The identities of these blonde socials after the jump!

Mother's Day is right around the corner, and to honor those who have sacrificed so much only to watch in horror at the rotten people we've since become, Adecco Group—"the largest staffing agency in the world"—asked a bunch of people about the moms they admire most. (Do note that just because it's a temp agency that did the survey, that should not suggest that motherhood is a temporary occupation. It isn't. Well, not usually.) In any event, the survey asked working moms, working dads and working non-parents to answer this question of great importance, and unsurprisingly, all three groups picked Michelle Obama as the most admired mom in America. But then the results get a little screwy! Apparently, Sarah Palin—yes, really—came up No. 2 for two of the three groups. And Jenny McCarthy (above), who has always gone out of her way to set a good example, is the fourth most admired mom in America. The list/press release that will instantly undermine your faith in the future of this country is below.

Kiefer Sutherland's headbutt of Jack McCollough may have far-reaching consequences, and not just because Kiefer will probably face assault charges in connection with the incident. The eighth season of 24 is set to begin taping any day now, but if Sutherland has to do time behind bars, that may totally mess up the production schedule! Then again, there's always the possibility that Kiefer could take a cue from the show and figure out a way to solve all of his legal problems—as well as bust a few terrorists and save a few lives—in less than an hour, in which case all will turn out okay. [THR]

Remember the angry protest outside the New School a few weeks ago, the one in which students barricaded themselves inside a building and demanded the university's controversial president, Bob Kerrey, resign? Well, they're getting their way! Bob Kerrey will, indeed, be leaving the institution. In, like, two years or so. [NYT]

Who's benefiting from the collapse of the economy besides vulture investors, short sellers and bargain-hunting fashionistas? Blondes! Or, more specifically, blue-eyed blonde models, who are experiencing a renaissance now that designers are casting "wholesome-looking girls with flaxen manes" in their ads in an effort to "reassure" rather than "shock" the consumer.

Christie's auction of Impressionist and modern art last night was considerably more successful that the Sotheby's auction the night before last. The event raked in $102.7 million—close to double Sotheby's haul of $61.3 million—and while it's still a long way off from what Christie's was pulling in when the going was good, it's nice to hear at least one victim of Bernie Madoff got to walk away with some (much needed) cash in his pocket. Jerome Fisher, a founder of Nine West who lost an estimated $150 million as part of the Ponzi scheme, managed to sell a Picasso, "The Musketeer With a Pipe," for $14.6 million, well within the estimated range of $12-$18 million. [NYT, WSJ]

"Has anyone else noticed that Anish Kapoor looks like an Indian Graydon Carter?" asks a reader. (Kapoor, in case you were unaware, is a famous sculptor and lives in Bombay.) To be perfectly honest, the thought never dawned on us! But looking at the photos side by side, we have to admit it: The reader has a point. Naturally, we have no idea if Kapoor set out to resemble the Vanity Fair editor. But if he really wants to make the similarity stick, he's probably going to have to make an investment in some hairspray. The South Asian climate is no friend of the seagull haircut, that's for sure.

• Kelly Killoren Bensimon isn't having much luck unloading her 2,800-square-foot home in East Hampton, which she put on the market for $14.5 million two years ago and was most recently offering for $10.9 million. The Further Lane estate has now been taken off the market, although Bensimon hasn't given up hope on finding someone willing to pay $295,000 to rent it for the summer season. [NYP, DM]
• Raef LaFrentz, a power forward for the Portland Trail Blazers, has picked up a New York pad. LaFrentz paid $1.7 million for a two-bedroom condo in the Liberty Lofts building on West 64th Street. [Cityfile]

Porn icon Traci Lords turns 41 today. Attorney H. Rodgin Cohen, the chairman of Sullivan & Cromwell and one of the foremost authorities on banking law, is 65. Former New Mexico Senator Pete Domenici is 77. Comedian Doug Benson is 35. Herbert Siegel, who assembled a media empire before selling it to Rupert Murdoch for $5 billion, is 81. Tech entrepreneur and occasional political candidate Andrew Rasiej is turning 51. Soap star Michael Knight of All My Children is turning 50. Acclaimed author Peter Carey is 65. And movie director Amy Heckerling (Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Look Who's Talking, Clueless) turns 55 today.

• After 16 years of marriage, Stephanie Seymour has filed for divorce from her polo-playing, art-obsessed husband, Peter Brant. And it doesn't sound like he's taking it well: The mogul reportedly changed the locks on the couple's Greenwich mansion, and is now forcing Stephanie to sleep in the maid's quarters and threatening to take custody of their three kids. The good news, at least as far as the public's concerned: From the looks of it, the split could be just as riveting as last summer's Brinkley-Cook saga. [P6]
• Kiefer Sutherland is expected to turn himself in to the NYPD today for headbutting Jack McCollough. The penalties may be stiff, too, considering he's still on probation from a 2007 DUI arrest. [NYP]
• The Malawian father of baby Mercy says he was appalled by what Madonna wore to the Costume Institute gala this week, since she should "feel ashamed in that gear." We couldn't agree more. [MSNBC]
• Lindsay Lohan spent the night at Sam Ronson's house and changed her BlackBerry messenger name to "LL loves Sam Ronson" on Tuesday, which probably means the two are getting back together. [People]

