Welcome to the Gawker Locker Room: where maturity goes to die! Here your host and toastmaster Furious George will present a topic of discussion for open commentary, vigorous debate, and potential masturbatory purposes. Our topics will be diverse, random, juvenile, and vitally important. Last week I stated my intention to make the Gawker Locker Room is a safe place for womyn and geighs. And to that end, I thought about asking a nice and cheeky question. Something along the lines of: "Which male Gawker personality is the most fuckable?" But then I realized that everyone would pick me, and furthermore, that they'd be correct. So that question was out the window. And then I got to skimmin' every damned comment in the previous Locker Room thread, hoping to stumble across some juicy subject matter. One topic came up more consistently than most: Anderson Cooper. But once again, I think he's far too easy a subject. "Would you fuck Anderson Cooper?" has only one correct answer, and even I'm not ashamed to admit it. Besides, ol' Andy gets too much attention these days. Surely there are dozens, if not baker's dozens, of up-and-coming hunks and hotties lurking in Anderson's shadow. Why do we never discuss them? Why do we leave them of our greeting cards, our love letters, our interpretive watercolors, our one-act plays, our slash fiction, our self-administered tattoos, and our court orders? Do not they - the slavishly hard-working, the impressively credentialed, the hopelessly credible - deserve to be objectified? And so I ask you all: Which cable news hottie (male or female) is the most underrated, and why? Update: Commenter fiveinchtaint's Allison Williams link is totally NSFW.

Bashful Anderson Cooper startled CNN medical correspondent Sanjay Gupta with a probing question on how steroids might affect one's, err, "bits and pieces." The coquettish CNN anchor later apologized for "my... ridiculous question," but the noted gym nut was probably just asking on behalf of a "friend," right? Watch Anderson blush afer Gupta says "man's testes:"

Harris Poll asked TV viewers, both Democrat and Republican, to name their favorite and least liked news personalities. The results of the survey, crunched and displayed on our chart, are fascinating.

The trim, silver-haired news anchor is the host of Anderson Cooper 360 and the hard-hitting daytime gab-fest Anderson. He's also one of the most prominent gay men on TV.

Poor sad Anderson Cooper. He guest hosted Live! With Regis & Kelly this morning (Regis was out) and he and Kelly got into a discussion about the Super Bowl and Super Bowl parties. The CNN anchor and almost definite gay person admits that he doesn't like parties at all because he's "a complete loser." Aww blubber blubber blubber. You know what was cute when you were 19 and awkward that isn't cute when you are rich, famous, good looking and talking to a robot made by the Frito-Lay corporation (Ripa)? Self-deprecating crap like this. You like parties, Anderson. Just not the kind you can talk about on this show.

New York magazine hints around at Shepherd Smith's gayness as best it can in a Q&A today with the Fox anchor. What's hanging above his couch? "Nothing, nobody," Smith answers. And the last Broadway show he saw? The magazine's 2005 profile of CNN anchor Anderson Cooper carried some heavy subtext as well. "Cooper couldn't have looked more put-together in his impeccably modern black suit, crisp pink shirt, and perfectly knotted purple-and-blue tie," it read. A pink shirt! And crisp, no less! Whatever could they be implying? Enough, we say, it's 2008 for God's sakes, a news anchor can be whoever he wants to be. Test your gaydar against ours after the jump as we rate five top news hosts' homosexuality using five video clips and a terribly loose interpretation of the Kinsey Scale.

A salivating Gawker Stalker spots Anderson looking yummy: " Saw The Coop himself with a posse of guys last night at the Kathy Griffin show in a tight t-shirt and baseball cap. He looked great - huge arms and a big smile. Silver-haired perfection."

The Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation has announced the nominees for their 19th annual GLAAD Media Awards. Our beloved Anderson Cooper is nominated for his story on gay homeless teens (and for being so dreamy). Odds on America's Favorite Mostly Closeted Anchor attending the ceremony slightly better than odds on Matt Cassel starting for the Patriots in the Super Bowl. [GLAAD]

A Gawker Stalker spots the closeted CNN anchor in a quintessentially gay location in New York's Chelsea. "Mon. 1/21 6:15 pm AC in the Vitamin Shoppe @ 8th & 23rd. Must he ALWAYS wear the same outfit?! Sheesh. He's in the neighborhood often (David Barton Gym?) and in the same old jeans, blue polo, jacket, baseball cap every time. Sorry I didn't notice what he was buying on my way out. Any guesses?"

