advertisers

Climbing The Scaffolding With Our Advertisers

mark · 05/05/06 03:00PM

Time again for our Friday exultation of this week's sponsors, the finest group of companies, products, and/or services we've ever had the unparalleled pleasure of bullet-pointing below our thankful blurb. If you'd like to advertise on Defamer and receive a similarly hyperbolic kiss-up, see this page.

Our Sworn Declaration Of Advertiser Love

mark · 04/28/06 03:26PM

Join us in celebrating our eternal commitment to this week's sponsors, whom we would never attack in court, even if they consumed huge amounts of suspicious online porn and visited the occasional call girl. If you'd like to advertise on Defamer and buy our undying love, see this page.

Advertisers Move Us Spiritually, Powerfully

mark · 04/21/06 03:09PM

Join us as we raise our voices in unison to celebrate the munificence of this week's sponsors, who would happily supply us with ten Miracle Babies should our upcoming movie premieres demand the attention. If you'd like to advertise on Defamer and feel the warmth of our suspicious love, see this page.

Advertiser Love Lasts Forever

mark · 04/14/06 02:42PM

Please join us in burning the photographs and love letters given to us by our ex-advertisers, a show of devotion meant to demonstrate to this week's sponsors the totality of our current devotion. If you'd like to advertise on Defamer and earn similar expressions of ardor, see this page.

Advertiser African Beach House Romp

mark · 04/07/06 03:42PM

Time to snuggle up with this week's sponsors, any of whom we'd gladly shack up with in Namibia until our lovechild is born. If you'd like to advertise on Defamer and taunt incredibly good-looking and affluent consumers with your wares, see this page.

Advertiser Idol Worship

mark · 03/31/06 03:25PM

Join us in slaughtering the fatted calf in tribute to this week's sponsors, whom we worship with the fervor of a Kool-Aid gulping cult. If you'd like to advertise on Defamer and enjoy the same kind of amazing devotion, see this page.

Advertiser Toe-Stroke

mark · 03/24/06 03:01PM

It's time once again to lavish this week's sponsors' feet with a variety of scented oils in recognition of their important contributions to our cause. If you'd like to advertise on Defamer and get in line for a vigorous foot-worship session, see this page.

Rumors Of Advertiser Love Have Dogged Us For Years

mark · 03/17/06 04:07PM

Join us in celebrating our very public love for this week's sponsors, whom we would never disrespect with stories that we're dating other advertisers in Europe. If you'd like to buy a piece of our devotion by advertising on Defamer, see this page.