Today's Page Six went oddly deep on Ahmadinejadmania, airing complaints from an Iranian restaurant-owning fellow about being quoted in AMNY. "KAZ Bayati, owner of popular Persian eatery Persepolis, is afraid for his life after being incorrectly 'outed' as a supporter of Holocaust-denying Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad," blares the oddball gossip sheet. Only the thing is—AMNY didn't print the guy's last name, at his request. But Page Six did. So who's getting innocent people jailed and dismembered now, Richard Johnson? Ya big drama queen.

"And to the rest of the Columbia University students: What was with the uncomfortable silence after my joke about nuclear weapon-seeking leaders being retards? Was there a translation issue? That joke kills in Iran! Then again, in Iran, there does not exist the phenomenon of retards. In America, I hear that you have one as your leader! Hahahahaha!!! (In Iran, there would be immense laughter.) I want to go home." [Note to MSNBC: This is not a real quote, don't recycle it in a story.] [NewsGroper]

Iran's President Ahmadinejad probably doesn't get out much with the common people, so he's probably missing all the hot gay action in and out of Tehran. For starters, Cruising for Sex suggests checking out the park by the city theater at Vali Asr and Enghelab—right in the middle of everything, and tourist-friendly too!

You've read about Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad's famous "we don't have any homosexuals" routine, but you really need to see it performed live at his Columbia University gig to get the full effect: It's all in the delivery. As a bonus, he also breaks into his bit on women, which has the absolutely hilarious part about how Iranian women are so respected—How respected are they?—Iranian women are so respected that they're exempt from legal responsibilities. This guy kills us.

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad: "In Iran we don't have homosexuals like in your country. We don't have that in our country. In Iran we do not have this phenomenon. I don't know who has told you that we have it." Weird! Who stars in their reality shows then? [Ahmadinejad at Columbia]

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad: "Let me tell you a joke. I think these leaders, that are building nuclear bombs... they are retarded." Yes, that's the joke, people. [Time]

From the mailbag: "Broadway around Columbia is pandemonium. Protesters of every vein, including some pro-Ahmadinejad ones with posters saying "May Allah cast a mushroom cloud over Israel." Classy. No violence, yet, but i was hoping a cop would bash the head in of a whiny guy who needed to get through to get his books and didn't want to go around the 5-block police blockade."

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad: "In the teachings of the prophets, one reality shall always be attached to science: the reality of purity of spirit and good behavior. Knowledge and wisdom are pure and clear reality. Science is a light." Up at Columbia, Bwog says one student suggests that "Either he's stoned or the translator is." [NYT, Bwog]