Barack Obama is on a college kick this week, urging "disengaged" students to turn out for midterm elections. (Most college students don't know what these are.) Can he energize these jaded hippies, who loved him so much in 2008?

Harvard was planning to let New Republic editor Marty Peretz speak at an upcoming 50th anniversary event for some social studies program. But then Peretz wrote racist nonsense on his blog, again! Harvard kids protested, and now Peretz won't speak.

We all know by now that a college degree is not really worth getting. Or is it? There are enough arguments on both sides of this issue to make everyone mad. Come, explore—it's cheaper than a college class!

A student wearing a bullet-proof vest cut the throat of a dean at Kansas City's Metropolitan Community College-Penn Valley today, before a press conference where Missouri's governor was expected to speak only minutes later. The dean is still alive.

Today we looked at a ridiculous study that declared Cambridge in England a better school than Harvard in the US. Bollocks! Utter bollocks. Or so we thought, until one commenter came and set us straight. Cambridge really is the best.

Rev. Mark Gruber, a Benedictine monk and former professor at Saint Vincent's College, was fired last year after the school accused him of downloading underage gay porn on a shared computer. Did the school knowingly accuse an innocent man?

A New York Times article this morning examines the latest iteration of an age-old problem for the Democratic party: getting young voters to give a shit about politics between presidential elections. Are these kids already bored with the "Democrat" fad?

Today we looked at parents unable to leave their children alone at college. This got many of you telling your own stories of leaving the nest, with one in particular delighting and intriguing.

Among the first things we learned about bizarre South Carolina Senate candidate Alvin Greene after his fluke nomination was his pending obscenity charge, for sending porn to some college gal. Now he's been indicted, hurting his non-existent prospects for victory.

The political world recently learned about Kentucky Senate candidate Rand Paul's college secret society exploits, like when he "kidnapped" a woman, offered her pot, and made her worship a false idol. But the woman now insists, it wasn't a "kidnapping."

Kentucky Senate candidate Rand Paul — the one who's scared of Meet the Press — had such an exciting college experience. Once, he kidnapped a lady and forced her to take "bong hits" and worship a water god. Kids!

A study has compiled a list of the top college majors that lead to low pay. Shockingly, if you major in art or religion or social work, you will never make any money ever and die a penniless, miserable idealist.

If you cringe at one thing today, let it be this freshman orientation video from UGA. Forcing their students to sing this awful song is one thing, but butchering Miley Cyrus' "Party in the USA"? Some crimes are unforgivable.

Today we looked at college presidents and how they all want to be really cool. Many of you shared stories of college presidents you knew way back when. One of them in particular struck a chord with us.

In this, the year 2010, the University of Texas at Austin is starting to think about changing the name of a student dormitory that is named after a prominent member of the Ku Klux Klan, William Stewart Simkins. [CNN; pic]

The Times today explores the trend of high schools naming more than one person—as many as ten!—their Valedictorian. Some people are worried that this might dilute the honor of being named high school valedictorian, which is akin to worrying that water might dilute the bottle of urine someone is forcing you to drink.

NYU's brand-new Abu Dhabi-based "sister school" will open its doors this fall to a class of 150 irritating overachievers. Poor Abu Dhabi. What is it getting itself into?

And by "beat up" we mean slapped at weakly and then called poor. A young Oregonian actually named Yale W. Fan has decided to attend Harvard over his namesake next year. The exciting story is here, you fucking nerds.

The Talented Mr. Wheeler—Harvard student Adam Wheeler, who got in by lying on his application and now faces criminal charges—was accepted to join Stanford for the 2010-2011 academic year. Obviously, they have since changed their minds. [AP]

Dogs and babies are the only creatures that vomit more than college freshmen do. Allowing dogs in dorms, then, is dangerous, but it's happening anyway. Come, witness a terrible world where week-old pizza in the common room contains dog turds.