Last night Anderson Cooper, CNN's prettiest anchor, investigated that infamous video of Tom Cruise on Tom Cruise, Scientologist. His correspondent talked to a former member of the church and took us deep into the world of strange symbols and acronyms and claims made by America's favorite tiny grinning superstar actor. Then Cooper replayed a contentious interview with Scientology's head Inquisitor into the crimes of Psychology. Cooper even called the religion a fraud based on pseudo-science (or at least pointed out that that is a "criticism leveled against Scientology"). What's Anderson's beef with LRH?

PT: "Sat in first class with AC360 on the 445 from ATL to LGA. Tight jeans, super-tight polo, ballcap pulled low, and a steely-eyed, sucked-in cheek expression. Totally gay in that military way where the straight army guys were posing for that homo website I saw on the news."

This is either the strangest regional accent I've heard on cable news, or one of the best TV bloopers of the campaign. A CNN commentator, interviewed by Anderson Cooper, intended to predict that the nomination would be "hard-fought". It came out "a hard-fart nomination." The clip, after the jump. Wait till 00:31 into the video.

We honestly don't know who at CNN had the brass cojones to sign off on the pairing of Kathy Griffin and Anderson Cooper to host their 2008 countdown festivities, but if this seven-minute clip is any indication, we just may have witnessed the birth of a New Year's Eve tradition. Like a glass-closeted Dean Martin and fag-hag Jerry Lewis, Griffin & Cooper elevated the art of ball-drop-anticipatory comedic banter to new heights. (Kathy: "My balls are freezing." Anderson: "We have some eggnog in the truck." Kathy: "Well I've got to watch my figure— I'm not like you." Anderson: "Don't worry, I'm not watching your figure either." *Gay rimshot!*)

Regis had the morning off, so CNN heartthrob Anderson Cooper filled in with Kelly Ripa on "Live with Regis and Kelly." He's not quite cut out for it! In the clip above, he does everything in his well-toned power to prevent Kelly from touching him. And what red-blooded American male wouldn't do the same? Cheap laughs at everyone's expense!

You cannot possibly have missed the relentless ads for CNN's October "Planet in Peril" documentary, a four-hour eco-soap starring Anderson Cooper, Dr. Sanjay Gupta, and (of course!) Animal Planet's Jeff Corwin, the impoverished man's Steve Irwin. The "CNN Worldwide Investigation" (oooh...heavy) took a year to complete, cost the network some serious change, and was hailed as its first high-definition documentary, following the fall launch of CNN-HD. Too bad that sister-company Time Warner neglected to get with the freaking program already—the largest cable provider in New York and LA still doesn't carry CNN in high-definition.

Anderson Cooper's appearance on Sesame Street's news network GNN is the André Gide's Si le grain ne meurt of children's television: A text forcing the issue of—let's call it "identity"?—into the public discourse. Speaking from a trashcan (self-loather!), Cooper introduces the letter G. What words start with "g" that might be germane for Cooper? Giggle. Goo. Gastroenteritis? Keep going!

Last night on Conan O'Brien, beloved silver-haired hurricane foe Anderson Cooper told a charming story about a defining moment in every young boy's life: Getting cosmetic surgery with your legendary socialite mom. Don't worry, Anderson's still real. He kept the "fatty deposit" under his eye (it adds character!). The whole thing is alarming, though. Does America really want to see Anderson's every flaw? Will HD ruin the magic? Can't they smear a little Vaseline on the lens and film him like a 30s movie starlet until we're all ready to deal with his imperfections?

America's boyfriend, CNN newsman Anderson Cooper, appeared on "The View" today. He discovered what so many of us have found—that you really just get caught up in the spirit of the place when you're hanging with the gals! Although? We're not yet ruling out that he's a master of sarcasm.

"Dan Rather, whose career at CBS News ground to an inglorious end 15 months ago over his role in an unsubstantiated report questioning President Bush's Vietnam-era National Guard service, filed a $70 million lawsuit this afternoon against the network, its corporate parent and three of his former superiors." Plus! "'Mr. Rather is the most experienced reporter in the United States in covering hurricanes,' his lawyers write in the suit." Poor Anderson! [NYT]

"CNN is permanently shifting to taped programming for the second hour of "Anderson Cooper 360," scaling back an ambitious programming block created in 2005 to showcase the studio and field-reporting talents of Cooper, who it viewed as an emerging star." Uh oh! [Variety] UPDATE: Meouch, CNN is calling Variety all kinds of wrong on this one.