Gabrielle Bluestone · 04/06/14 09:58PM

Journalist and UNC professor Charles S. Stone, the founder of the National Association of Black Journalists, died today at age 89. According to the Washington Post, Stone was so trusted by readers of his Philadelphia Daily News column that "dozens of homicide suspects insisted on surrendering to him."

Hazel Cills · 04/06/14 04:35PM

A Boeing 747 was forced to make an emergency landing when the 390 cows on board were too hot for the plane to handle. After a fire alarm where the cows were kept started to sound and there was no evidence of smoke, technicians concluded the extremely sexy group of cows were giving off too much heat and set it off.

Incredibly Awkward Teacher Prank Is an April Fools Blessing

Kelly Conaboy · 04/06/14 02:45PM

Pranks are terrible and they should never, under any circumstance, be played on or by anyone. There is a forever increasing supply of evidence to show that April Fools' Day is a living nightmare. That said, this April Fools' Day prank is pretty good! Saying anything would spoil it — and spoilers are, of course, nearly as evil as pranks — so you'll just have to watch for yourself.

Activists Are Fighting to Drink Illegal Raw Milk

Hazel Cills · 04/06/14 10:40AM

Food activists and anti-regulation libertarians are fighting for their right to drink unpasteurized milk in peace, even though illnesses connected to drinking it are rising.

Hazel Cills · 04/06/14 08:53AM

A U.S. Navy warship reached the sailboat of a San Diego couple who had sent a satellite ping for help after their 1-year-old daughter developed a rash and fever, but wasn't responding to medications . The team stabilized the girl and pointed the ship, which had no steering or communication abilities, towards Mexico.

George R.R. Martin Stops by SNL's Weekend Update Desk

Kelly Conaboy · 04/06/14 08:15AM

The fourth season of Game of Thrones premieres tonight on HBO. (Have you heard of that show? People like it!) Ahead of the event, GOT author George R.R. Martin stopped by the Weekend Update desk at Saturday Night Live to discuss what has been keeping him from continuing the series.

Mentally Unfit

Zachary McDermott · 04/05/14 05:35PM

When the police found me I was standing on a subway platform, somewhere in Brooklyn, barefoot, wearing only soccer shorts in October, and crying. My hands were folded behind my head like a captured soldier. For the previous 12 hours I had wandered the streets of New York, convinced that I was being videotaped, Truman Show-style, by hidden cameras. I made my living as a public defender in Brooklyn, but I did standup at night. I'd recently met with a network executive to discuss a pilot for a reality show based on my act; now I thought the city was my set.

NASA's Moon-Orbiting LADEE Will Crash Land This Month

Kelly Conaboy · 04/05/14 04:30PM

NASA's moon-orbiting LADEE (Lunar Atmosphere and Dust Environment Explorer) spacecraft is expected to make a crash landing on the moon sometime this month, after having explored its thin atmosphere and lunar dust environment since October.

People See Jesus in Grilled Cheese Because They Want Justice

Hazel Cills · 04/05/14 03:52PM

When people see significant, often religious imagery in everyday images, from grilled cheese to their dog's butt, it's called "pareidolia." But as for exactly why people see divine figures like Jesus in things like potato chips and other ordinary objects, a recent study in the journal cognition says it is due to a phenomenon called "the moral pop-out effect."