The Chinese government today released a plan to end taxpayer-funded, booze-fueled sex parties in 2011, as well as official "seminars" held in Las Vegas and other cities that cost the country around $58 billion every year. That's some serious partying.

The new must-have "ultimate accessory," for ladies: fruity booze, disguised as perfume. "Our point is not drink a lot to be glamorous - it's drink responsibly and in moderation and just be glamorous over all." Ohh, okay. [NYT]

"Experts" have weighed in on the dangers of drinking too much during the holidays, and guess what? It's supposedly really bad for you, and could even increase the risk of cancer. But you can avoid this fate!

All-too-sober wine marketing mavens have their eyes on the wine drinkers of the future: The "Millennials," a.k.a. you, probably. Don't be intimidated, young Four Loko-swillers. The wine industry is going to make this whole thing very easy for you.

Today we talked about drinking on planes and drinking in airports! Yay! Good times for all! Except: Bad times for all, it turns out. Yeah, so said one commenter, some sort of flying expert.

How is the airline industry's plan to save itself by showering passengers in booze coming along? Swimmingly (in booze)! Let's check in on the latest ways you can drunk at inappropriate times in airports across America.

When a group of Dutch Embassy guys allegedly tried to leave Arthur's Tavern in Greenwich Village without paying a $315 tab, NYPD officers intervened and a brawl ensued, resulting in a chipped tooth, a broken finger and bruises. And arrests!

Who are the real victims of our government's Puritan frenzy to ban Four Loko for good? College kids—who the ban is supposed to help—and hardworking small businesspersons. Paging the Republican Congress! Your wedge issue is here!

This is your last chance to stock up on Four Loko: The alcoholic energy drink will be removed from store shelves by December 13.

It's Saturday morning so there's a good chance you're hung over. Not very fun! But at least you're not this girl, who got stuck in a dryer presumably after some serious drinking. And then her friends put it on YouTube.

A naked, sleepwalking pillhead has won a €10m libel case against his employer in Ireland.

The caffeine-infused cultural phenomenon known as Four Loko will no longer contain caffeine, guarana or taurine, according to a statement last night from its producer, Phusion Projects. The company remained defiant, saying, "the combination of alcohol and caffeine is safe."

After a fun campaign of widespread panic resulting in four state bans and an irresistible opportunity for political grandstanding, it looks like the FDA is set to ban caffeinated alcohol drinks once and for all—everywhere in America.

So maybe weed is bad for you, but on the other hand, drinking is good for you! If you're a middle-aged woman having a drink or two in the afternoon. Which—let's be honest—you are.

It looks like Four Loko's run in New York is coming to an end.

One great quote (out of many) from an Observer Four Loko party recap: "Dude, my heart is palpitating."

Washington becomes the second state to ban caffeinated alcohol drinks, thereby solving all their problems.

New York Senator Chuck Schumer says alcoholic energy drinks like Four Loko are "spreading like a plague across the country." This despite being extremely disgusting! Schumer is urging New York to ban the radioactive stuff. Washington's ban starts next week.

An all-you-can-drink Four Loko party on the Lower East Side was shut down by the host for legal reasons. Bummer.

The NY State Liquor Authority is trying to ban gross caffeinated alcoholic drink Four Loko.