Please Tip! [Flickr]
Related: Wall Street's Neediest: We're Lending a Helping Hand [Cityfile]

Many companies have been busy cancelling their holiday parties in recent weeks. But if your firm is still searching for a little entertainment to spice things up (and you're not interested in having a losing contestant from Top Chef make an appearance), here's one more option to add to the list. Donald and Allison, who operate a site called SopranosLookalikes.com and claim they served as James Gandolfini and Edie Falco's photo doubles on the HBO show, say they still have some availabilities for upcoming holiday events. The couple promises to offer up quite a show if you hire them. They'll happily meet and greet your guests, "present awards," and "do toasts." They're also willing to "argue with each other" and "Tony can humiliate those you want made an example out of," which, come to think about it, might come in handy if the CEO of your company just slashed the budget and fired a big bunch of people.

A collection of all 53 issues of Visionaire—the super-expensive, super-glossy fashion/art mag founded by Stephen Gan—went up for auction last night at Sotheby's in London, but failed to find a buyer. [Unbeige]

We're not sure why execs at the New York Stock Exchange decided to invite a man best known for breathing fire and spitting blood to ring the opening bell this morning. But they did, and Gene Simmons dutifully turned up, and the Kiss rocker concluded his visit by chatting with Fox Business. The "market expert" (Fox's words, not ours) isn't too worried about the recession, you'll be relieved to hear. He's downright bullish! "You know what I'm doing down here? I'm buying. Because the Dow is around 8,000. Guess what? It's going to go to 10,000 before you know it!" Watch the full video for more of Gene's thoughts on the bailout, the state of the U.S. auto industry, and our dependence on Mideast oil.

♦ Less than a week after it was reported that Justin Timberlake had gone into contract on a fifth-floor condo at the Pearline Soap Factory in Tribeca, the pop star has already closed on the deal. According to property records, Timberlake picked up the three-bedroom condo for $4.774 million, nearly half a million less than the asking price of $5.25 million. (He purchased the pad via an LLC called Just Us I.) You can see photos of his new place here. [Cityfile]
♦ Fortress Investment Group co-founder (and former billionaire) Randal Nardone has closed on a "glass-walled duplex skyhome" at 101 Warren Street for $22 million, more than a year after going into contract. [NYO]

The name Candy Pratts Price won't be familiar to the average person in the street, but the executive fashion director of Style.com has been one of the most important people in the fashion biz for several years now, as the hyperbolic testimonies gathered by the Transom at the party for her book American Fashion Accessories make clear. Zac Posen certainly doesn't mince his words: "It's serious, my love for Candy. There's exuberance, and joy...it's fierce." Neither does Francisco Costa: "She's an icon. She has this love of fashion and that's so apropos, it's so right for right now, to have Candy be celebrated."

Calvin Klein turns 66 years old today. Chef (and axed Dancing with the Stars contestant) Rocco DiSpirito is celebrating his 42nd. The Today show's Ann Curry is 52. Larry King may look 100, but he's (only) turning 75. Former GE CEO Jack Welch is 73. Ted Turner is 70. WNYC president Laura Walker is turning 51. Book publisher Julie Grau is 45. Jodie Foster is 46. Model Daria Werbowy is turning 25. Meg Ryan is turning 47. Sportcaster Ahmad Rashad turns 59. Actress Allison Janney is 49. Former Olympic gymnast Kerri Strug is turning 31. And TV legend Dick Cavett is 72 years old today.

♦ The Ashley Dupre press bonanza begins: In her first print interview with People, which hits newsstands on Friday (the same day she'll appear on 20/20), Dupre says she's just a "normal girl" who has "a lot of depth," and that she feels sorry for Silda Spitzer, but doesn't blame herself for Eliot's downfall. [People, NYP]
♦ Are Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin splitting up? The two have spent very little time together since this summer, and now she's become "very good friends" with Fontainebleau hotel owner Jeff Soffer. Gwynnie reportedly spent time with Soffer (and his Bentley and yacht) this past weekend in Miami. [P6]
♦ Britney Spears is supposedly dating a 27-year-old model named Marco D'Angelo who she met through friends in Las Vegas. [Star]
♦ It looks like Anne Hathaway is attracted to lovable losers, since people who know her new boyfriend, actor Adam Shulman, say he's an "opportunist" who "went after all the heiresses" when he was a student at Brown. [P6]

♦ The U.S. consumer price index fell 1.0 percent in October compared to the previous month, the biggest drop in 61 years. [WSJ]
♦ Citigroup is liquidating another one of its hedge funds after it plunged 53 percent last month. Also: Citi's stock dropped to its lowest level in 13 years yesterday. [FT, NYP]
♦ Just because he spends his days taking aim at Wall Streeters doesn't mean Andrew Cuomo left any bigwig financiers off the guest list for his birthday party/fundraiser on Dec. 2. [NYP]
♦ The CEOs of GM, Ford and Chrysler who pleaded poverty in front of Congress yesterday flew their private jets to get there. [ABC News]
♦ Most hedge funds are pulling back right now, but hedge fund king John Paulson actually celebrated on Monday night with a lavish dinner for more than 100 at the Metropolitan Club. [DB]

The hip hop star MIA on marrying Ben Brewer, the son of Edgar Bronfman Jr.: "I've always had that f**k-the-system mentality, and his dad is so 'the system.' But then, they're the most liberal family—they bootlegged alcohol, for God's sake. They're rich because they threw big, illegal parties, so I don't mind." [Page Six]

The secretive team behind the late, great SocialiteRank.com (backstory here) has returned to the Web. Or least that's what the founders of Astrocrack.com tell us. (And we're inclined to believe it, if only because the site is as wickedly funny as Socialite Rank once was and full of the same colorful collages.) It's an astrology site and promises to explain such mysteries as "why Leo ladies collect tens of thousands pounds worth of beauty products" and "why Virgo men bald faster than any other human beings." The email announcement is after the jump.

♦ It's a horrifying mystery that will weigh heavily on all of our minds until it's solved: Where on earth is Karolina Kurkova's belly button? [Telegraph, Daily Mail]
♦ Diane von Furstenberg confirmed last night that she has submitted sketches for Michelle Obama's inaugural ball gown: "Well, they asked me to. Of course, everybody has." [The Cut]
♦ Best outfit worn to the CFDA/Vogue Fashion Fund Awards last night: Agyness Deyn's tux-style black suit with Marc Jacobs hat and red platforms. Absolute worst: Blake Lively's hideous Vena Cava dress, which we can only imagine was chosen to fulfill a contractual obligation to expose her boobs at all times. [stylefile, Teen Vogue]

A fresh batch of media layoffs were reported today, including cuts at Condé Nast's Lucky, Time Inc.'s Cottage Living, and Forbes. New York's Daily Intel has a rundown of the carnage. [NYM]

Stan O'Neal, the disgraced former CEO of Merrill Lynch, having lunch earlier today at Alain Ducasse's Adour in the St. Regis hotel. [Dealbreaker]

Forget the wives who can no longer afford to go wild at Barneys with their husbands' AmEx Platinum cards. The women who are really going to suffer in these turbulent economic times are the mistresses of cheating husbands. According to a new survey of men worth at least $20 million and who have had an extra-marital lover for at least a year, 80 percent said they planned to cut back on gifts, allowances, and certain perks like jet rides and vacations in light of the recession. [WSJ]

Who knew that librarians in the Midwest competed in choreographed dance competitions using their book carts? It turns out they do, as you can see in this clip. If you have your calendar open, you might want to jot down the dates of the next national competition. It'll take place at the American Library Association's annual conference in Chicago from July 9-15, 2009. [New Yorker, Chicago Tribune]

♦ Mirco del Vecchio, the executive chef of Ago, says he'll sue Robert De Niro for breach of contract if he's replaced at the restaurant by Jean-Georges Vongerichten. [Page Six]
♦ Why is Alain Ducasse's Benoit earning such bad reviews? Ducasse blames American journalists who "don't quite understand French bistro." [RG]
♦ Ruth Reichl paid an early visit to David Bouley's recently-relocated Bouley and describes it as New York's "loveliest restaurant." [Gourmet]
♦ The reservation line is officially open for John Dory, the Brit-themed restaurant by April Bloomfield, Ken Friedman, Mario Batali and Joe Bastianich that is scheduled to open on November 24th. [Eater]

Remember Elizabeth Wurtzel, the author of Prozac Nation who went back to law school, landed a job at David Boies' powerhouse firm, Boies, Schiller & Flexner, and soon found herself smack-dab in the middle of the messy sale of Wachovia to Wells Fargo? Well, it turns out Wurtzel didn't pass the bar exam last summer. (That might explain why she describes herself as a "part-time" employee at Boies' firm, and why it doesn't include her in its staff directory.) But Wurtzel appears pretty non-plussed about the fuss: "I guess when I should have been studying, I was kind of having a good time." [NYO]

Here's a surefire way to delight guests at your upcoming holiday party, assuming you're still having one, that is. You can hire a Top Chef contestant to come and do the cooking. A company called Play Concierge promises it can add some "sizzle" and "celebrity excitement" to your next event with its "Top Chefs to Order" package. The press release claims you can pick "any or all" of your favorite contestants to come to your home, although the names listed on the release are limited to the likes of Casey Thompson, CJ Jacobsen, Brian Malarkey, Dale Levitski and Richard Blais, and don't feature any actual winners. Might that have something to do with the fact that most Top Chef winners have real cooking gig and aren't all that interested in putting on a demonstration of "Extreme Cuisine: Cooking combined with adventure sports" for Aunt Sally's 50th birthday party? The full press release is after the jump.

The economy is worse off than we thought: It seems some Wall Streeters have been turned to drug dealing. A sting operation on Craigslist uncovered a rather unlikely culprit: "A Citigroup vice president, Mark Rayner, attracted police attention after posting an ad offering Ecstasy, ketamine, cocaine and crystal meth. An undercover cop arrested him after he tried to sell 50 Ecstasy pills and 7 grams of cocaine." But at least Rayner has a new career lined up—unlike the vast majority of the 50,000 Citi employees who were laid off yesterday. [NYDN]