In the mood for some class rage? (Of course you are.) Gothamist points us to message board on uptight parenting forum UrbanBaby asking, "What's your hhi [household income] and do you FEEL poor, middle class, upper middle class or rich where you live. No judging."

You know those fancy elevators where you type your destination on a keypad, and then it groups riders into specific cars for maximum efficiency? They are increasingly used to segregate the unwashed masses from their corporate bosses, The Wall Street Journal reports.

Four 10th graders from St. Ann's—NYC private school to Brooklyn's brownstone elite—have been arrested for setting fire to a public school's playground, melting the slide. Class rage meter: 5%

Airplanes are the worst places to meet celebrities. The cramped environment of an upholstered metal tube brings out the worst in every tantrum-throwing, assistant-berating diva. The only thing worse than a tantrum? Insufferable, yoga-enhanced calm!

The top 25 hedge fund managers pulled in a total of $25 billion in 2009, according to Absolute Return+Alpha. That's a record. It's good to know that the economy has recovered and we're firing on all cylinders again.

Yes, the private sector axed another 23,000 jobs this month, but don't worry because Wall Street is hiring again! According to Time, 75% of Wall Street firms intend to put new college grads on the payroll this year.

It's bonus season, so we're trying to keep up with how Goldman Sachs employees are spending their taxpayer-financed windfalls. Today's entries: A $6 million penthouse condo, and adding a new floor to the upper-east-side historical landmark in which you live.

Barack Obama is turning into a fiery populist! He is a regular Huey Long out there, promising to give the masses whatever they want. As long as what they want is "automatic opt-out contributions to retirement plans."

Happy Goldman Sachs Bonus Day! As we mentioned earlier, Goldman announced today that its 2009 bonuses will total $16 billion, spread (very unevenly) among its 32,500 employees. We thought we'd take a look at how they spend our money.

Goldman Sachs announced its 2009 earnings today, and the news is bleak: While the firm took in a record $13 billion profit, it's only paying out a lousy $16 billion in bonuses, the stingiest year-end bump in the firm's history.

The gross domestic product fell one percent last quarter. What does that mean?

Newsweek has declared the end of the Great Recession, which is great news for the 15 million unemployed people. Or is it? Because the magazine has also cobbled together an online only feature on how "fun" the Great Depression was.

Little public figure Charles Stam was the villain of New York Magazine's cover story on the terrible nonsense that goes on at tony prep school Horace Mann. Stam harassed a teacher for being a liberal feminist, and even lied about having a tape of her calling him a Nazi in an attempt to get her fired. He was promptly elected student body president! We posted a small picture of him from the Horace Mann yearbook earlier this week, and that made Stam sad. He emailed Gawker boss Nick Denton to ask that we remove his "personal material" from the site. Instead, we will reprint his email. It's after the jump, along with the sad tale of school head Thomas Kelly's toxic waste playground for the poor kids, and why it's all Eliot Spitzer's fault.

So you read the New York cover story about the mess at high-falutin' private prep school Horace Mann, but maybe you wanted more. Maybe you wanted to meet the faces behind the names. You are in luck, kind reader. With help from SECRET GAWKER SOURCES we found photos and bios for two of the anonymous rich assholes who gave the story its depressing color—the wealthy trustee mom whose daughter inadvertently engineered the whole scandal, and "Jeffrey Robbins," the Young Republican anti-Max Fischer who rose from liberal-baiting history class gadfly to misogynist class president. After the jump, meet the leaders of tomorrow!

Andrew Trees—the teacher fired from Riverdale's tony Horace Mann School in January and the author of Academy X, a novel satirizing life inside an elite private school very much like Horace Mann!— filed suit today in Bronx County's New York State Supreme Court. He charges the school with breach of contract and defamation. Trees has been awful quiet since his firing—now we know why!

Dr. Andrew Trees, the author of a roman a clef about posh Riverdale prep school Horace Mann, remains fired from that institution. But his friends and former colleagues have rallied together on his behalf! Over 60 academics signed a letter to the editor of the Horace Mann Record—which was then prevented from publishing the letter by head of school Tom Kelly. Even new Record editor Elyssa Spitzer (yes, that's Eliot's daughter!) could not sway the discourse in the direction of free speech. The unprinted letter is after the jump.

In this week's issue of The Record, the student newspaper of the posh Riverdale prep school where all our bosses' bosses send their offspring, there's a very inspiring paean to free speech. It concerns Dr. Andrew Trees, whose "forced departure," according to letter-writer and fellow faculty member Dr. Peter Sheehy, "raises serious questions for us as an academic institution." It sure does! Questions like, "Why'd they fire him now, and not when his Horace Mann-slamming roman a clef came out last year?"