Looks like the royal baby will have zero time to recover from its swim through the English Channel of amniotic fluid before doing battle with its first foe: a giant Loch Ness monster version of Colin Firth that has just been plunked down in Serpentine Lake in Hyde Park, London.

Among a certain set of young women, just the mere mention of actor Robert Pattinson is enough to elicit uncontrollable shrieks and gurgles. Seriously? This guy? What the hell is wrong with you, ladies?

Here's a video of the real stammer-filled speech King George VI gave at the opening of the British Empire Exhibition. It's similar to the speech that begins the Oscar-nominated movie The King's Speech. How faithful was the adaptation?

Today at Gawker.TV, last night Stephen Colbert dedicated his hair to Keith Olbermann while Craig Ferguson dedicated his monologue to him and this morning, the Today Show interviewed Colin Firth and James Franco one-after-the-other with fairly disastrous results.

You know, the one that irked James Franco so badly when he gave his interview to Matt and Meredith right afterwards. Meredith offers her extra-friendly services by telling Firth "when you get the statue, I'll polish it for you." Zing!

Today James Franco gave a remote interview from school in Connecticut. After being forced to listen to the anchors interview Colin Firth in his ear before his interview, he called Matt and Meredith out on the faux-pas. It. Is. On.

It's true! Though this holiday weekend isn't technically over, we do have a good idea of how the box office cookie crumbled, and it seems as though Seth Rogen has emerged victorious. Poor Vince Vaughn.

Here's a trailer for The King's Speech, the British prestige drama that recently won the Toronto Film Festival and is about... a king with a stutter. That's it. But, you know, it's set against the backdrop of WWII and stuff.

Kate Winslet will play a single mother. Taylor Lautner is causing fights. Twilight gets sliced in two. Kevin Costner? He's just chillin', starring in a new WWII pick. The Roundup just won $5 on a scratch ticket. It's buying another!

The star of Tom Ford's directorial debut, a gay love story that's out today, says he's unhappy about the Weinstein Co's efforts to "sanitize" the gay content of the film in the trailer and promotional posters to widen its appeal.

That's the normal reaction when Hugh Grant touches your butt, right? Rachel Uchitel finally goes to the press, Rihanna wants to make out with Megan Fox, Ben and Jen mate like bunnies. Wednesday gossip, yours for the taking.

We were not invited to the star-studded New York screening of A Single Man or the afterparty at Monkey Bar last night. Somehow fictional freelancer Betsey Morgenstern wrangled her way in. Here is her report.

Based on the trailers and posters, A Single Man, the first film from former Gucci designer Tom Ford, looks amazing. It also looks like a straight love story. Why is he misleading the audience about this piece of queer cinema?

We may not have anything left of our environment or economy by 2010, but at least we'll have something to keep us interested in the cinema. And the marketing machine is already starting. Check out the coming attractions!

Bill O'Reilly is celebrating his 60th today; we're counting on you, Keith Olbermann, to make sure O'Reilly's big day is a very special one. Fashion designer Karl Lagerfeld is turning 76. Just in time for Fashion Week, model Coco Rocha is turning 21. Movie director (and Madonna ex) Guy Ritchie turns 41. Ryan Phillippe is turning 35. Actor Colin Firth is 49. Golfing legend Arnold Palmer is 80. Aerosmith guitarist Joe Perry is 59. The Post's Keith Kelly is 55. And NYC nightlife veteran Tracy Westmoreland celebrates his 53rd birthday today.

Free Arts NYC hosted its 10th annual art and photography auction last night. Attendees at the Calvin Klein Collection-sponsored event, which was hosted by Kevin Bacon and Michelle Monaghan, included Calvin Klein's Francisco Costa and Italo Zucchelli, Amy Sacco, Glenda Bailey, Julia Restoin Roitfeld, Hilary Rhoda, Ed Westwick, Lindsay Price, Karolina Kurkova, Yvonne Force Villareal, Zani Gugelmann, Kimberly Guilfoyle and Eric Villency, Thom Browne, Molly Sims, Andrew Saffir, Beth Ostrosky, Erin Fetherston, Mary Alice Stephenson, David Granger, Helen Lee Schifter, Glenn O'Brien, Kate Schelter, Richard Chai, Jeremy Kost, Mickey Boardman, Kathryn Neale, Ross Bleckner, Simon de Pury, and Andrew Fry. [PMc, Wireimage, FWD, SF]

♦ The first looks from Thakoon's Target collection are online, and they're very Talitha Getty. [Nylon]
♦ Stay far away from 52nd and Fifth this evening, unless you want to catch the desire to wear candy-colored velour: Pamela Skaist-Levy and Gela Nash-Taylor are throwing a launch party for Juicy Couture's new store. [Page Six]
♦ It's not only Lindsay Lohan who has seen the potential in leggings: The spring lines from labels like Rodarte and Threeasfour feature printed, cut-out or slashed leggings. [stylefile]
♦ Fashion designer Lisa Perry, lover of all things '60s (and wife of hedge funder Richard), is opening a store in SoHo tomorrow. [The Daily]

It's been three years since Tom Ford announced plans to
make movies, but it looks like Ford will soon get a chance to take a seat in a canvas (gasp!) director's chair and scream at terrified PAs on the set of a major motion picture. His production company, Fade to Black, is set to start filming A Single Man in Los Angeles early next month, starring Colin Firth, Julianne Moore and Matthew Goode. [WWD]

♦ The first painting of Kate Moss ever to be sold at auction—"a self-portrait in lipstick marked with her own lip prints and stains of her former boyfriend Pete Doherty's blood"—is expected to go for between £30,000 and £40,000 in London on Saturday. Meanwhile the subject of an upcoming show at Les Arts Décoratifs in Paris will be "the Kate Moss myth" in advertising. [Telegraph, WWD]
♦ Video of the new Prada collection (and models falling on the runway) from the show in Milan earlier this evening. [NYT]

♦ Samantha Ronson refused to DJ an event at Rubyfruit, allegedly because she doesn't spin at gay or lesbian bars. Her rep, of course, denies this. [P6]
♦ David Spade didn't turn up at Eric Trump's charity golf tournament in New Jersey last week because he thought it was taking place at Trump's LA course. [P6]
♦ An Atlantic City monsignor wants his name added to the list of Raffaello Follieri's victims. He says he gave the Italian playboy $110,000 because Raffaello said he needed the funds to pay some nuns. [NYDN]
♦ MTV has finally confirmed Whitney Port's Hills spinoff. It will begin airing in early 2009. [E!]
♦ How exciting! Mike Bloomberg will become an honorary citizen of Tbilisi, Georgia tomorrow night. [P6]