Meet Michael Ignatieff, likely the next Prime Minister of Canada. He enjoys Twittering, reading, writing and leading a nation of 33 million. His nickname is Iggy. All Hail Iggy!

Small songstress Lilly Allen Wears Bo-Peep Costume, Exposes Curds and Whey [Daily Mail]

Swimmer savant Michael Phelps caught taking a monster bong hit by News Of the World. Safe to say his Olympic career is donezo.

Something that is very enjoyable for me is watching how different YouTube users choreograph to one particular song. This week I looked up that song Low by Flo-Rida

When President Obama was sworn in, Aretha Franklin's hat appeared to sing My Country Tis of Thee. Ms. Franklin, not a small woman, disappeared under its heft.

Shouty McFucking Idiot Keith Olbermann is in Tampa Bay for the Superbowl. The good news is that the roar of the crowd might drown out his voice. The bad news is it might not. On last night's show, something strange happened, he was inadvertently informative.

Gee, that was quick. Mere hours after Google totally wigged out ZOMG, this guy from India is imploring us to buy his historic screen capture.

Sony has "won" the right to make Angelology into a movie. For those of you who don't know, and really who the fuck would know this, Angelology is a book about angels.

You know what sucks? Dying the same week as John Updike. The obits are like Updike this and Updike that. To be overshadowed in death is the bitter fate of the wonderful journalist Malcolm MacPherson

Developing: George, the half-brother of Barack Obama, was arrested in Nairobi for possession of illegal drugs. The dude had one joint!

New York, NY—"This site may harm your computer." That was the chilling message with which internet users were greeted for nearly twenty minutes this morning when they searched Google.com [GOOG]. Widespread panic ensued.

Attractive blonde piranha Elisabeth Hasselbeck is pregnant again. She and her husband Tim Hasselbeck already have two kids, Grace, 3, and Taylor, 1. Now a third is coming. Oh lord, make it stop!

Gaunt Jewish mysticist Madonna is bringing her Guy-less brood back to New York where she looks to ruin the marriage of Brooklyn Cyclone's mascot Sandy the Seagull. [ES]

Defamer's Week in Review: We learned the true meaning of friends, family and being fine with ourselves. Share our lessons after the jump, and have a great weekend!

· A local news team breaks the shocking story of toys that speak the phrase, "Islam is the light." (Or possibly "grrbbllgrbblliite.") We suspect the furry, freedom-hating hand of Cookie bin Monster is behind this.

After this arduous week of battletweeting, it's time for the commenters who've done the best job to sit back and uncork some congratulatory Vitamin Water. Don't worry, kids: we've spiked it. So who won?

Friday · Ultimate unisex Journey tribute band Infinity—with members from L.A. bands like Longstocking and Patsy and led by Steve Perry-channeling Michelle "Woody" Stevenson—plays Spaceland. Start believin'.

LAT to California: Drop Dead [Reuters]

Here they are: your Puppy Bowl V starting lineup. Hopes and expectations are high for all-pro puppyback Eli, coming off another phenomenal year compiling over 4,800 yards passing, 39 touchdowns with only seven waterbowl interceptions.

[A view of the Coney Island amusement park Astroland today; after closing for the final time last Labor Day, its lease expires tomorrow. Image via Getty]