Billy Mays died from heart disease, but final autopsy reports cite cocaine was a contributing factor in the TV ad-man's death, AP reports.

The Air Force announced the creation of a new "consolidated" nuclear command today. Well actually, they briefed reporters on it Wednesday, but asked them to embargo it until today. Why? Because yesterday was the 64th anniversary of Hiroshima.

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The Kreepie Kats miss Ben Silverman, Twitter, and John Hughes. And Frasier. After the jump: the Kreepie Kats Summer Blockbuster Red Band Teaser Trailer #1! Forward it to all your friends!

• David Chang's empire is about to get bigger. The Times confirms the rumor that the man behind Momofuku plans to open a French-Vietnamese spot in the former Town space in the Chambers Hotel sometime this fall. [NYT, TFB]
• The beer garden at Standard Hotel is now open. [UrbanDaddy]
• Andrew Carmellini is perfectly happy that Locanda Verde got two stars from the Times recently: "[T]he reviews have been exactly what we wanted." [W]
• Le Cirque founder Sirio Maccioni's favorite person this week? That would probably be the president of the Philippines, Maria Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo, who showed up with her entourage and dropped $20,000 on dinner. [P6]

A sperm bank in California is now allowing clients to choose an anonymous donor based on how much he resembles a particular celebrity. Want to be impregnated by a man who may (or may not!) look like Ben Affleck, currently the most searched-for celeb at the clinic? You now have that option! But don't expect any guarantees. Explains an employee of the sperm bank: "The goal was not to say you can have a baby that looks like Bob Saget," Brown said. "The goal was to say this donor happens to resemble this celebrity." Bob Sagat? Now that donor is going to be a busy man. [CNN]

We've written about nerdcore anthems before, including this rap about the SXSW internet conference, the one about the Hadron Collider and the one from the O(nline)G threatening to shank a Wired writer. With few exceptions, the genre has been dominated by geeks, which is why it's nice to see Kate Miller-Heidke get righteous on a creepy, Facebooking ex.

Doug Liman, the notoriously dickish director of The Bourne Identity, rescued three people from drowning after a boat accident in the Hudson River on Wednesday while tooling around in his sailboat.

Charles Perez is a purportedly Hottt Miami news anchor—or should we say 'was???' First, his personal email about his 'gender identity issues' got leaked to everybody at work, and now he's been fired! For unrelated reasons, allegedly.

This is sort of unfortunate, but not really. A federal appeals court today decided the news media will not be permitted access to the wiretaps that were used to bust Emperors Club VIP, the escort agency that employed Ms. Ashley Dupre and brought Eliot Spitzer's political career to a messy end last March.

The Boston Globe will start charging for its website. The good news doesn't stop!

Twitter continues to be flaky today. Par for the course on the overcrowded microblogging service, right? But Twitter claims it is the victim of elaborate hack attacks that "appear to have been geopolitical in motivation." That's actually true!

Fox News posted an astonishing 50% jump in profit last quarter amid a disastrous advertising recession, and it's basically the only thing making money in Rupert Murdoch's empire. Why? Because the GOP has cratered.

Oh, look, a picture of Bill O'Reilly's Valentine to Obama. Look at that hilarious multiculti group of kids he is with! Is this a college admissions brochure? FreeRepublic commenters are making loofah jokes! (Adorable, guys, but it's "falafel.") [Mediaite]

Listicle publication Forbes says that the US Military Academy, of all places, is "America's Best College." Is that even allowed? Competitor listicle publication the Princeton Review has struck back with its own outrageously outside-the-box college ranking listicle items!

This week's zing captures the essence of a mother's love. And the crapload of guilt their kids get as a special bonus. Inspired by the release of reporters Ling and Lee, commenter LatestBy sums it up in one exasperated sigh.

How weird! A regular plain-old concerned citizen shouting about health care socialism at a Democratic congressman's town hall turned out to be a former vice-chairman of the county Republican party. And she worked for the member's opponent! Crazy coincidence, right?

• The New York Times Co. is now publicly shopping the Boston Globe. Meanwhile, the list of potential acquirers is getting longer: The firm that bought the San Diego Union-Tribune is now a possible buyer. [AP, NYT]
• Related: The Globe is going to start charging to access its Web site. [E&P]
• News Corp. and GE were hoping to "ratchet down the rhetoric" when they ironed out a peace pact between MSNBC and Fox News recently. Keith Olbermann didn't abide by it, of course. (And Bill O'Reilly returned the compliment.) But Olbermann is still pretending it never happened. [WP, HP]
• It seems one embarrassment this week wasn't quite enough for Olbermann. Because he's resorting to shameless (and familiar) excuses to try and explain away the Richard Wolffe conflict-of-interest fiasco. [Gawker]
• Profits at CBS dropped by 96 percent in the second quarter. [WSJ]
• Why did Twitter go down yesterday? Blame the Russians. [NYT]