In your slushy Wednesday media column: Keith Olbermann sniffs out media bias whether it exists or not, a way to save magazines in fantasyland, PARADE's editor leaves, and Air America totally owes media people money.

Anderson Cooper and boyfriend Ben Maisani are adopting a child from Haiti, at least according to the ever-reliable National Enquirer. [Gawker]

Things get pretty extreme in this video when this BASE jumper dude swings off of a cliff and does a back flip before deploying his parachute.

Fame has come for Snooki, and like any unconventional looking woman who's landed in the spotlight, someone feels the need to make over her image into one of bland conformity. This time it's Inside Edition and the results are frightening.

When Fox and Friends welcomed Jim Belushi and Bruce Jenner onto today's program, they opened the bit with a faux-six degrees of separation chart that may have stretched a few facts. Jenner notices, stating "that's just how news works here."

This Sunday, gay guys and straight guys will be rubbing elbows at Superbowl parties across country. Some of them will even hit it off and want to become friends. This is progress, people, but like anything, there are some rules.

Just when you think its all been said and done with iPad spoofs, someone throws one from left field and actually compares the thing to something other than a tampon. "Take nachos for example."

The whole thing is supposed to be adorable, and it is, sorta. In the same kind of funny/sad way that this video was cute but also quietly unsettling. Though the husband assures us in the site's FAQs section that his wife is perfectly mentally fit and doesn't bawl uncontrollably at everything in life, just silly movies, we just don't know, man. This lady is a liiiittle wacky. What happens when she watches, like, Night and Fog? Does her face just fall off? Another scary fact: Apparently she "used to cry at the end of The Little Mermaid when she was 4." So this person is 25-years-old, tops. Unless the guy's talking about the weird Richard Chamberlain version where she turns to sea foam at the end. Is that the one? We doubt that's the one. Point being: What happens when she has kids? This, we guess.

While the co-hosts of The View agree that the "r" word is unacceptable, Whoopi and Sherri shut down Barbara when she suggests that it's in the same category as the "n" word.

Here we have two guys reenacting Donkey Kong — complete with barrels and sound effects straight out of the 80's. This real-life simulation shows just how difficult it is to dodge a actual barrel being thrown at you.

Citigroup chief Vikram Pandit is blogging! Well, not exactly. But he does make an appearance on "The New Citi Blog," a site the bank launched earlier this week to try and convince the public—and Washington—that Citi has totally changed since the financial crisis unfolded and is now totally focused on making the world a better place:

While discussing Matt's interview with Michelle Obama on "Roses and Thorns," Matt asks Meredith where her thorn is. We assume she thought her mic was off when she replied right before commercial break, "in my butt."

Douchebag Advertising genius Donny Deutsch says it didn't "make sense" for Mancrunch.com to try to buy a Super Bowl ad, because, come on, how many gays would be watching football? Eh? Castigat ridendo mores, Donny Deutsch. [Agency Spy]

Every season, wannabes crash Fashion Week shows and parties. But few are as brazen as the daughter of a Vermont gubernatorial candidate and her BFF, who allegedly hacked into a fashion PR company's database. (I kind of admire their moxie!)

When someone thinks of New Jersey, upscale tiki restaurant shouldn't spring to mind. And when a narrow-minded witch of an owner abuses her staff and serves filet mignon on roof tiles, it's time for Gordon Ramsay to step in.

The idiotic "trend-tracking firm" that announced this past fall that New York had lost the title of "fashion capital of the world" has returned with another silly list. Global Language Monitor, which is based in fashionable Austin, Texas, says its "proprietary algorithm" has identified the "top 15 fashion buzzwords" of 2010, a list that begins with "Lady GaGa" [sic] and is followed by "leggings 2.0":

Channing Tatum finally explained his mysterious penis-injury on Regis and Kelly this morning. He accidentally had boiling water poured down his wet suit on-set, resulting in scalding all "all the way down" and "very little skin in places."

Scotland: "The home of the bagpipe and penicillin." Well how can you not invest there? Then again, France is the home of organum and aspirin. Tough choices. Provocative ad, in any case. [Copyranter]

Damon Lindelof and Carton Cuse dropped by Jimmy Kimmel Live last night to announce the day the show will end its run: Sunday, May 23rd. Then they all joked about a "Hurley and the Smoke Monster" spinoff. Which we'd watch.