Finally, the premiere of Celebrity Rehab. The show where Dr. Drew exploits serious and life-threatening addictions for our entertainment. Last night, however, belonged to Heidi Fleiss. When you outcrazy Dennis Rodman, you know you're doing something wrong... right...?!

We hope this pathetic torpedo test launch isn't necessarily indicative of our armed forces' skills. Otherwise... well, we're screwed.

When Vanessa Grigoriadis's Vanity Fair story about female power Twitter users she deemed "Twilebrities" went online the other day, the women in the story freaked out about it. So did their friends. What's the big deal?

We're only a week into 2010, this is true. But we're fairly confident that celebrity chef Wolfgang Puck has already snagged the worst accidental endorsement of the year. [NYDN]

Everyone may be enjoying their time at CES right now, but this guy can't wait for Macworld. You think you're a fanboy because you own a lot of Apple products? Child's play. Try getting the logo tattooed on your body.

Feathered hair, ripped jean cut-offs, muscle tees and tube socks: these were abundant in 1980s Brooklyn. After watching this video, one thing is clear: there's a void on TV that needs to be filled— and not by current Williamsburg residents.

George Will wrote about the Atlantic Yards mess! Which we learned about in an email blast from beloved Prospect Heights dive Freddy's! All of this is weird, to us. Especially the "agreeing with George Will" part!

David Patrick Columbia, beloved confidante to heiresses and socialites and proprietor of New York Social Diary, would like the media to get a few things straight about Casey Johnson. He also knows all about Casey's final days, the details of which he shared today on his website. It's compelling stuff:

Yesterday we looked at the strange phenomenon of Julia Allison rebloggers. We think they're weird and a little crazy. Some of you agreed with us, some of you didn't. So we thought we'd go to the source for more insight.

The guidos of coastal New Jersey can't really be called a peace-loving tribe, but when battle is done, it is usually for good reason and because one party is provoked. Sometimes it's just cause they're drunk. Either way—fascinating.

As expected, the new iteration of The A-Team looks to be an uninspired collection of boys playing with their guns and bad jokes. The highlight: a tank parachutes out of an exploding plane. Also Bradley Cooper's abs. Yowza!

CNBC's special Planet of the Apps (nice pun!) delved into the world of phone apps and how they change the world around us. The most intriguing? An app that consoles you during your impending financial doom with sexxxy naked ladies.

Now that it's extracted as much publicity as possible from its unauthorized Obama billboard in Times Square, outerwear company Weatherproof now says it's planning to take down its giant ad in Times Square. [AP]

Well, the bleakest season of Orange County yet continues apace, with divorce and bad parenting and vain attempts to redeem a questioned character. Could we be nearing the end of this great sunshiney reality experiment?

Today in the Gawker Book Club: Benoit Denizet-Lewis will be taking your questions on sex addiction, Tiger Woods, the sexual revolution, creepy NAMBLA members, and why the hell he lives in Boston.

Last night David Letterman's Late Show welcomed a special cameo by one of television's favorite fathers. Here's Homer Simpson reminding us of the things we've learned over the past double-decade, and a declaration exposing the irony in such a statement.

Just in time for bonus season, Goldman Sachs has been hit with two shareholder lawsuits accusing the board of "bad faith actions and breaches of...loyalty" for approving billions in bonuses while driving the global economy into a ditch.

Japan has given the world many unique and culturally valuable contributions: Haiku, the first novel, Kabuki and Noh theater, various martial arts, sumo wrestling, sushi, etc. Surely as important as all those is this bikini-clad man's lonely spastic dancing.

If you loved Martha Stewart's collection of cheap (and injurious!) junk for Kmart, you're going to be thrilled to hear about her latest venture. She's now offering Martha-approved destination weddings in partnership with the world's tackiest chain of resorts. (You know, the one that makes you hit the mute button on your TV every time one of their horrific commercials comes on the air.) Pick from one of six "themes"—with prices beginning at just $1,500—and leave it to Martha to make sure your "magical moment" is imbued with instant "star power"! [Luxist]

Ken Brown, an Illinois Goldman Sachs shareholder, filed this complaint against the company in New York State Supreme Court in Manhattan in January.