First legal male prostitute hired in Nevada. Compares himself to Rosa Parks. He shall overcome.

Diane Lane turns 45 today. Director Jim Jarmusch is 57. Actor Balthazar Getty is turning 35. Neil Bush, the brother of George and Jeb (and father of Lauren), turns 55. Actress Olivia d'Abo is 41. Steve Perry from Journey turns 61. Linda Blair of Exorcist fame is 51. And DJ Jazzy Jeff turns 45 today. A few people celebrating birthdays this weekend appear after the jump.

He's banned from bad-mouthing NBC for seven months. The Wall Street Journal don't think he can make it. But they do reveal that in parting negotiations he fired back by asking NBC execs not to disparage him either. [WSJ]

Michael Douglas unlocks the nuclear secret of how he keeps up with Catherine Zeta-Jones. Kim Kardashian gets punched in the face. Julianne Moore and Annette Bening make out. Everyone tries to cast the Game Change movie. TGIFriday gossip.

A Jewish teenager tried to pray on a flight from New York to Kentucky. He pulled out small boxes containing holy scrolls. Everyone panicked, according to the AP:

Moments ago, Conan O'Brien confirmed that tomorrow is his last day as host of The Tonight Show, but promised to go out with an NBC-bashing bang. Meanwhile, Jay Leno announced his return to 11:35 as David Letterman continued eviscerating him.

We have now seen every member of Senator-elect Scott Brown's family in some state of undress. Here's wife Gail Huff in a bikini, coaxing a tube of sunscreen to metaphoric orgasm, in a music video from 1982.

Hell yes, they're applying. As John Edwards vindicates their reporting on his infidelity and cover-up, Enquirer editor Barry Levine has applied for the Pulitzer. We, and others, are for it. Anything to give Frances Quinn's chub cheeks more play. [WaPo]

OkCupid put their community through statistical analysis and created an exhaustive, surprising guide to How Profile Pictures Work. For instance: Duckface gets more dates than smiles, but only if you're looking into the camera. [OKC] [Pic via]

Old Hollywood hottie could meet New Hollywood hottie in an upcoming film. What will happen? Will they generate so much heat that the Earth's atmosphere catches on fire? Rounding out a week of late-night news, it's a hottie-filled Trade Roundup!

Next time you're in charge of booking the keynote speaker for the White House Correspondents Dinner, don't pick someone who might become universally reviled. Jay Leno was booked weeks ago, and now he will stand awkwardly at the podium. [WaPo]

The Mystery of the "Charles & YaVaughnie" Billboards continues to unfold: Tonight, Oracle exec Charles Phillips admitted to having an 8 1/2 year "serious relationship" with YaVaughnie Wilkins, the billboard woman. But the mystery of his marriage only deepens.

And so the most important sociological experiment of our time ends not with a whimper, but a bang. Yup, Snooki and The Situation banging in the Jacuzzi. You know it's going to happen. Come, let us discuss.

Haniball Buress has a very unique name. Very often, he is asked questions about his name. So this is what it sounds like, when doves cry.

So, did I not tell everyone that this season would be better than the last one? To paraphrase Tim Gunn, it is time to recalibrate your expectations people! Project Runway is back!

The Interior Department may outlaw the importing of huge snakes: pythons, boa constrictors, etc. You'll still be able to own and buy them at pet stores, but the price should skyrocket. Goth teens and drug lords are not happy. [Wired]

Dave Winer wanted to smackdown David Carr's "cockamamie" columns; Liz Hanks was cajoled over her "breakup;" and a Wired editor demanded better excuses. The Twitterati have answers for you, but you're not going to like them.

• Rumor has it Danny Meyer and Ian Schrager are currently in "advanced talks" to open a restaurant on the roof of the Gramercy Park Hotel. [P6]
• Will we see the classic tiki bar make a comeback in 2010? [NYT]
• Minetta Tavern introduces brunch service this weekend. [UD]
• New Tavern on the Green operator Dean Poll has yet to seal a deal with the union or city (or even finalize the name), but he's lined up a new GM. [P6]
• Is it possible the restaurants in London are better than the ones here? [GS]
• Two "disaster-relief socials" benefiting Haiti took place last night. [SF, HP]
• NYC's oldest gay bar, Julius, has been shuttered by the DoH. [Eater]
• Gwyneth Paltrow has a tasty Vietnamese salad she'd love to share with you.

Tonight we'll be glued to Jersey Shore, NBC's comedy lineup, and The Late Night Wars. What are you watching tonight? Let us know in the comments.

Obese Americans face tons of problems in this day and age— especially in the love department! While sassy cam-girl/activist, Deirdra, juggles several "bi-sizual," fat admiring boyfriends; bedridden 650 lb. Alan hasn't had sex with his wife in 10 years.