Most guys have probably guessed that mainstream clothing companies are a little bit... generous with their measurements. But they probably haven't guessed how generous. The Dockers 36-inch waist? Actually 39.5 inches around. And they're not even the worst offenders.

It's hot outside! And yet, thanks to "society," you still have to wear clothes. The New York Times thinks you should do things like wear linen. Whatever! We have better ideas.

Japan's embattled Prime Minister Yukio Hatoyama, sitting on a 24% approval rating at home, may have done himself in by wearing a multi-colored plaid shirt that has pissed off the entire country. That, and his wife is totally nuts.

[Kobe Bryant, here dressed as a color-by-number gentleman farmer, is likely to spend the next few weeks wondering what he was thinking when he agreed to a photo shoot with the L.A. Times Magazine.]

Simple patriotic pornographic clothing firm American Apparel is beset by trouble! Now the SEC is investigating the company. Because of fishy leaked emails. Which we have for you, below!

Is America ready for fashion endorsements from regular people? To clarify, "regular" means "A person who is famous in some way, but not pretty." It's a heartwarming concept, but the answer is "no." Americans will never relinquish our devotion to models (though we have been known to tolerate slightly less anorexic models). But! What if said "regular person" is the woman who spawned superhuman American fish hero Michael Phelps? Still no: Debbie Phelps, Michael's mom, has signed a six-figure endorsement deal with Chico's, the company that made most of the clothes she wore in the stands at the Olympics. Michelle Obama is also on the record as a Chico's fan!

At left is the launch of internet gossip monster Perez Hilton's clothing line at Hot Topic in Hollywood last night. Aw, poor Perez. No one showed up to meet him! An eyewitness reports: "Some freaky lil employee with a handful of wrist bands asked if I wanted to meet Perez Hilton at 6pm! I was like NO, I just ate. NO one wanted wrist bans [sic] it was kinda funny." More photos of the sad, sad, sad event after the jump.

Oh man. Not only are the ladies of Sex and the City shallow and screechy and four years older, the fashion icons can't even dress themselves anymore! "[I]n the film the characters are now four years older and, in a disappointing way, their styles appear to have changed into one: the offbeat, orgiastic, do-it-yourself madness of Carrie, the dominant female. It is not only that they now dress alike. In every scene the women are practically coordinated by both color and style, as if they had received a morning memo detailing the day's dress code. Let's all wear primary colors to a jewelry auction! Let's all wear psychedelic hippie dresses on a trip to Mexico! Let's all wear smart black-and-white ensembles and fur coats to a fashion show!"

Continuing the grand tradition of completely useless people having clothing lines, Perez Hilton will soon be rolling out his own collection of women's t-shirts, hooded sweatshirts, and other bric-a-brac. The corpulent celebrity blogger says that because he covers fashion disasters on his website, he has "a good eye for what's hot and what's not" (right) and that he's trying to expand the "Perez Brand." Can Perez Hilton wine be far behind? (Please click that link). Click through for some Guanabee inspired examples of Perez's fashion savvy.