Endless joke/former Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin has posted her resume on the middle-aged person social networking site LinkedIn. On her
LinkedIn page, Palin says she's interested in "job inquiries," "business deals," and "getting back in touch."

As if Conde Nast didn't have enough to worry about: the New Guinea tribesmen suing the New Yorker for defamation now want a cool $45 million. Beware, reporters: Even your cab driver is lawyered up these days.

Rachel Weisz bundled up in the Village ... Roberto Cavalli walking on Madison Avenue with Serafina co-owner Fabio Granato ... Billy Joel and daughter Alexa walking uptown ... Rihanna filming a music video in Washington Heights and later heading into into a recording studio in Chelsea ... Miley Cyrus shooting scenes for Sex and the City 2 with Kim Cattrall in front of the Ziegfeld ... Paris Hilton posing for photographers after an appearance on The Wendy Williams Show ... Jon Gosselin and Hailey Glassman taking a carriage ride through Central Park ... Uma Thurman shopping at in SoHo ... and Sharon Osbourne and Cyndi Lauper shooting scenes for Celebrity Apprentice.

• A month after it was reported that Bernie Madoff's Montauk home had gone into contract, an unidentified buyer has closed on the purchase of the oceanfront manse. The five-bedroom, 3,000-square-foot home, which had been listed for $8.75 million, ended up selling for $9.41 million. [ABC, NYDN]
• Writer/director John Ridley has finally unloaded his condo at 15 Central Park West. The 2,237-square-foot pad, which Ridley bought for $6.65 million in July 2008 and listed for $13 million just a few days later, has sold for $8 million to a company listed in property records as Moral Hole LLC. [Cityfile]
• Oil exec Tom Edelman has placed his 11-room apartment at 770 Park Avenue back on the market, albeit for quite a bit less than when he last put it up for sale a year and a half ago. The eighth-floor co-op, which Edelman listed for $16.75 million after picking up a bigger apartment at 775 Park, is now being offered for $11 million with Brown Harris Stevens' John Burger. [NYT, BHS]
• Late fashion designer Abbijane Schifrin's former townhouse at 141 East 19th Street has gone on the market. The five-story manse, which is currently divided into two units, is listed for $8.75 million. [NYT, Sotheby's]

Were you, like us, a little perplexed last week when Mayor Bloomberg indicated that he planned to campaign this weekend with Rudy Giuliani by his side? One thing we didn't take into account (but which explains everything): If you'd like to engage in a little vintage NYC fear-mongering and race-baiting in the last few weeks of a campaign, there's really no better person out there to guide you. [NYT, previously]

Whitney Houston had a wardrobe malfunction and forgot about her own album. Paris Hilton craves shellfish. Akon wants his baby mama to be his Myspace friend. All that and more in your Monday Morning Gossip Roundup!

Jon Favreau turns 43 today. John Lithgow is turning 64. Retired boxer Evander Holyfield is 47. Former Saturday Night Live star Chris Kattan is turning 39. RNC chairman Michael Steele is 51. Model/actress Joy Bryant is turning 33. Trey Parker, the co-creator of South Park, is 40. Bestselling author John le Carré turns 78. Former first daughter Amy Carter is turning 42. TV psychic John Edward is 40. And the most famous carpenter in America, Extreme Home Makeover host Ty Pennington, turns 44 today.

• One of Madonna's neighbors has filed a lawsuit against their building's co-op board for not doing anything about the "pounding noise and vibration" emanating from Madge's triplex, which the neighbor says has been doubling as a "dance rehearsal studio." The good news is Madonna is moving in the near future, so the angry tenant should soon be able to go back to complaining about her other neighbor who just plays the radio too loud. [NYDN, AP]
• Lindsay Lohan avoided jail time but had her probation extended by a year last week when a judge ruled that she hadn't completed an alcohol treatment program. Then she went out to a party in the Meatpacking district this weekend and actually stayed sober. What a delightful surprise! [P6]
• Bethenny Frankel is engaged to her boyfriend of 11 months, Jason Hoppy. "She is very much a handful," Hoppy said, "She needs a man that can handle her, and that I can." More power to you, sir. [People]

Campus shrinks say a record number of college students are seeking treatment for mental health issues and that their problems are more severe than ever. Are the kids alright?

Iranian officials are blaming America for a terrorist attack in the Sistan-Baluchistan province. They're also vowing to take revenge on those responsible for the bombing. This could get ugly.

Barack Obama is telling the feds to stop, like, totally freaking out, man, and take it easy on medical marijuana.

Tonight, Draper's latest liason becomes more complicated. Peggy and Paul get competitive over accounts. Don and Betty are grateful that "Caller ID" has yet to be invented and Sterling Cooper goes up for sale.

Rush Limbaugh seemed to be enjoying himself in light of his triumphant article in the Wall Street Journal on Friday, reveling in his detractors admitting to using unattributed quotes to paint him as a racist. Was he rightfully vindicated? Not so fast.

Do you want to have Zach Galifianakis' babies? If you're the lesbian couple at the open of tonight's HBO series "Bored to Death" well, then you're in luck.

The hipster hype for "Where The Wild Things Are" was almost overbearing. The verdict, for one particular viewer was a "depressing existential" piece of cinema.

What's more dangerous, the Swine Flu or the Swine Flu vaccine? 'Depends who you ask. Proponent of alternative medicine Bill Maher tried to make his case again this weekend.

Tipsters report: the NY Daily News gossip' team's down one, as Laura Schreffler's out. Is the NYDN gossip desk growing rust? We know one person who turned the gig down. Update: Ben Widdicombe's on the move: TMZ!

Hot damn. Allen Salkin — the Seymour Hersh of the Sunday Styles section — hit the nail on the head this time. Salkin reviewed/profiled the DJ AM docu-show about addiction, and got some quotes. It's a teary, compelling affair.

OMG. Mad Men mad genius creator Matthew Weiner spoke at The New Yorker festival this weekend, and shared his brilliant brain with people in New York, and he probably said something amazing, right? Right. About? The Internet. Yes, The Internet.

So! They're not Jon and Kate Gosselin or Richard Heene and Co. But! Today is Michael Chabon day at the New York Times. A book, reviewed, and a two-page Styles profile! In which we learn: they factcheck with their kids?