Life can be tough as a celebrity willing to go almost anywhere, with anyone, for money. How do you know if the guy who paid you six-figures to attend his birthday party in Chechnya is a bloodthirsty madman who tortures for sport? Looking that stuff up—and knowing whether to care about it—is hard. That's why two non-profits are teaming up to answer the question: Is the oligarch I'm privately entertaining for money a monster?

The enlightening Tumblr Teenage Mutant Ninja Noses reveals a fact heretofore unknown to us: that every nose has the power to become a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle head. Your nose, my nose, Justin Bieber's nose, and Usher's nose—everybody's nose. Together we are one.

Every day, celebrities across the world are followed and photographed by the omnipresent paparazzi, often to entertaining results. Here are some of our favorite shots from the past week.

Every day, celebrities across the world are followed and photographed by the omnipresent paparazzi, often to entertaining results. Here are some of our favorite shots from the past week.

Lindsay's collecting exotic objects. Paul McCartney feels like somebody's husband now. Arnold Schwarzenegger touches himself in public. Sunday gossip is dressed in a neon green bikini and matching high heels and posing awkwardly on the hood of a sports car.

Recently we stopped by a Halloween superstore in search of some new work clothes (dressing up in costumes helps stave off writer's block), and noticed amidst the racks of Slutty Thises and Slutty Thats a pile of rubber Charlie Sheen masks for sale. It didn't surprise us that someone would want to dress up as this year's ultimate Hollywood meltdown and fright show, given the "Boo!! Scary!!" angle of the holiday—but little did we know that "Charlie Sheen" would actually win this year's costume popularity contest.

Tipster Amanda sent us this picture of dirty, unemployed patchouli monster Penn Badgley participating in yesterday's Occupy Wall Street march by holding a sign (handcrafted by a Tea Partier, it seems) and demanding the return of the Glass-Steagall Act. For some reason he (or the original signmaker) filled in all the holes in the letters—maybe to represent how he/the protesters have "had their fill" of corporate greed? What does it mean.

Johnny Depp says he's deeply sorry—or Depply sorry—for telling Vanity Fair that having one's picture taken "feel[s] like you're being raped somehow. Raped... It feels like a kind of weird—just weird, man." As it turns out, he was wrong.

A 20-year-old sex tape starring rapper and Kiwi-in-hiding Tupac Shakur has suddenly popped up for some reason. Highlights include singing, dancing, and a cameo from Money B from Digital Underground. Oh, and sex! Only oral, though. [Image via AP]

Every day, celebrities across the world are followed and photographed by the omnipresent paparazzi, often to entertaining results. Here are some of our favorite shots from the past week.

Every day, celebrities across the world are followed and photographed by the omnipresent paparazzi, often to entertaining results. Here are some of our favorite shots from the past week.

Remember how Kate Winslet had to escape from Richard Branson's private Virgin Island after it caught ablaze during Hurricane/Tropical Storm Irene? Well, it appears that the blaze was caused by all the hot hot passion between Winslet and Branson's nephew, Ned, who was also on the scene.

Hopeless romantic Arnold Schwarzenegger is going to release his memoir next October—and according to his publisher, Simon & Schuster, the book is tentatively titled Total Recall: My Unbelievably True Life Story.

After finding God in the Lynwood Celebrity Jail, one-time trainwreck Nicole Richie rode out her 20s having perfect babies, writing perfect books, and designing perfect fashions. Today she celebrates her 30th birthday, probably with sorbet. [Image via AP]

Every day, celebrities across the world are followed and photographed by the omnipresent paparazzi, often to entertaining results. Here are some of our favorite shots from the past week.

Actor Alec Baldwin was so incensed that Fox cut his joke about News Corp CEO Rupert Murdoch from tonight's Emmy Awards coverage that he's not showing up for tonight's ceremony at all. Fox's editorial decision made his bit not-funny, Baldwin says.

Halle Berry's been filming her new movie, Cloud Atlas, in Glasgow, Scotland, where it's apparently as cold as the McDickens. To stay warm, the usually sweaty actress has been clutching to hot water bottles and doing dances, which we'll categorize as "funny."

It's a time-honored tradition for reports at gay newspapers or magazines to ask straight celebrities, "If you played for the other team, who would you want to sleep with?" It's like that will make them slightly more gay or something. But everyone seems to have a celebrity they want to bone who is not of the gender they usually bone. Who's yours?

Every day, celebrities across the world are followed and photographed by the omnipresent paparazzi, often to entertaining results. Here are some of our favorite shots from the past week.

Every day, celebrities across the world are followed and photographed by the omnipresent paparazzi, often to entertaining results. Here are some of the more amusing shots from the past week.