Thriller: 15,000 Bernie Madoff masks have gone out for sale this Halloween.

We're taught to shoot for the stars, to be ambitious. Well screw that, because, as swindler Marc Dreier demonstrates, no matter how hard you try to be the best, someone will always be better.

Lindsay Lohan makes her big Paris Fashion Week catwalk debut. Beyonce dad is impregnating women and moving women to the left. Vincent Gallo: still awesome. Liza Minella, Michael Jackson, Padma, Diller, the High Line! Here's your Sunday Morning Gossip Roundup:

When Irv Picard makes a promise, he keeps it. A few days ago, the trustee overseeing the Madoff mess said he planned to file a lawsuit against several other members of the Madoff clan—including Bernie's brother, two sons, and niece—for treating the family firm like a "piggy bank." And today he delivered, filing an action in federal bankruptcy court seeking the return of $199 million.

So did Bernie Madoff attempt to atone for his sins on Yom Kippur yesterday? That's hard to say, although prison officials say they did give him the chance to take the day off from his usual work detail: "Prison officials would not say if Madoff, serving a 150-year sentence, took advantage of the day off on the holiest day of the year in the Jewish faith or whether he participated in an evening prayer session with other Jewish inmates on what is a day of atonement and repentance." [ABC News]

Irving Picard has the thankless job of divvying up the remaining crumbs of Bernie Madoff's empire among the Madoff victims. But Irving Picard is going to be much more popular now that he's finally suing Madoff's family, for everything.

The Madoff show goes on. In an interview that aired on last night's 60 Minutes, court-appointed trustee Irving Picard said he plans to file a civil suit against Bernie sons, Mark and Andy, this week which will seek the return of $198 million. And just so no one in the immediate family feels left out, he'll be suing Bernie's brother Peter and niece Shana, too. [Dealbook]

We really can't imagine why, but Bernie Madoff's old assistant, Eleanor Squillari, has decided to auction off a portrait of Madoff that the fraudster gave her as a gift back in the late '80s. (Squillari mentioned the photo in the June issue of Vanity Fair: "Once, he gave me a picture of him taken by Karsh, the famous Canadian photographer, saying, 'Here, hang this over your bed.'") It's estimated to sell for between $3,000-$5,000. But hurry up! Bidding ends tomorrow. [Artnet via Dealbreaker]

You probably assumed that anyone who had the misfortune to entrust their money to Bernie Madoff lost their shirts, right? Not quite. Only about half of his clients lost money when you account for how much cash they withdrew from their accounts during the same time period, say prosecutors. Does this mean prosecutors might now consider cutting Madoff's jail sentence in half? We're guessing the answer is "no," but we thought we'd throw it out there. [NYDN]

The Madoff's Montauk beach house has sold. For $8.75 million. That's above the asking price! What is it people love so much about Bernie Madoff memorabilia?

Bernie Madoff's home in Montauk, which went up for sale two weeks ago, has found a buyer. ABC News reports the beachfront home has been sold to an unidentified person in an all cash deal "over the asking price," according to Joan and Raymond Hegner of the Corcoran Group. Interest in the fraudster's property was "fast and furious," say the brokers. Maybe it was it the water pressure that sealed the deal? [ABC News, previously]

• Corrugated cardboard magnate Dennis Mehiel has chopped $5.4 million off the price of his Carhart Mansion duplex (left). The 10,350-square-foot spread, which had been listed for $34.9 million, can now be yours for a much more modest $29.5 million. [NYO, BHS]
• Michael Steinberg, a portfolio manager at Sigma Capital, a hedge fund affiliated with Steve Cohen's SAC Capital, has picked up a new apartment. Steinberg and his wife Elizabeth paid $8 million for a penthouse at 885 Park Avenue. [Cityfile]
• Clara Markowicz, co-founder of Original Media LLC and a co-producer of The Rachel Zoe Project, has paid $3.55 million for a three-bedroom, ninth-floor apartment at 21 Astor Place, the building where real estate scion Jared Kushner recently picked up an apartment, too. [Cityfile]

All of Bernie Madoff's luxurious old shit is for sale. You've seen his Montauk getaway home and his UES penthouse; now, thrill to the sight of his Palm Beach vacation home! Buy it for $8.5 mil. Full of knick-knacks!

• Gisele Bundchen red-brick townhouse in the West Village is up for sale. The supermodel paid $5.8 million for 42 Barrow Street in 2005. (She bought the home under the name Casa Vida LLC; "Vida" also happens to be the name of her dog.) Now it's been listed with Prudential Douglas Elliman's Raphael De Niro for $13.95 million. [NYO]
• Eve Weinstein, the ex-wife of producer Harvey Weinstein, has gone into contract to sell her sixth-floor apartment at 1133 Fifth. The four-bedroom spread, which first hit the market in December 2008 for $13.5 million, had been listed most recently for $11.9 million. [Cityfile, Sotheby's]

Bernie Madoff, who was able to evade the SEC while stealing billions of dollars for decades, did not have a high opinion of the SEC's investigative capabilities. For some reason! A 2005 phone transcript proves: Bernie was a comfortable crook.

• Joseph Azrack, the former head of Citigroup's real estate investment group and now a partner at Leon Black's Apollo Management, has picked up the townhouse at 24 West 11th Street. The 6,250-square-foot property (left), which first went on the market last September for $17.5 million, had been listed most recently for $14.9 million. (Curbed has photos and a floorplan here.) [NYP]
• Tony Margolis, who retired as CEO of the Tommy Bahama Group in 2008, has dropped the price of his eighth-floor apartment at 1010 Fifth Avenue for the third time since listing it in January 2008 for for $11.995 million. The three-bedroom co-op can now be yours for $9.95 million. [Cityfile, Sotheby's]
• Nancy Rutter, a former reporter for Forbes and the ex-wife of Netscape co-founder Jim Clark, has paid $3.55 million for a penthouse apartment at 230 East 73rd Street. [Cityfile]

If you haven't had a chance to take the full tour of Bernie Madoff's East 64th Street penthouse with U.S. Marshall Roland Ubaldo as your official guide, you can do so below.

Bernie Madoff is quite the real estate enthusiast! Last week his beach house went on sale (and offers are pouring in). Now, the real prize: Madoff's UES penthouse and house-arrest area is on sale for $7 million. It's decent.

A few weeks ago, Ruth Madoff received a property tax rebate from Palm Beach County for $13,821.74. The problem: The check was made out to both Ruth and Bernie, and since cashing it would have required her to deposit it into their joint account—which is frozen—Ruth wrote a letter to the agency asking that it be reissued in her name only. Was this just one more attempt to avoid turning over the cash to the authorities? That's what some people are suggesting! [NYDN, Palm Beach Post]

• Jennifer Esposito is looking to sell in the Village. The actress has put her one-bedroom apartment at 23 East 10th Street on the market, along with the one-bedroom co-op she owns upstairs. The two apartments, which Esposito once planned to combine into a duplex, are currently listed for a combined $1.435 million. [NYM, MDNY]
• Peter Buffett, the son of Warren Buffett, and his wife Jennifer have closed on the purchase of a condo at One Madison Park. The couple paid $3.5 million for the three-bedroom pad. [Cityfile, previously]