While the WGA picket lines that have become important stops for local tour-bus drivers looking to show visitors to our fine city the stalled dream-making factories where their favorite films and television shows were once made have generally featured enough exciting musical performances, adorable striking babies, and occasional attempted vehicular manslaughters to keep their paying customers entertained, the protests have thus far lacked the A-list star power the public expects from such large-scale Hollywood productions. Today's LAT wonders why the cream of the showbusiness crop has yet to join the pizza-proferring efforts of lesser (read: TV-based) lights in showing solidarity with the WGA's cause:

· The looming threat of a strike-induced cancellation of the Golden Globes ceremony has thrown the party-planning world into chaos: How can anyone commit half a million bucks to fill a venue with chocolate fountains, imposing mounds of peeled shrimp, and ice sculptures of prohibitive best actor favorite Daniel Day Lewis when there's a chance the whole night might be called off? [Variety]
· The WGA has granted a waiver for the Independent Spirit Awards (to be hosted by Guild member Rainn Wilson), freeing the show's organizers from the stomach-churning stress being suffered by their writerless Globes counterparts. [THR]

With Conan, Jay, Jimmy, and the rest of the late night gang announcing they're reluctantly headed to back to work without their striking writers, it seemed inevitable that Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert wouldn't be far behind. They've released this joint statement on their January 7th return: "We would like to return to work with our writers. If we cannot, we would like to express our ambivalence, but without our writers we are unable to express something as nuanced as ambivalence." A more disappointed than ambivalent WGA has already issued a reminder that writerless versions of the shows aren't going to fill the Colbert and Stewart-shaped holes in our lives: "Comedy Central forcing Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert back on the air will not give the viewers the quality shows they've come to expect. The only way to get the writing staffs back on the job is for the AMPTP companies to come back to the table prepared to negotiate a fair deal with the Writers Guild." [AP, WGA.org]

· The Writers Guild has decided to picket the Golden Globes, a move that may make the decision to skip the ceremony easier for conflicted members of SAG. However, the possibility is raised that WGA protestors could be set up far enough away from the Beverly Hilton's entrance that actors who decide to attend could be spared the shame of physically crossing a picket line. [Variety]
· Meanwhile, organizers for the Globes scramble to figure out how to put on a show without writers, while talent awaits official word on whether or not they should cancel their table reservations in solidarity—a "topic so sensitive that a number of publicists — including Alan Nierob, who reps Mel Gibson and Steve Martin — wouldn't even comment about why their clients weren't commenting." [THR]

The AMPTP, while still officially suspicious of the newfangled, profit-deficient internets that have cleaved their precious Hollywood in twain, continues to take bold leaps forward in adapting its once embarrassingly outdated web presence into a tool that will better serve their information-disseminating needs. The studio collective-bargaining group has now not only modestly overhauled the site's entire design (even their much-derided logo has received a minor touch-up), but added the twin extravagances of a second Doomsday Ticker™— this one showing what the strike is costing union crew members—and an intermittently ungrammatical "The Average WGA Writer Makes More Than These Highly Paid Smiling White Guys Box."

With not even the prospect of some rousing Christmas-themed pickets (we think that the briefly spitballed "March of 1,000 Angry Santas" in front of the Warner Bros. lot would've been a winner) to look forward to during a planned holiday protesting hiatus, a frustrated WGA has decided to take action to compel the studios to return to the bargaining table they walked away from last Friday. In a just-issued press release, the Guild indicates that it's filed charges with the National Labor Relations Board decrying the "illegal demands" the AMPTP has set as a precondition for resuming talks, and also reveals that it's petitioned the agency for an immediate injunction against studio bogeyman Nick Counter, whom they have good reason to believe has plans to "quietly lower himself down the chimneys of slumbering Guild families, set fire to the lovingly wrapped presents beneath their Christmas trees, and then steal away into the night, greedily gobbling the delicious snacks their children had left for St. Nicholas." The press release follows after the jump:

Once again turning to the revenue-deficient wasteland of the internet to get its message out to the public, the negotiation-averse AMPTP posts a reminder about how much money the Guild is costing everybody while its members mock up hurtful websites and grab-ass with Mr. Sulu on the picket line. That Doomsday Ticker never stops spinning! "Then, someone from the WGA offices happily distributed the link to a hijacked parody website that even many rank-and-file WGA members felt was over-the-top. All of this is happening right along with the WGA's continuing series of concerts, rallies, mock exorcisms, pencil-drops and Star Trek-themed gatherings. Amidst this alternating mix of personal attacks and picket line frivolity, we must not forget that this WGA strike is beginning to cause serious economic damage to many people in the entertainment business." [AMPTP.org]

Obviously affected by yesterday's launch of AMPTP.com, some striking writers' hurtful commentary on the 1994-era design of the studio coalition's web presence, the organization today unveiled the kind of "widget" that the kids demand from their favorite blogotubes: a Doomsday Ticker™ relentlessly tabulating the amount of money their calculations say the WGA is futilely burning upon the pyre of protest.