• Bank of America chief Ken Lewis and several federal officials will be asked to testify under oath as part of an investigation into whether BofA was pressured by the government into completing its deal with Merrill Lynch. [WSJ]
• The stress test tally thus far: Of the 19 big banks under review, six don't need to raise capital, seven others need to come up with some cash, and it remains to be seen what category the other six will fall into. [WSJ]
• General Motors, which faces a June 1 deadline to sort out its troubles or file for bankruptcy, reported a $6 billion loss for the first quarter. [NYT]
• The number of people filing initial claims for unemployment benefits fell last week, and to their lowest level in more than 3 months, too. [CNN]

Crunch filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection today. The chain won't be disappearing, though. The chain reports it has a buyer lined up and willing to take over, and only two locations willl close as the company reorganizes. As part of the filing, Crunch also revealed that it owes more than $100 million to 50,000 creditors. So if you check your credit card statement next month and you see you were "accidentally" billed you for the next three months, that probably means you're one of them. [Reuters, Crain's]

• Jack McCollough's orange Oakleys couldn't cover up the scratch left behind by Kiefer Sutherland's headbutt the other night, although thankfully the Proenza Schouler co-founder wasn't seriously injuried in the incident. McCollough's rep said today he was the victim of a "vicious, violent, unprovoked assault." And the NYPD seems to agree. Sutherland is expected to be charged with assault tomorrow. [People, NYP]
• You may have thought Azzedine Alaïa was having a lousy week what with the plot by Anna Wintour to snub him at the Costume Institute gala. But he appears to be rebounding nicely. Michelle Obama wore a lovely Alaïa number to the Time magazine party last night. [FWD]
• Speaking of the gala, it raised $2 million less than last year. [WWD]
• Derek Lam's first boutique opens tonight. [Style.com]

• Frank Bruni weighs in on David Burke's Fishtail in the Times this week, giving the eatery a single star for its "real charms" yet "deeply fatiguing" menu. [NYT]
• A look at the menu at Table 8, which opens tonight. [GS]
• Jay Cheshes hits up Silvano Marchetto's two new outposts in this week's Time Out, Scuderia and Da Silvano Bistecca. [TONY]
• Oprah's KFC sandwich giveaway sparked a riot today. [Gothamist, Gawker]
• Eight "new" rules on ordering wine while dining out. [NYP]
• "Real Housewife" Alex McCord's top food pics in Cobble Hill. [GS]
• Four Seasons co-owners Julian Niccolini and Alex von Bidder were roasted in honor of the eatery's 50th last night. Daniel Boulud on the duo: "The only thing these guys know about food is how much to charge for it." [NYT]

Records Show How Madoff Used Firm as 'Piggy Bank' [NYT/Dealbook]

Paris Hilton is involved in some lawsuit over God knows what, and as part of a deposition, she was asked about several entries on her cell phone bill. Her response? "I've never looked at my phone bill in my entire life," she explained, adding that she didn't even know who paid the bill in the first place. "With my phone I never know, because I lose it all the time... I probably get a new cell phone like every two weeks." Of course, she could afford to lose her cell phone every hour of the day if she felt like it: Court documents indicate she raked in $22 million from 2006-07 thanks to sponsorship deals and public appearances. One of the companies that chipped in a good deal of that? Cell phone giant Motorola. Naturally. [TSG, AP]

So you've probably been hearing that the recession has eased a bit, and there are signs the U.S. economy is finally turning the corner. Fewer people are losing their jobs! The stock market had its best April in years! People are spending money again! We have absolutely no idea if this is true or it's all part of some plot by Ben Bernanke to use the power of positive thinking to improve the economic outlook—and if that's the case, we're really screwed—but here's a sign that our darkest days are behind us: Someone actually spent $6 million buying the first-ever Hermès-designed helicopter (or "l'Hélicoptère par Hermès," as they like to refer to it). Okay, so the buyer is in Abu Dhabi and "signature Hermès orange accents" and "natural-grained Hermès calf leather upholstery" never really goes out of style there, but still! We're totally taking this as a positive sign regardless. [Luxist]

Michael Bloomberg isn't just a highly gifted musician. He knows how to cook, too! Okay, not really, but he did turn up on the set of Martha Stewart's show yesterday to show off his recipe for "Gracie Mansion" oatmeal cookies. (The episode airs on May 13 if you'd like to go ahead and set your DVR now.) The recipe is free of trans fats, as you probably expected, and you'll find the full recipe below, just in case you're feeling particularly brave this afternoon.

Last week, Phil Falcone, the billionaire hedge fund mogul best known for picking up the Guccione mansion in 2007 for $49 million, was slapped with a lawsuit by a former employee at his firm. Howard Kagan, who joined Falcone's Harbinger Capital Partners in 2003, claims he was stiffed out of $62 million bonus for the work he did in 2008. How, exactly, did Kagan come up with such a huge sum given Falcone's fund lost, like, billions last year, much like every other hedge fund in town? That's unclear, although it's beginning to look like the suit was part of an attempt to force Falcone into coughing up the cash rather than face the prospect of bad press. Sure, that tactic might work with some nerdy hedge fund manager who enjoys spending quiet nights at home with his HP-12C calculator. But you don't pull that kind of stunt on a ballsy guy like Falcone and live to tell. Did we mention that the dude lives in a former orgy palace and keeps a pet pig in one of his 367 spare bedrooms? [Dealbreaker]