Goldie has a spacious apartment in Prospect Park West, loves salad, and gets pushed around in a fancy baby stroller. Goldie is also a 51-year-old tortoise.

Here's a video of a little house cat locked in a standoff with an alligator. It gets heated and the paws come out. And though the gator gets some backup, it's not enough to contain the cat. Watch below!

In some ways she is! Lady knows how to open a movie, we'll give her that. She reigned supreme in an otherwise lackluster post-holiday weekend, mostly while we wait for the true fall releases (The Town, Friday) to enterain us.

After "dropping bombs that explode underwater and firing rubber bullets and bean bags from shotguns" failed to stop sea lions from getting hungry and eating salmon, wildlife officials have begun executing them, one by one.

A pair of lesbian albatrosses welcomed a male albatross into their home; he impregnated one, then flew away. The ladies took turns sitting on the egg and are now raising their gayby "the same as any male-female pair would."

Washington, D.C.'s Tai Shan and Atlanta's Mei Lan have been recalled to China (Did you know they retain inalienable ownership of all pandas, everywhere, forever?) to participate in their ancestral land's breeding program, and will leave next week.