so she called up the event's coordinator to strong-arm the guy into letting her cheapie stepson in. We got our hands on the voicemails. Take a listen to the first-we've removed identifying phone numbers to protect the twisted:
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The motivation for this selfless act of advocacy? After the jump, listen as many times as you like!

"Cougars." Ladies "of a certain age" cruising for young men. Often used on obnoxious television comedies, by fratty assholes, and on the internets. And Time Out NY would like to know where, exactly, to find them!

Breaking! Press release reveals sassy, matching cougar/canine fashion at local Sex and the City movie shoot! "FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: Kim Cattrall and her pooch are stylish in matching Nancy Gonzalez during the filming of Sex and the City
December 17th, 2007 - Kim Cattrall stepped out on the streets of Los Angeles while filming a scene from Sex and The City carrying a Nancy Gonzalez handbag. Kim Cattrall' s dog is wearing a one of a kind matching Nancy Gonzalez collar and leash made especially by the designer for the dog."

There is something about being in novelist Erica Jong's apartment that makes a person feel a certain degree of—how to put this?—sexual license. Maybe it is to do with the enormous Tom Wesselmann nude that greets visitors in the foyer, all big lips and blonde hair contrasting with dark pubes. Maybe it is just knowing that you are in the home of the lady who coined and, you know, engaged in "the zipless fuck," even for those who could only have the thrill of discovering 1973's Fear of Flying on their parents' bookshelves. Maybe it is that Erica herself is such a hot tamale! In any event, something made me feel like it would be okay to go up to British author Ken Follett and start telling him my dirty secrets right off the bat. Photographer Kathy Lo was the youngest person there by at least five years.

The New York Post has really taken Ed Klein's talking points from his Katie Couric bio to heart: "Katie Couric has gone from a cougar to a dove. The 'CBS Evening News' anchor with a penchant for dating younger men has come out criticizing the war in Iraq—and her predecessor, Dan Rather." See? She's a nutty hussy! After her husband died, she dated more than one person! So she can't possibly have any of these wildly radical opinions like "people in this country were misled in terms of the rationale for this war." Someone should totally dunk that communist traitor witch and see if she floats!

Next week sees the release of Edward Klein's "Katie: The Real Story" (Crown), a biography of "CBS Evening News" anchor Katie Couric. Klein's previous biography was the Hillary Clinton hatchet job "The Truth About Hillary Is That She Eats Box," and the Couric book follows the same pattern: it's full of rumor, innuendo, and scurrilous information from anonymous sources. Since the stuff about Katie being a bitch to work for has already been all over the papers, let's just jump to the sex parts! Here, the newly-installed anchorwoman meets a much younger man and damages feminism forever.

Every month we get a box of Haute Living magazines, a rich man's Real Estate section. During the winter we use these boxes for kindling and during the summer months we use it to prop open the door. Sometimes, on a slow news day, we open them. The pages are purposefully high gloss as to safeguard the manicured fingerpads of the readers (matte chafes). And the articles are fawning paeans to the city's high-end developers. This month, the "women of substance" column features a particular catch. She looks like Chloe Sevigny, wrote a thesis on Dostoevsky and is developing that crazy doctor's blown up townhouse on Upper East Side. Ladies and gentlemen, meet Janna Bullock.

This afternoon, as Book Expo America begins, Tina Brown and Doubleday hosted a luncheon at MoMA's The Modern to celebrate the release of The Diana Chronicles. In the back room, like dwarves, each of the seven tables came with an adorable author of note. Ian McEwan, Kate Christensen, Jeffrey Toobin, Sebastian Faulks, Valerie Martin and Dan Wallace were the literary set pieces and their books, except Brown's (it's still unpublished, though excerpts will be in next week's Vanity Fair), were liberally distributed throughout. We counted two seersucker suits and more than one pair of Converse. The group could choose between sea bass with coco beans and spring vegetables "au pistou" or beef strip loin with morels, wilted lettuce and yukon gold salad. Tina Brown was fashionably late.

Women of a certain age in this town hardly need to be informed of the lip-plumping, wrinkle-eradicating properties of non-animal-sourced hyaluronic acid, rendering this viral campaign for Restylane (thanks, helpful publicists who believe our readers would be interested in their client's miracle product) all the more bizarre. Maybe their market research has revealed that middle-aged producers' wives who've recently been discarded in favor of twentysomething assistants frequently hunt for anonymous revenge-sex on the YouTubes and the MySpaces, where they might stumble upon the ad dramatizing the kind of liberating, youth-restoring cougar-maulings they'll enjoy once the initial swelling and bruising of their first round of injections subsides.