Much of the country did manage to witness the offending digit-extension (above), however. That in turn elicited 18 separate complaints to the FCC from outraged Americans—citizens not all that different from you or us, save for their distaste for Aronosfky's obscene (but artistically assured) hand gesture. From the LAT:

[Actress Chloë Sevigny at the "Big Love" premiere in Los Angeles last night; image via WENN]

A couple of weeks ago, the Post's Keith Kelly reported that execs at Condé Nast were growing increasingly concerned about the company's bloated Web budget. Well, it looks like they've figured out one way to trim costs: recycle content from other publications! Last fall, The Daily published a chart of famous fashion figures ideally suited to top jobs in the new administration. Today, Style.com published... a chart of famous fashion figures ideally suited to top jobs in the new administration. It's very nice to see that both The Daily and Style.com agree that Donna Karan should be Secretary of Health of Human Resources. She really would be a perfect fit. (We've always thought mandatory Kabbalah classes in public schools is just what this country needs right now.) The idea of Donatella Versace as Secretary of Defense (The Daily), or Karl Lagerfeld as Secretary of Transportation (Style.com)? Fortunately, both are foreign citizens, so you don't have to worry about those scenarios just yet.

We all know Bernie Madoff scammed people out of billions, for years. What about his immediate family members, who were all working for him? Essential facts below:

Maybe Jeremy Piven isn't off the mercury—after all, his attempt to justify his recent behavior to Good Morning America was oilier than a soy sauce-slathered eel roll.

Sundance affords as many opportunities for career setbacks in 10 days as it does for meteoric advancement — not even Robert De Niro or Dakota Fanning could get out of Park City alive.

A very not-mercury-poisoned-looking Jeremy Piven, who quit his high-profile Broadway show Speed-the-Plow using the old too much sushi excuse, managed to drag himself out of bed at dawn to go on Good Morning America today. Feh.

My name is Joshua David Stein. I write a hugely influential weekly column for Gawker.com about the television show Top Chef.

Yes, it's blindingly obvious, but if you're currently unemployed you can take comfort in the fact that researchers have condemned open-plan offices, where "noise, overcrowding and invasion of privacy... can lead to exhaustion, high blood pressure and even the flu." Squeezy balls, breathing techniques, and hanging a nice painting to look at are some of the measures suggested for warding off fantasies of murder-suicide, although coming to work lightly drunk, stoned, or otherwise tranquilized might help too.

• Gannett, the largest newspaper publisher in the U.S., is forcing thousands fo employees to a week of unpaid leave. [NYT]
• The NYT-owned Boston Globe is cutting its staff by 12 percent. [NYT]
• Penthouse is laying off staff. [Portfolio]
• Newspapers are saving money by outsourcing foreign news coverage. [WSJ]
• Hope you're interested in reading lots more about Bernie Madoff. There are a total of eight books about him now in the pipeline. [NYO]
• Here's something you didn't expect to hear: A recent study finds that commercials actually make watching TV more enjoyable. [AdFreak]

So, oh dear. They decided to air another episode of that Real World: Brooklyn business. Yeah, I know! Weird. Anyway. I have things to say about it. Read after the j. (That means "jump"!)

In 2005, Matt Taibbi wrote a takedown of NYT mouthbreather Tom Friedman's unique idiocy that remains the greatest thing ever written about the mustachioed private-jet-frequent-flyer. Now Taibbi has a new piece; top ten anti-'stache material.

Charles Barker (Swayze), a FBI agent, trains rookie partner, Ellis Dove (Travis Fimmel) in a hard-edged, psychologically driven approach towards undercover work. DEEP UNDERCOVER WHO CAN YOU TRUST. Series Premiere TONIGHT on A&E 10/9C

Jerry and Jessica Seinfeld heading into the Waverly Inn, where they had dinner with Madonna and Gwyneth Paltrow ... Paul McCartney signing autographs on the street ... Liev Schreiber pushing son Alexander in a stroller and carrying groceries ... Agyness Deyn walking in the East Village with a cup of coffee ... Blake Lively and Penn Badgley on the set of Gossip Girl ... Heather Mills shopping with daughter Beatrice and boyfriend Jamie Walker ... and Salma Hayek arriving at JFK with daughter Valentina.

[Submit your own Gawker Stalker sightings to stalker@gawker.com] Jan. 15 @ 9am I ran into Liev Schreiber at Whole Foods. The funniest part was the reaction of the stockboys waiting near the entrance.

For years, men who made the very personal decision to pop their collars—sometimes while gettin dollars—have been ridiculed. But now the august Wall Street Journal officially declares that collar-poppin is not "foppish" a bit!

Per the Times today, we're pleased to present you with a very tasty stop on the Bernie Madoff Tour of Manhattan, the restaurant Primola on the Upper East Side. According to the owner, the Madoffs turned up here once or twice a week for the past 22 years, always insisting on a "quiet table in the back." And while there are no pork sausages on the menu—Bernie's favorite—New York has great things to say about the veal scallopine and bistecca fiorentina perfumed with rosemary, garlic, and olive oil.

The rumored Lily van der Woodsen as a teen Gossip Girl spin-off is going to happen. It will be set in Los Angeles in the 80's, at "the height of the Valley Girl craze."

We've all been there: stuck in the uncomfortable position of having to make conversation with an African-American friend, colleague, or husband. Ugh, so awkward. What could we possibly talk about? New answer: Barack Obama!

Today we have a guy who got a blowjorb while having a chat with a fellow, a caddish virginity loser, a secret plastic surgery fan, and something about what, I'm guessing, is The Mentalist.