· Sean Penn's Into the Wild leads the Broadcast Critics Association awards nominations with seven nods, including best picture, director, actor, and writer. Meanwhile, the contrarian critics of San Francisco name Brad Pitt's little-seen outlaw-tone-poem The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford their best of the year. [Variety, Variety · ABC pulls last three episodes of Big Shots from the air despite its rapidly expiring supply of fresh scripted programming, handing its cushy, post-Grey's Anatomy timeslot to repeats of Private Practice. [THR]

A press release from the "AMPTP" that landed in our inbox a little while ago invited us investigate the real reason that the studios had to break off negotiations Friday evening with a Writers Guild hellbent on destroying Hollywood with its greedy pursuit of a fair deal: to focus on a much-needed upgrade of AMPTP.com, the organization's minimalist web presence.

During the media blackout that accompanied the resumed post-Thanksgiving negotiations between the writers and studios, no news was good news, allowing Hollywood a brief—and, as it turns out, completely misguided—sense of hope that things might get settled before the holidays. As Day 36 of the strike begins and despair engulfs the industry anew, a round-up of the latest thoroughly depressing developments in the ongoing labor Armageddon:

The AMPTP's recent retention of a new PR firm to help them more effectively communicate to the public why the intransigent, greedy WGA should accept the incredibly generous terms of their groundbreaking New Econonic Partnership is paying immediate dividends; while the organization's previous attempt to have studio head Roger A. Trevanti explain the Companies' position was amateurish, unfocused and openly hostile, under the supervision of their new-media-savvier publicity team, their latest effort is a great leap forward.

The media blackout that accompanied the resumption of contract talks between the WGA and the AMPTP forced our Hollywood StrikeWatch round-up into a brief hiatus, but as the two sides have decided it's time to start talking to the press again, we can put our bullet-pointed morning show back into production:

Though the super-secret contract talks that WGA and AMPTP officials are currently conducting in a hidden, maximum-security bunker inside a hollowed-out section of hillside behind the Hollywood sign seems to have temporarily inspired feelings of "cautious optimism" in members of the warring factions who've been starved for hope entering this fourth week of the strike, we fear a major setback is in the offing.

· With talks between the WGA and AMPTP resuming this morning, a Variety strike poll reveals that respondents believe that the Writers Guild is doing a much better job of "representing its side of the battle more forcefully and more clearly" than the studios. Indeed, the Companies might have to resort to having lead negotiator Nicholas "J. Nicky 3" Counter star in his own "Studio Boi" video if they hope to keep pace with their adversaries' latest, cutting-edge attempt at virally spreading their message. [Variety]

Over the Thanksgiving holiday weekend, Deadline Hollywood Daily is debuting a series of "Speechless" videos, in which an impressive roster SAG actors (Holly Hunter! Harvey Keitel! David Schwimmer?) , take to these revenue-deficient internets to silently express their solidarity with their WGA peers. Especially mesmerizing is yesterday's clip of the always-outspoken Sean Penn, who, forced into a rare silence by the ongoing strike, seems to calmly mouth a threat to unseen AMPTP negotiators, warning them that he'll be waiting outside Monday's revived contract talks ready to beat some sense into anyone who refuses to bargain in good faith.

The picketers (and, we suspect, pretty much everyone else who works in Hollywood) are off for the day and en route to wherever they're celebrating Thanksgiving, but we've still got enough links for one last pre-holiday round-up:

· The studios once again take a shot at getting their side of the ongoing contract dispute onto the YouTubes, this time wisely choosing a more persuasive messenger than Leave the AMPTP Alone Guy.
· Bill Nye the Science Guy vs. His Fake, Gardening-Poisoning Wife.
· The paparazzi are failing to show proper respect for the pregnant Christina Aguilera's baby-making parts.
· Report: Britney Spears devirginized at 14—and not by Justin Timberlake. Your world has officially been rocked.

As Hollywood prepares to bury those still-nagging feelings of labor-strife-related dread in turkey, stuffing, and sweet potatoes, here's the morning's round-up of strike news:

As Hollywood breathes a collective—if cautious—sigh of relief following some happy weekend news, here's the morning round-up of StrikeWatch news: