Much attention has been paid to Mad Men's female actresses' anatomy. But what about the plight of Jon Hamm's penis? The poor man can't afford underpants and is forced to display his genitalia in clingy pants everywhere he goes.

Toronto-based photographer John Hryniuk has spent the past couple of years photographing subjects at celebrity lookalike conventions. Do you think these George Bushes, Barack Obamas, Sarah Palins, Tiger Woods(es), and Hillary Clintons are as good as the real thing?

A government clerk has been charged with improperly accessing computerized passport data on hundreds of celebrities and their families. Lindsay Lohan's sister Ali had her information compromised, and the family is up in arms.

Former Haitian presidential candidate and Fugee Wyclef Jean has been hospitalized for "stress and fatigue," in addition to "headaches." The simple fact that those are all often euphemisms for more scandalous conditions should not be construed as meaning anything. [Billboard]

Celebrities: scaredy-cats! Turns out it's not just paranoid right-wing action star wannabes like Roger Ailes and Sean Hannity who are licensed to carry guns. So do a host of other New York celebrities. What is Marc Anthony so scared of?

The New York Times prints readers' celebrity sightings. Congrats on inventing this new thing!

New Jersey guy Wyclef Jean is still whining about being disqualified from a presidential election in a country that he doesn't live in. So he wrote a song! In it, he says the electoral council should be thrown in prison.

Today celebrities are awful because of awards gifting suites. You know, where millionaires are given extravagant amounts of fancy free shit because they're famous. Well the Emmys are on Sunday and this year the suites are all about charity.

In a new article, Zac Efron moans "best… orgasm… ever!" with his pants unzipped in a public restroom, and Tom Cruise takes him for a pleasure ride on his motorcycle. Conclusion: "Nothing about Efron merits even flipping on the gaydar."

The onslaught of Lady Gaga has been fast and ubiquitous, and her Vanity Fair cover has the publicity machine working overtime. We love you, Gaga, but if you want to keep the love alive, you need to take a break.

Lindsay Lohan was released from jail at 1:35 am (Pacific) today. Next stop: rehab!

Angelina Jolie is in nanny denial. Thought to have six minders for her six children, Angie still complains she and Brad are "like bartenders" and "waiters" to their children. Then what are you paying the help for, lady?

Nicole Kidman interviewed Marion Cotillard for Interview magazine, and the result was either glorious or insufferable, depending on your perspective. It begins with the actresses calling to each other in the secret language of fabulosity:

Here goes Whoopi Goldberg getting mad at bloggers for getting mad at her for defending crazy Cujo racist Mel Gibson. She makes some nuanced point about racism or whatever, but really the whole point is: Whoopi Goldberg knows celebrities!

You know journalism's in trouble when a reporter describes her job as "like a call girl without the sex." Meet "club girls," women paid to go out every night and party with celebrities, then report their findings to tabloid magazines.

The actor and bald person is releasing his scent all over America's face. His musk has been infused into cologne, body wash, and deodorant, and this Thursday you can buy it all. Hopefully it's Moonlighting-era smell, not Color of Night.

Indonesian pop star Ariel has been charged under a 2008 anti-pornography law for making sex tapes with female celebrities Luna Maya and Cut Tari. He could face 12 years in jail. Police say Ariel and Luna are being "uncooperative." [BBC]

Ken Starr—a famous investment adviser with a long list of celebrity clients, not the Clinton prosecutor—was arrested this morning and charged with running a Ponzi scheme. Also arrested: former NYC Council president Andrew Stein. Big scandal's afoot! [Updated]

Celebrity Dealbreakers: When Loving Them Becomes Impossible [Jezebel]

Each year, around this time, dozens of celebrities fan out across America and descend on college towns in the middle of nowhere to deliver the same tired cliches to a group of hungover college students. Who are these people?