Lindsay Lohan shopping at Intermix on Prince Street yesterday afternoon with her sister Ali (and causing a bit of a scene in the process) ... Angelina Jolie talking on her cell phone during a break from filming Salt ... Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz walking in Midtown with son Bronx ... former NFL player/coach Tony Dungy walking in Central Park on Sunday ... Scarlett Johansson signing autographs after a performance of A View From The Bridge at the Cort Theatre ... Jonah Hill walking up Broadway ... Tim Robbins watching a Rangers game with his son last week ... and Eva Longoria cheering on her husband at the Knicks-Spurs game at Madison Square Garden on Sunday night.

Well either this is without a doubt the biggest man on earth, or a really tiny drum set. Either way, he is really good at it, regardless of size. It's also probable that he absolutely shreds on the ukulele.

Watch the kids of PS22 sing an awesome version of Lady Gaga's 'Just Dance.' Those risers really bring back the memory of middle school choir rehearsal.

The Hollywood arms race to be the first actress with a Muslim baby is on, and there is one serious contender so far. Speaking of mommy issues, this actor has plenty of his own. As Freud said, blame the mother!

Somali pirates win the year! The edgy folk heroes of the high seas have seized a Greek cargo ship and a British tanker, closing out the year on a strong, piratey note. They're in the record books, folks!

• Fashion designer Georgina Chapman and her brother Edward, who serves as chief executive of her Marchesa fashion label, have paid $1.7 million for a condo at 99 Jane Street. Needless to say, it's highly unlikely Georgina and husband Harvey Weinstein are making plans to move into the two-bedroom condo, especially since they occupy a much larger townhouse nearby. It's believed Chapman either helped her brother buy the apartment, or they're planning to use it for visiting friends and family. [NYO]
• The Park Avenue apartment of late society staple Alice Polk Rutherfurd has been sold. The two-bedroom co-op at 1088 Park, which went on the market for $2.55 million in October, sold for $2.5 million to Marc Packer, a partner at Skadden Arps, and his wife, Caroline Packer, the vice president for public relations and special events at Saks Fifth Avenue. [Cityfile]
• Restaurateur Kiwon Standen, who co-owns Bar Blanc in the Village, has paid $2.38 million for a three-bedroom apartment at 31 West 12th Street. The co-op first went on the market for $3.35 million in September 2008. [Cityfile]

On December 29, 1947 Ted Danson was born. He brokethrough as playboy Sam Malone on Cheers, he went onto become the first man ever to admit to sleeping with Whoopi Goldberg, and is now the most sophisticated pothead on television.

After last week's thwarted terrorist attack, you'd heard that airlines and airports had stepped up security, and you can expect a friendly TSA employee to give you a good pat-down the next time you catch a flight. But prepare yourself for some ridiculous questions, too. Says one passenger: "They were asking us what we had for lunch." [NYP, CBS News]

Can you guess what movie this image comes from? Check back for the answer at 4pm today.

• You know that New York's crime rate is at an all-time low (or it's just a really slow news week) when NYPD commissioner Ray Kelly injects himself into any investigation involving Jon Gosselin that doesn't include the reality TV trainwreck's murder. Kelly says the NYPD has yet to determine whether someone really ransacked Jon Gosselin's Upper West Side apartment last weekend, or if it was just a big publicity stunt carried out by Gosselin and/or girlfriend Hailey Glassman. But the investigation continues, he says, so rest assured a few more of your tax dollars will be spent getting to the bottom of things. [NYDN]
• The call that Charlie Sheen's wife, Brooke Mueller, made to 911 on Christmas Day has been released. According to a one report, the couple's argument—in which Sheen allegedly pulled out a knife and said he'd kill her, thus landing him in the clink—was all over a Christmas present. [People, Us, E!]
• You knew Michael Lohan wasn't the world's best father or ex-husband. But he sounds like a pretty horrific fiancé, too. In newly filed court documents, Michael Lohan's ex, Erin Muller, says Lindsay Lohan's dad repeatedly abused her during their relationship, once beat her up for having a male friend on Facebook, and even kicked her "in the vagina" on one occasion. [TMZ]

Yesterday was Sienna Miller's birthday, and now it's Jude Law's turn: The actor, playboy, and NYU foe turns 37 today. Actress Mary Tyler Moore is turning 73. Ted Danson is 62. Paramount chief Brad Grey is 52. Actress Patricia Clarkson is 50. Matrix director/writer Andy Wachowski is 42. Cable news staple Ashleigh Banfield is also turning 42. Real estate marketer Michael Shvo is turning 37. Writer Paul Rudnick turns 52. Mekhi Phifer is 35. Singer Marianne Faithfull is 63. And actor (and father of Angelina) Jon Voight turns 71 today.

We've got hold of a copy of Celebrity, the subtly-named Scientology magazine that's supposed to be about... celebrities. Who's in it? Tom Cruise? John Travolta? Will Smith? Nope, it's...

This time she won't earn money for it, though. Charlie Sheen's wife's 911 call is out, and terrifying. Spencer Pratt is jealous of Jersey Shore. Paparazzi get pissed at Angelina. Come and get your Tuesday gossip!

Here's Charlie Sheen's wife's 911 call after he allegedly threatened her with a knife.

Another American has wandered into North Korea. Was 2009 Kim Jong-Il's best year ever, or what?

Good news: The Feds are finally savvy enough to scoop the blogosphere. Bad news: Now we'll never get a screen grab of his Facebook profile. Panty bomber Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab's social networking persona is emerging, and it's startlingly banal.

3D glasses: As lucrative as they are dorky. No less than four companies are fighting for the privilege to make it seem like things are popping out of the screen at you during your favorite 3D films.

Remember how, in Catch Me If You Can, fugitive Leonardo DiCaprio kept calling Detective Tom Hanks to taunt him? Here is a convicted burglar doing the same thing, in real time on Facebook. Should we celebrate or fear him?

On October 30th, Levi Johnston predicted to the Guardian that he and Bristol Palin would be "going to court" over custody of their son, Tripp. Prophetic! Less than a week later, Bristol secretly sued him for full custody of Tripp.

Rick Sanchez is usually a straight-forward, if shouty, news anchor. But tonight while filling in for Campbell Brown, Sanchez could barely contain his excitement over pictures of the Underwear Bomber's blasted briefs, obtained just minutes before by CNN.