Why doesn't anyone ever write about the real victims of the current war in Gaza? That's right, the losers and freaks of Second Life.

Chicago real estate mogul Steven Good, head of the "largest real estate auction company in the nation," killed himself with a gun yesterday. He did deals with Trump. His motivation is a mystery:

Among perennial nominees Tyler Perry, Will Smith and Queen Latifah, a flaxen-haired young star has emerged to stake her claim to NAACP Image Awards legend.

Considering Barack Obama offered the job of Surgeon General to CNN's Sanjay Gupta, it's only to be expected that some equally surprising political appointments would get bandied about. Here's another one you can add to the list: Rumor has it that Obama is thinking about naming Anna Wintour as his ambassador to England or France, at least according to the "extremely insider rumors" picked up by Fashion Week Daily. Excellent choice! Not only will it go a long way to restoring America's reputation on the European continent, it will functions as the perfect exit strategy for Anna as Vogue continues its downward descent!

Tonight is the premiere of The Real World: Brooklyn. Can you feel the electric tingle in the air? We can't either. So let's try to get some excitement building by making some predictions!

· Both sides in World War Watchmen, the WB Allies and the evil Fox Axis, have agreed to forego a jury trial. January 20, a federal judge decides the fate of the completed film.

• Vivienne Westwood may have designed Carrie's wedding dress for the first Sex and the City movie, but she'd like to write the script for the sequel, and she's even written to Sarah Jessica Parker to make her case. [Telegraph]
• Tracy Feith is the latest designer who has been tapped to do a line for Target. [WWD]
• Fern Mallis says IMG has confirmed 52 designers— including Calvin Klein, Donna Karan and Michael Kors—for Fashion Week in February. [WSJ]
• Marchesa will be showing, too. [Fashionista]
• Photos of Isaac Mizrahi's new collection for Liz Claiborne. [Pipeline]
• Go alert your mom: Carolina Herrera says long hair after 40 is "out" in her book. "Women need to learn how to age gracefully." [Times UK]

Unconspicuous consumption is the hot new thing. That $300 million megayacht? Tacky, what with the layoffs. Private jet? Forget about it, after Detroit's debacle. Even the celebrity goodie-bag business is endangered.

As shocked as we were by The Spirit being shut out of the Razzies, we're a little more surprised to see two of Hollywood's most high-profile writers snubbed in today's WGA nominations.

Guess the commercial real estate market hasn't cratered completely. The city's Parks Department has sold the vending rights for the north-side entrance of the Metropolitan Museum of Art at Fifth Avenue and 82nd Street for $362,201. [NYP via Curbed]

"Joe the Plumber" is going to war! Some website is paying him to go to Israel and talk about things he knows nothing about, specifically everything. We were so close to being rid of him!

The Top 10 mania that grips year-end film culture provides some of the most vulgar oversimplifications, abstractions, nonsense, critical self-regard and hype known to man. We've read the worst so you don't have to.

We're going to take a wild guess and say that Vivi Nevo and Zhang Ziyi's winter vacation was more exciting than yours. [X17, Xinhua]

• One sign we're in a recession: The Times published an article today on the joys of eating squirrel. Guess we'll see you in Central Park later tonight! [NYT]
• Frank Bruni calls Rouge Tomate "impressive" and gives it one star in today's New York Times, although he also reports the food "lacks punch." [NYT]
• Kefi has been shut down by the Department of Health. [Eater]
• Forge owners Marc Forgione and Christopher Blumlo are changing the name of their eatery to avoid a lawsuit by a similarly-named spot in Miami. [NYO]
• Brooklyn's Patois isn't closing after all; it's moving across the street. [Zagat]
• JoeDoe in the East Village is offering a new three-course, $35 prix fixe called the "Madoff menu." But where are the pork sausages? [GS]

Barbara Walters is just letting her passive-aggressive flag fly these days on The View, garnishing nearly every "Hot Topics" segment with a cruel, cutting barb that her dunderheaded cohosts are powerless to rebut.

One person you probably didn't expect to be profiting from Bernie Madoff's $50 billion Ponzi scheme: Fabiola Beracasa! The oft-photographed social butterfly has a day job, in case you were unaware: She's the creative director of CIRCA, the estate jewelry company where "Madoff-related jewels had been incoming all month, like expensive shrapnel," according to the current issue of The New Yorker. Fabiola's boss, Chris Del Gatto (left), says his company has been inundated with precious pieces since news of the scandal broke, which he then proceeds to prove to reporter Lizzie Widdicombe by dumping a manila envelope filled with "the day's harvest from Palm Beach"—more than $250,000 worth of jewels—on a desk. Del Gatto is quick to point out that he isn't a "pirate" for profiting off desperate sellers. (If anything, his outfit here strikes as "safari guide" more than anything else.) And he adds that his firm has since had to assume the role of "priest, rabbi, and psychiatrist" to help distraught Madoff investors cope with the loss of family heirlooms. It's a role we imagine Fabiola has settled into quite nicely considering her first-hand experience with the subject.

Entertainment Tonight's Mary Hart has just about had it with these smarty-pants actresses like Anne Hathaway. Whatever happened to your Loni Andersons? Your Lydia Cornells? Your Barbi Twins?

Because every excellent, original TV series must have an inferior ripoff on another network: forget Mad Men, the new advertising-centric drama is Trust Me. On TNT! Your new Don Draper: that guy from Ed.

If you've been waiting for video of Walter and Monica Noel in all their glory, Business Sheet has a clip of the Madoff enablers from a 2000 British documentary called The Man Who Bought Mustique. Bonus: Wait until the end of the clip and you'll hear the subject of the film describe the couple as "worms" and "frightfully badly behaved snobs." [Business Sheet]