A new study find that the domesticated wolf-descendants are getting smarter and more moral from living with people, reports the Daily Mail. Hah! Are the dogs also picking up on our nastier habits? Smoking, gossiping, plotting, cheating, and lying?

A momentous trend apparently began last week in the least likely of places: The Morning Show with Mike and Juliet, where the hosts introduced a new "Bleep Photo" feature for particularly saucy and immodest guests. The test drive came Aug. 13 when, while interviewing a pair of women about their ambivalence toward binge-drinking, producers cut out of nowhere to a photograph of a cat eating spaghetti. It was a Random TV Moment For the Ages, rivaling David Letterman's greatest for sheer "WTF"-ness and cultural import. The blip has since been parsed in a variety of formats including FishBowl LA, where it was discovered Monday that the cutaway was merely a "Bleep Photo" to override one of the women's descriptions of being "fucked up."The Soup picked it up as well, rendering even Joel McHale's incredulity unusually authentic. Frankly, we're still confused — but that doesn't mean the idea can't work. Follow the jump for Defamer's own customized "Bleep Photos," culled from both our deep in-house archive and the obscure wilds of the Web. We like cats and pasta and everything just fine, but face it: If you know you're good, then you know you can be better.

Roger Clark, the NY1 morning reporter who is perhaps the goofiest and most endearing working journalist in America, on some of his favorite recent stories here in our dark metropolis: "I did a story about a kids fishing derby in Prospect Park [Brooklyn], and I actually caught a fish, so that was exciting. A place I enjoyed when I was growing up was the New York Aquarium, and I got to go back and get kissed by a sea lion, which is something I don't get to do every day." Any promising news pitches lately, Roger? "I got one about an international yo-yo contest and that's a possibility, that's something that I may consider covering." Surely you will! After the jump is a must-see video of Roger inexplicably breaking into a James Earl Jones impression while covering a UN meeting. And yes, we fully expect this man to save journalism:

Hot on the paw heels of the news that Ryan Seacrest was devoured by sharks over the weekend, comes word that Gordon Ramsay, the blustering British cook who yells at cooking school dropouts for a living, was viciously attacked by a puffin. He is expected to live. What's going on? Are animals rebelling against the most rich and glittery of our species? We'll take a look at some other celebrity animal attacks after the jump and try to detect a pattern.

New York Times publisher and genial buffoon Arthur "Pinch" Sulzberger is not worried about how his newspaper's circulation sucks and the share price is at a historic low. You know why? Because Craig Newmark, the guy who invented Cragslist and destroyed the newspaper revenue stream, just got a Times subscription! So hey, no worries, Times staffers. If there's one thing Pinch has learned since he took over as publisher 16 years ago, it's to always mention the moose in the room. But not to bring an actual moose with him anymore.

Film and television are not just mediums where mere human beings get to show off! They're also for the animals and aliens and all sorts of strange beings who make our lives that much more livable. So who are your favorite furry, or slimy, or scaly, or just plain not-human stars of the big and little screens? Share! My selection-I'm still in a monkey sort of mood-after the jump.

Not to shock all of you, but evidence has arisen that indicates that breast-toting sex symbol Pamela Anderson may not be the beacon of morality you all thought. She's a prominent vegetarian and opponent of KFC and all its chicken-slaying ways. So while she was down in Australia filming Big Brother, she took the opportunity to hand-deliver a letter of protest to a KFC outlet. The twist: Pam is getting paid half a million dollars to be on Big Brother-and the biggest sponsor of the show is KFC. I guess she can say she's milking them dry of all their dirty blood money? Yes, that'll work. Below, the text of her missive, explaining the difference between a chicken and a superstar:

I recently started subscribing to National Geographic, and its coverage of Stonehenge and jungles is incomparable. But I'm convinced that the sly geography wonks on its editorial staff get their kicks each month by selecting the most insane letters to the editor, and putting them into the magazine. The new issue has letters about a March story on animal intelligence. They must have gotten thousands! So who's represented? Inexplicable dog haters, lamb-whisperers, and schizophrenics:

Happy Summer, everyone! The folks at nbc11.com have assembled a big ol' slideshow of totally adorable animals (and a couple of kids) being totally adorable. Cuteness run amok after the jump!

