Morgan Stanley CEO James Gorman says of the possibility of another financial crisis like the one in 2008, "The probability of it happening again in our lifetime is as close to zero as I could imagine." James Gorman is only 55 years old.

BuzzFeed's McKay Coppins has a wonderfully viral-distribution-ready piece of political analysis today: "Was Mitt Romney Right About Everything?"

The farther we get from the last economic collapse, the closer we get to the next economic collapse. But which bubble is next to pop? Student loans? Desert real estate? Today, we turn our untrained eye to the backbone of the U.S. stock market.

Yesterday we wondered what the next bubble will be, and when it will pop, thereby destroying us all. We intend to keep an eye on all possible bubbles from now until the next crash, so that we may claim to have "predicted" it. Today's candidate: flimsy homes in desert wastelands.

Woefully underinformed speculators like us regularly prognosticate wildly about where the next economic disaster will come from, in a futile attempt to prepare ourselves for the inevitable anvil of financial doom that always, but always, falls upon the head of the underclass. How long until we all are smashed again?

Welcome to the 2006 economy, where stocks are booming, the art market is setting records, and home prices are soaring all over the country. In fact— not to rush things along too much— it's already time for you to start worrying about the collapse of the next housing bubble.

Will 2013 be the year when the student debt bubble pops, raining havoc down upon us all in the form of economic destruction? Eh, who knows. What we do know is that college prices, which have been shooting skyward for many years as institutions reaped every last dollar they could from the public's hope and ignorance, are now slowly—ever so slowly—calming down.

This WSJ story today on the rising cost of college for the affluent is a cavalcade of shocking statistics about our current student debt crisis: the average price of a four-year college has more than doubled in real terms since 1985; three million households owe $50k or more in student loans, a number that's tripled since 1989, inflation-adjusted. When even the golf course set can't afford college, you know we have a problem.

The funniest (meaning "most horrific and devastating") thing about student loans is that, thanks to some nifty lobbying, you cannot get rid of them in bankruptcy. They just stick around like one of the more bothersome STDs no matter how impoverished you become. But that might change, a bit! Which would be major news for you broke, educated people.

Whew. That recession! Amirite? That sure was a hairy few years. *Sips cognac ostentatiously* Welp. Reckon it's just about time for a brand new housing bubble, no?

If you ask people in Silicon Valley about the dismal job market they'll laugh and say, "What's 'job market'? A new mobile social networking app?" then pull a quick 360 on a Segway powered by seaweed smoothies.

Perhaps you've heard that Facebook is going public this week in a massive IPO that values the company at over $100 billion. There's an apocalyptic air about the frenzy to be the first to invest in Facebook, as if this is the last chance we'll ever have to throw our money into an overhyped tech company stock. And here is a story that perfectly captures the dread and sadness I feel when confronted with so many people's boundless money-related optimism.

This qualifies as a bit of a vague, not totally well-established-in-a-statistical-way trend; but the fact that it exists at all for one single person in America is, I believe, newsworthy. Families are taking out tens of thousands of dollars worth of loans in order to pay for private kindergarten for their whelps. That is some fucked up shit.

On the same day that we learn that student loan debt in America has passed the $1 trillion mark—meaning that student debt is even worse than we thought just weeks ago—it's reassuring to also learn that this massive, shaky bubble is perched on a firm foundation of complete financial ignorance.

When we last checked in on the student loan bubble, debt levels stood at "unimaginably huge." And now? Still unimaginably huge. And poised to destroy your family, as well!

Facebook will file to go public tomorrow, in case you missed the rolling thunder bombardment of news articles this week, or in the months preceding. There won't be the faintest reason for the average person to care about this IPO until shares actually start selling months from now, but in the meantime you should steel yourself for endless breathless hype pandemonium. Oh, it's going to be awful.

Zynga was supposed to help launch the market into another tech-stock boom. It has impressive revenue and, ostensibly, a history of profits. And that's why everyone's nervously talking today about how the videogame company's brand new stock is melting: The tech bubble is turning to bust.

Vimeo founder Jake Lodwick was one of the original fameballs who rolled around Gawker's misty past. He's back, having just scored $1.5 million for a new venture that is, well… hm. It's unclear what it is.

The tech bubble is burst, but Facebook is moving to quickly revive it: The social network is planning to go public as soon as April at a valuation of more than $100 billion.

Groupon just closed down 35 percent from the start of the week and, for the first time ever, below its initial public offering price. Most other big, recent tech IPOs are underwater too. It's time to admit the tech bubble is burst.