All those child support payments must be draining Matthew Knowles' bank account. Even though his daughter, Beyoncé, is worth some $265 million according to Forbes, guess who's paying for his new beach house? That's right—you!

It's on: Andrew "Raw Ross" Sorkin released his "Hit 'Em Up" after public humiliation at the hands of Paul "Thugman" Krugman. Sorkin's response gets beef points for snidely calling Paulie K. "Professor Krugman," but loses some for being wrong.

It's bonus season, so we're trying to keep up with how Goldman Sachs employees are spending their taxpayer-financed windfalls. Today's entries: A $6 million penthouse condo, and adding a new floor to the upper-east-side historical landmark in which you live.

Wall Street is cutting back on cash bonuses, which means paper-rich banksters are forced to choose between preschool tuition and new wine cellars until their restricted shares mature. Goldman Sachs is lending a hand by offering mortgages to its staff.

Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner is on Capitol Hill today, facing a barrage of camera-friendly and self-righteous (and justified!) bipartisan posturing from members of the House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform over the AIG bailout. It's been testy.

Just in time for bonus season, Goldman Sachs has been hit with two shareholder lawsuits accusing the board of "bad faith actions and breaches of...loyalty" for approving billions in bonuses while driving the global economy into a ditch.

If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can get a completely unexpected $10 billion bailout from Abu Dhabi.

The Treasury Department's soon-to-be-announced executive pay guidelines will drastically slash cash payouts to executives at GM, Citibank, AIG, Bank of America, and Chrysler. Not on the list: AIG pass-through beneficiary Goldman Sachs.

It's Thursday, so Goldman Sachs raked in billions with taxpayer help while you're still unemployed. The bank announced $3.1 billion in third-quarter profits today, and set aside $5.3 billion for bonuses. Help us find out how they spend it.

The New York Times, which six months ago forced staffers to take a 5% paycut, has been overpaying its publisher and CEO for nearly two years in violation of its own compensation rules. We're supposed to bail these people out?

Elon Musk is becoming a welfare case. Federal auto-industry loans helped save his electric-car company, Tesla. Now Musk wants another federal bailout for his embarrassing space startup. And he may well get it.

Goldman Sachs is taking the whole "bloodsucking squidmonster" thing pretty seriously. CEO Lloyd Blankfein is losing sleep over how to pay out $11 billion in taxpayer financed bonuses without catching hell from anti-Semites like everybody. Heavy weighs the crown.

Hank Paulson's attempt to weasel out of an interview with the New York Times looks more comical every day. Now it's emerged that the book he was busy writing is being written by someone else.

The St. Regis Monarch Beach, the rich-people hotel that AIG executives partied at after getting all their bailout money, couldn't pay its bills and so now a bailed-out Citigroup owns it. And it's losing money. Your money.

Tim Armstrong, AOL CEO, just bought a company from... Tim Armstrong, investor. The official line is that the deal is on the up and up, since the consummate salesman won't be taking any profits off his stake. Rich.

Well this is almost refreshing—-A clip from Glenn Beck's daily clownshow where the centerpiece clown is someone not named Glenn Beck. Who could it possibly be? Television's Coach Hayden Fox, naturally!

He could blame his investment firm's failures on the economy. His wife's DWI could be covered up by media pals. But the Obama Administration's auto-bailout adviser can't hide a bribery investigation.

Remember Neel Kashkari, the government's workaholic bailout czar? We're guessing his job overseeing the nation's finances isn't keeping him that busy. He had time to return to his high school and give a speech!

Can't pay your bills? Blame Tim Geithner and Bernie Madoff! That's the route two restaurateurs are taking as their finances take a recessionary turn.

For more than seven months, GM CEO Rick Wagoner steadfastly resisted calls to step down. Surprising, then, that he was forced out on the watch of shameless gladhander and political suck-up Steven Rattner.