Beloved brilliant genius intellectual novelist Keith Gessen seems a little stressed out! He freely admits that he's losing, or has lost, his mind. (Just when the world needs it most!) He wants desperately to take back the internet, from the geighs, and he speaks for the elite trees. But he promised, last night, to do some things that will help. He will live an admirable life, and he will "adopt the kittens and date everyone." Ok, Keith! Here is your kitten. She is a stray from beautiful Ocean Hill, Brooklyn, right off the J. She lives on your Day Editor's stoop and loves people. Right now her name is "Sammy Davis Mewnior" but you could name her "George Meorwell" or "Mrs. Keith Gessen" or whatever if you wanted to. More adorable photos after the jump!

Bite-size birdies that get peacocked (have their wings colored darker with a magic marker) become sexy studs in the field. It actually ups their testosterone! "Other females might be looking at them as being a little more sexy, and the birds might be feeling better about themselves in response to that." Wow, so... magic markers are the bird equivalent of Preparation H for clubgoers? [AP]

The demented incompetents a the Port Authority are proceeding with plans to exterminate hundreds of cats at JFK, according to the Humane Society and Mayor's Alliance for NYC Animals. Various cat organizations have been trying, since 2004, to humanely control the feral animals, which live in a rusty truck near Delta's cargo area, but the Port Authority never gave them permission to start neutering the animals, a technique that swiftly reduced cat populations at Rikers Island and elsewhere. The port has been "negotiating" with the Humane Society since August, but broke off talks on Memorial Day, presumably because it thought the disturbing news would get buried amid the holidays (that tactic only works in the days just before a big holiday, monsters). Instead the port insists on sending the cats to a better place, where they will all die:

A tipster—who insists in no uncertain terms that he is not "friends" with the former governor of New Jersey and noted Gay American—forwards us this adorable image of Jim McGreevey's brand-new puppies. Sooo cute! Unfortunately, Dina Matos will sell them all to a puppy fur-obsessed heiress and use the money to buy more helicopters. [Facebook]

Shit, I know this one. Paul! No, wait... Bhudda! [NYT]

Heroin? S&M sex? BORING. The real nugget of sadism behind the unearthed video of actress-turned-self-righteous-humanitarian Angelina Jolie in the UK's Sun is her blasé confession about—whoops!—kind of killing her pets. She's worse than Paris Hilton, who got in trouble for neglecting her many chihuahuas—and worst of all, young Jolie, filmed rambling on in what the Sun calls a "drug den," thinks her forgetfulness is really cute, grinning sheepishly as she recounts the pets she's killed over the years: "I had a dog and I ended up beating him, and he got sick and... I've hurt so many—I am just not a good animal person... I had a rabbit that died, too... a cage fell on him..."

Even though she insists on leaving them locked in closets to die, Paris Hilton has acquired another dog. Her 18th. The gum ball-headed socialite/heiress/whatever bought the animal at a pet store of all places. Puppy No. 18, we hardly knew ye. [CityRag]

Humanity's age-old quest to subdue nature is chronicled nowhere so epically as in cheesy Hollywood movies. And today Entertainment Weekly went ahead and chronicled that. A selection of classic screenshots follows.

CNN heartthrob Anderson Cooper devoted a couple minutes of his program to AN ADORABLE BEAR last night! Seriously. "Frankly I can watch this bear for hours," said Cooper. How does Anderson know so much about bears? His exciting answer to that question may be found in the attached clip! (We suspect he may be exaggerating the breadth of his knowledge.)

Who would have guessed that Martha Stewart's late dog Paws would look like this? We had her pegged as more of a Labrador person. But her doggie died, and she's grieving via a photoessay on her blog. It's a truly stark portrait of grief and the saddest thing ever.

Have you signed the petition against Guillermo "Habacuc" Vargas yet? He's the Costa Rican artist whose latest big exhibition featured him tying up a starving dog "without food and water under the words 'Eres Lo Que Lees' - 'You Are What You Read' - made out of dog biscuits while he played the Sandinista anthem backwards and set 175 pieces of crack cocaine alight in a massive incense burner." Some reports say the dog starved to death during the display; the gallery director says that's not true. Either way, Vargas is not a popular man with animal lovers. By now, more than a million people have signed a petition (you can sign here, if you're so inclined) urging that he not be allowed to recreate the work, and the cause continues to draw media coverage and generate new outrage. But the artist calls his opponents hypocrites. His defense, and a video of the exhibit in question (which is pretty heartbreaking), after the jump.